Mumsnet: The Rules - things a good Mother should never do

[northerner]

1. Bottlefeed

2. Smoke outside the school 3. Feed grapes to children in Supermarket

Carry on...

Give 'em biscuits to shut 'em up while you read MN.

I've done that a couple of times

couple here = several. ok every day.

leave em unattended whilst you nip over the road to a beach bar ............

Let baby drive car.

Message withdrawn

let baby drive you to the beach bar.

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bum their children's fags

sorry, did I say the f word?

Tell them Tony Blair is a lying scumbag for taking us to an illegal war, and then have to come up with a right-on answer as to why he's not "rotting in jail" mummy.

Let them get tattoos

Let them read the Daily Mail

Tell them breastfeeding is unnatural

Give them whisky

Send the to the shops with a note to buy fags/booze, because you can't be arsed

Last night I dreamt I taught ds to say "Grannie has got a flabby old fanny." Would that be on the list?

Oh - never go anywhere without a tablecloth, of course.

Feed them purely on Wotsits, Micro-chips and blue fizzy pop.

My friend has taught both of her kids and her parrot to say "f off fat nanna" to her MIL. That would be top of my list of things not to do!

Scream 'how can you be so bloody thick' when your kid is having trouble with homework.

pmsl at the homework one.

Get their kids ears pierced

flirt with daddycool.

have a baby-on-board sign in the car
or worse a mum-to-be one

Oooh 006 you beat me to it - I was going to say pay the off-licence bill with the child allowance.

Dislike other people's children.

Get her ds's ear(s) pierced

Let him have a sleeveless hoody

use dispoable nappies

Put baby in the buggy with no cosi-toes in December

bottlefeed in Starbucks

bf for an hour in front of MN instead of giving baby breakfasr