Your psychic encounters....

[Lizzer]

Ok, not a deadly serious one but I am in really interested in people's brushes with fate, meetings with mediums, palm readings, tarot card predictions etc...
I am really considering getting an reading done myself soon. I have had a quick one done before and it has turned out pretty correct. I talked to my friend about it and she says she prefers not to know, anyone think like that or thinks it's a load of bull? Anyone been conned completely or amazed at their's??

Incidently, anyone have the Living channel and watched 'crossing over with John Edwards'? I was fascinated when I watched it at a friend's house recently - but then it's only (american) TV and could be utter rubbish...

Lizzer, will think of some and get typing but got to go and start dinner in a min a dh will be home shortly and I will instantly be removed from the pc so he can get some work done. Will try and get done tomorrow for ya.

Cheers Joe, Sorry I'm harrassing you too now -what a nice person I am!

Keep pestering Lizzer, life is a bit hectic right now so no time today but will get some to you by the weekend, promise.

Lizzer

No I didn't win a thing on the lotto! I can only really get onto the net when I am in the office mon-weds as the computer there is far quicker than the one at home and at the mo work is a tad quiet. Then I go quiet after that as I never seem to have a moment to myself anymore!

Snugs sorry to hear you were unwell - you poor thing - make sure you take it VERY easy, a friend of mine had viral M and it took a little longer than she thought to get over it but then she did immediately attempt to dive straight back into work etc...

Hi, back again.

Had more weird coincidences concerning the ex-bf. Is something up there trying to tell me something?

Does anyone know what a high incidence of strange coincidences means????

hedgehog

I read an article that fate does steer us in the right direction with 'coincidences' etc. For example if you are trying to buy a house and everything goes very smoothly it was meant to be but if there are constant difficulties it is time to listen to that 'inner voice' and re-evaluate whether or not to go ahead. maybe there is something you need to do or hear from your ex bf that will help you in the future - it won't necessarily mean a tempting or bad thing!!

Hi Tlb,

I don't know what the coincidences are meant to mean, perhaps that remains to be seen, the list is now as long as a toilet roll.

On Saturday evening, by sheer coincidence, I walked into his birthday party, where he spent the evening talking to me. The rest of the evening one of his colleagues was telling me how much the ex-bf still cared about me and that he still has my photo up in his office. So why is he ignoring me now?

What is more, in a strange sort of way it felt like a family reunion in reverse as his brother (who I had never met)was there and they have the same names as my two brothers but the age order is reversed.

Ah well, never mind. Boo hoo hoo!!!!.

hedgehog

I am sure you are very happily married etc etc and this is hopefully a nice warm fantasy to make you feel even better ( I am going by my own thoughts here btw) and I mean that in the nicest possible way.

So, the fact that he is ignoring you shouldn't be a surprise a) you're married with a family and therefore 'out of bounds' and b) when YOU fancied the pants off someone didn't you just try to be 'cool' and pretend you didn't just in case..?

Sorry I haven't replied sooner - have been off work as my childcarer was on holiday

Hi Tlb

1. I'm NOT married any more- my divorce will be pronounced on 7th of November. (Thank God)

2)My ex-husband is a violent alcoholic, hence 1)

3)I'm a single mum of 4 kids- enough to put any one off!

4)I'm most definitely not out of bounds!!!

hedgehog

Good on you for getting out of a horrible marriage.

What are you waiting for all the signs are good from what you say re ex bf!!

Sorry didn't know all the history!!

Good luck

That is as may be but recently I asked him (politely by Email) if he fancied going out to dinner some time. He declined as he felt it would be "inappropriate" and that he didn't want to "go down the road to familiarity" and feels that his "lack of willpower would be to blame".

I must have scared the pants off him (literally!!!) I still haven't found out how I'm supposed to have scared him!

Needless to say, I haven't heard a thing since. (sniffle)

Has this ever happened to you?

Last Friday night I had a vivid dream of loss. I rarely remember my dreams but this one stuck. Although part of me stayed detached throughout, I dreamed I had been told I was dying and was trying to come to terms with it, and simply couldn't. I couldn't face leaving my children and felt I had too many things left to do. Great, great, relief when I woke up to a normal Saturday morning at home. I wondered if the dream meant I would hear some bad news. A few hours later I saw a tearful elderly neighbour who told me her sister had died very suddenly. I thought that was it.

Yesterday (Wednesday),an old friend phoned me to say his mother had suddenly died of a massive heart attack. Speaking about this to my husband that evening, he told me he'd heard of another death - our son had told him one of his classmates had lost his mother during the summer holidays.

I then mentioned my dream to my husband, who told me he had had a similar dream recently. He went into his dream in a little more detail - and it matched mine. We then checked dates and realised we had dreamed the same dream on the same night.

What does that mean? anyone like to hazard a guess?

