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urgent advice needed, does this mean im pregnant?

88 replies

movingonwardsorsidewards · 24/12/2011 17:54

I've just done a test as my period was late, and there is one very clear line and one not so clear. If there are 2 lines it means you are pregnant. Do you think its positive even tho the 2nd line is a lot lighter?

OP posts:
TheBrandyButterflyEffect · 30/12/2011 22:41

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Sparklingbrook · 30/12/2011 22:43

I can't see OP wanting to come back to this thread, that's for sure.

flippinada · 31/12/2011 09:05

I've just stumbled on this and movingon my heart goes out to you.

Like many other posters I've been in the same position as you. I chose to have an abortion and I've never felt guilty, just relieved.

ButterflyEffect I agree about the tone of the posts and if MN think it's OK to leave them up it..well it's a very bad call IMO.

rooksby · 31/12/2011 10:16

Dear OP, please ignore people spouting their own agenda and do what's right for your family.

Just to quickly spout my own though - adoption is easier to live with than abortion? Well, I and my birth family would beg to differ. 30 odd years later the ramifications of giving me up (termination not an option in the time/place) are threatening to destroy a marriage, several sibling relationships and a mother-daughter one. Not to mention the issues I struggled with growing up and my adoptive parents had to deal with. It really annoys me when "pro-lifers" go on about adoption, it is NOT an easy option for anyone. When it is chosen in preference to abortion that's fine, I want women to have choices, but when it is presented as the only choice misery lies ahead for many people.

I am sorry if what I've posted upsets anyone, I just wanted to show a viewpoint that seems to rarely be considered.

BoffinMum · 31/12/2011 10:27

Adoption can be extremely traumatic for half-siblings that arrive later on, I can tell you that. My half sister's blundering about after finding my dad on Friends Reunited did a massive amount of damage to my family and split us right apart. I think it also did a lot of damage before she actually turned up, as a lot of people were estranged from each other in the extended family and I never quite knew why, but now I have realised it was probably because of her existence. All that human misery, but hey, at least this was before the 1960's Abortion Act and David bloody Alton would approve.Angry

BoffinMum · 31/12/2011 10:29

I should add that I do like my half sister, and don't hold any of this against her as it' hardly her fault her mother was forced to bear her.

Olympics2012OliviaMumsnet · 31/12/2011 10:39

Hello
We are moving this thread to antenatal choices
Thanks
M Towers

YuleingFanjo · 31/12/2011 11:57

why not move the thread to ethical dilemmas instead?

JjandtheBean · 31/12/2011 12:44

I just wanted to add my support for the OP,

I've also had a termination and it was the best decission I've ever made for myself. I have no guilt and certainly no regret.

I have since had two healthy children who I wouldn't have had. Had I continued that pregnancy.

Good luck op.

JenniferEight · 31/12/2011 13:02

Hi OP. I'm really sorry you're going through this. I know what you mean about feeling like your body is gearing up for the new baby, it's very hard to go against that physical process for me, which is why in your situation (very similar in fact) I kept cancelling my appointments for an abortion. I think they got really sick of me Smile

I did this about 5 times and then decided to keep the baby, which I had wanted to do all along in my heart but not in my head iyswim...no one was on my side for keeping it. I needed permission to, and one friend did say, go ahead and have your baby and that was enough for me to do it though she was only an internet friend and lived in another country...I didn't care who she was.

But then I did hate the pregnancy, couldn't bond with my baby, right up until he was born, and then I did love him very much. He's four now.
If I could choose again, of course I wouldn't give back my little boy but then it was an awful decision to make and neither option was the 'right' one. I just had to choose the one I could live with the easiest, iyswim.

I'm single too, and do you know what, having two babies makes me feel like a 'real' mother which I never did with just the one. So it's been good for us all. but I totally understand where you are coming from and I want you to know that I hope you are doing Ok, and will come to terms with all of this and be at peace with your decision.

Take care

Olympics2012OliviaMumsnet · 31/12/2011 13:52

Hello
Apologies to the OP that this thread has been derailed somewhat by this debate.
And apologies too I was hasty in moving this thread - I will move it now
M Towers

movingonwardsorsidewards · 04/01/2012 19:23

Thank you to everyone that has been supportive and for telling choc where to go, I really appreciate it. I really dont care what people like her think. As I have made this decision as its the best thing for me and my dc.

To go ahead and have a baby that I don't want is a ridiculos idea. So I'm not taking notice of those unhelpfull comments.

OP posts:
mamalovesmojitos · 04/01/2012 19:28

Good for you. Sorry the thread went the way it did. I wish you every strength, happiness and success in the future. Onwards and upwards Smile. X.

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