if you learn anything from my DH's death, let it be this.

[Yorkiegirl]

Message withdrawn

Sound advice Yorkiegirl. DH & i found this out a while back, after we'd had two LOs, and we were so shocked by the implications that we scurried down the aisle as soon as we could arrange it. Aside from the financial aspects, what shocked us most was that if one of the children needed hospital treatment only I could sign the consent form, even tho' DH is their father, on birth certificate etc.
Hope you enjoyed legoland BTW

Message withdrawn

Thank you for posting this yorkiegirl!

DP and I aren't married and I think that we may ring up next week to see if we can do it soon. It's one of those things we've always thought needed doing but neither of us wanted the fuss/ organisation of it all so 7 years after getting engaged we're thinking this may be it. Quickie wediing in DP's lunch hour and pub afterwork perhaps ( he has no holiday left!)

I'm so sorry for your loss and that it's taken someone's grief and generosity of spirit to get us to do the right thing. You are truly a star

Message withdrawn

it's silly when unmarried couples say oooh we don't need to get married, it's just a piece of paper. but like you say yorkiegirl it's just that piece of paper that really does provide security and peace of mind. thanks for this thread.

Thanks yorkiegirl, really wasn't aware of this, would love to get married but have never really seen it as a priority, certainly will now. take care xx

Thanks for posting this, YG.

bumping for you yg

bump

Excellent post YG, DH and I got married for this reason. Also, if not married you are not considered next of kin, I believe, you can't register the death. DH was taken critically ill when dd was 6 weeks old, we weren't married then and as a result I couldn't give medical consent for the diagnostic tests he needed and his parents had to drive 250 miles overnight to do it instead. Fortunately he recovered but if he'd died (which was very possible) dd and I would have been in the sh!t.

It's very generous of you to consider others at this time.

sound advice yorkiegirl

You are SO right Yorkiegirl

(I just need to get over my horror at being someone's wife

argh why do they have to use that word)

yorkiegirl it is indeed thoughtful of you to post on this

However even if you are married, there can still be serious problems. A friend of mine recently wrote this article under a pseudonym. When her dh died, although they were ostensibly well off she has been left in a dire position.

Thanks for the info YG.

So, what kind of differences are we talking about then? Apart from the Widowed Parent Allowance? Would appreciate some more detail if anyone has it. DP & I aren't particularly keen to get married but if it means DS would be considerably more secure then we'll consider it.

Sorry for your loss Yorkie, you are so brave.

Message withdrawn

YG- wise words and humbling that you are thinking of others

i'm going to show my dp this thread to get his arse into gear

Message withdrawn

you are RIGHT Yorkiegirl

www.oneplusone.org.uk/marriedornot/

here is a summary

I do urge you all to read that article too.

this one I mean

Message withdrawn