I haven't a clue what it means Tigermoth (I hope someone does though) but that totally sent a chill down my spine...

In my dream book to dream of dying is the same as dreaming of death, except that the prediction is less imminent. If you dreamed of being dead yourself it indicates an approaching release from all your worries and/or a recovery from illness.

So perhaps it is a fortunate omen that you both dreamed the same dream of dying - maybe it means a lottery win or something of that ilk in the future that will release you from any worries you may have. Or something else is going to happen in the long term that will mean a happier/stable future for you all.

With all the unhappy news recently and all those poor bereaved families from the WTC perhaps it was your subconscious coming to terms with the facts and reminding you how important your family is to you and you have lots to enjoy together and be thankful for.

I'd see it as a good dream for the future rather than one that may appear as a bad omen.

Emmam, many thanks for that. I have to admit that I have been dreaming more and waking up with feelings of unease since the terrorist attacks.

Glad your book gives such an optimistic interpretation. Off to buy lottery tickets now!

Bet you feel relieved Tigermoth. I did think that your dreams were opposites or someone told me that anyway.

Please take a look at this everyone, it goes a bit beyond this thread but still relevant:

Ok, I wasn't going to share this co-incidental (or not?) experience but things took a strange turn last night and so I feel I have to get it all down to make sense of it...
First link in the chain was Tuesday night at college when a friend rushed in helf-way through and apologised for being late, looking on the verge of tears. I spoke to her in the break and she explained her step-dad had been treating her Mum terribly (I won't go into details but use your imagination) and she was, obviously, really stressed as it was about to happen again as he was drunk. I tried to advise her and listened to her and when I got home put it to the back of my mind. However my mind must have been working overtime as that night I had a very vivid dream about my ex (and dd's dad - for those of you who don't know we spilt when I was pregnant because of his drinking and behaviour, and he has not seen her for 18 months (she was 4 months old)) The dream was so true to life and basically would have been the story of mine and my daughter's lives had I not left when I did. You know when you get the sort of dream that is so true it lingers with you all the next day and makes you shudder to think about it?
So, on the Wednesday I bundled dd into the pushchair for her afternonn nap, wrapped her up snugly as the wind was howling, but the sun was so bright and strong. I set out on my usual country walk of about 3 miles and my mind began to race. I realised that I had not let out much of my emotions about the break-up of our relationship for such a long time and had never really dealt with some of them at all. I began to think of all the things that had gone wrong and that how his treatment of me was absolutely shocking (throwing stereo down the stairs at my head, while 6 months pg - for a start (I can't believe I just typed that for all to read, but it's true)) and that I had a right to have a better, well balanced relationship and that I'm glad I didn't bring dd into his world - as had been the case in my dream. So tears flowing I marched for a good 5 miles in the end, wind blowing in my hair and face (am hoping passing cars thought that was why my eyes were so red!) It was such good therapy and I returned home as dd woke from her nap in a lovely mood and everything seemed at peace with the world.

I remained in an empowered mood until last night when lo and behold after over a year of not being in touch who do I get a text message from on my phone?? No prizes for guessing it was my ex. I've had two now the first saying precisely 'how's my daughter?' (like, what am I supposed to reply to that?) which I ignored and then sarcastically, 'have you lost the use of your hands?' I really can't believe the lousy timing, just when I was getting things straight in my head, just when I was thinking how horrible it would be if I had to be in touch with him. I know I can't keep dd away forever, and I have NEVER said for him not to get in touch (actually went to visit him in September (lives a good hours drive away) it was all arranged with him, and when I got there he had gone out because he 'couldn't handle it', so we had to return home) I always knew she would want to see him when she was older. But I just wish it wasn't now, she's too precious to be chewed up and spat out by him, which I know he will do. He does it to everyone else in his life.
Sorry, I don't know what I'm asking for here really. Not a solution as I know it will never be that final but I just feel physically sick when I think about it all... Hope this all makes sense to you, just needed to get it all down on, I was going to say 'paper' then, er, what century do I live in!

Lizzer, this sounds really upsetting. I can't believe he has the cheek to communicate with you by text message in the light of his previous nasty behaviour(and be abusive when you didn't reply). It's horrible that his "messages" came at a time when you were reflecting on him and trying to deal with still raw feelings about how he treated you. I wish I could help. You sound like such a lovely person in your posts and you don't deserve this kind of treatment. (No one does)
One small thing- can you change your mobile number? I don't see why he needs access to it- if he wants to be involved with your baby then he has to prove that he's worthy of that honour and won't treat her as he's treated you and others and it'd be a start if he called your landline and communicated like a proper adult.
I'll be thinking of you, Lizzer. Keep being the strong, caring, funny, silly in a good way person that you are and don't let him ruin the life you've carved out for yourself and your daughter .

Lizzer,

I know exactly how you feel. Just this morning I was thinking how nice it was that I hadn't heard from X-hub for a long time, and guess who rang, demanding to come over to Belgium and see the children?. At least he wasn't drunk this time.

You made the right choice, for yourself and your daughter. Don't ever forget that. I know all about the being chewed up and spat out bit, I put up with it for far too long. We all DESERVE BETTER than that!!!! People like your ex and my X-hub are so destructive that they are not just content to destroy themselves but want to drag others with them and I truly believe that some form of telepathic link remains, even after they have left so that somehow they sense when we are feeling better about ourselves and just can't wait to get back in there to drag us down again. BE STRONG. You have been coping so well, don't let him drag you down again. I know how it feels, my thoughts are with you.

On a happier note, my decree nisi will be through on 7th of November and the decree absolute by the end of December so I will be a legally free women to start the new Year with!!!!!!

I can imagine how you are feeling Lizzer and how protective you must be over your dd. He has to prove he can be a father and not keep popping in and out of her life when he feels like it. Text message, coward. Try not to worry too much right now, you will probably find he will change his mind again soon, especially when the realisation of paying for his daugther hits home (assuming he doesnt pay anything at the moment).
Hope you threw the stereo back at him. My ex-husband threw a carton of milk at me once and the shock on his face when it came flying back at him.
Hedgehog - its a great feeling when the divorce is finally through, I even went to the court and waited for my absolute. I now have a great husband and a very happy life at last, good luck for the New year.

Oh Lizzer, I just don't know what to say. You seem to me to be very resiliant. Did you feel invaded when you got that text message? I think that's how I would have felt.

You say you've been coming to terms with the past and it helped to get some of your thoughts down on paper - of the virtual kind. Would it help to write a letter to your ex, outlining your feelings and how you want things to be between you in the future? ie he must write or phone you direct - think about what you would prefer. Say you will not answer him otherwise. I, too, think changing your mobile number is worth considering.

If you feel in control over the way he contacts you it might help?

If it's any consolaton, my mother and father, separated at the time, fought bitterly over me when I was a toddler. In the sixties, I gather, it was far more likely that a child could be taken away from its mother and given to its father, if the mother was proved unfit by the courts. My mother, so I am told, had very real cause to worry. When things were at their worst, ( I guess when I was around 2 - 5 years) every time a stranger came to the door, my mother and grandmother locked me up in the bathroom with one of them while the other answered the door.

I have only the faintest memory of this. It took my counsin to remind me - she told me of incidents that I have no recollection of at all. My mother loved me dearly and made a very happy life for me and that's most definitely what I remember.

It sounds like you have a lovely family - your mother,father, brother and younger sister. I think you made a strong and wise decision to return to them. I'm sure your little girl will look back and know she had lots of love from you all.

Dear Lizzer, that must have been a terrible time for you when you were with your ex and for the last 18 months you had put it behind you, so for him to contact you in such a cowardly, nasty way is totally out of order. But you sounds like you have gained so much strength in that time and have a wonderful family for support, don't let him get a foothold with these type of mindgames. I agree with ScummyMummy about changing your mob no if you can. He needs to prove to you that he is a responsible person who can behave and talk to you in an adult fashion before he is worthy of seeing your dd for even a short time (but like you said, you had never tried to stop him in the past).
I had a similar experience to Tigermoth - my Dad tried to make out that my Mum was totally mad and an unfit mother when they were getting divorced It was a horrible time (I was 11) but I was so lucky to have such a loving Mum and family and you've got that too, and your dd will always be surrounded by love from the people who matter to her the most.

Hi Everyone! Big thanks to you for replying - I'm genuinely touched. Like I said on my message it was good therapy in itself to write everything down, but it was even better to read all your messages of support. Tigermoth you are so right when you say the word 'invaded', that's exactly how I feel. I have this lovely environment surrounding her like a bubble and suddenly I may have to take my daughter into this horrible world that I managed to get out of and which would be so unfamiliar to her. It's really quite frightening, even though I knew it would happen one day I think this was just a lesson to me to remember how close that day could be. If I can just ask you Hedgehog, how you deal with X-hub, does he come to visit you or do you take your children to him? (Such perfect timing with his phonecall wasn't it- not!But great news about divorce papers )

As an update, I haven't heard anything since and I didn't reply to the text message, it did seem such cowardly behaviour given the fact he's not been intouch for so long. Therefore I assume that he was probably very drunk when he sent them (no major suprise there). I'm glad I wasn't sucked into the whole texting thing, I was very tempted to reply with something sarcastic but I knew this would ultimately lead into a row, with him being drunk it would only get nasty. I wish, like you say Joe, I could've stood up for myself a bit more at the time - but I was utterly pathetic in our relationship and it took me about 3 yrs and a pregnancy to finally say 'enough is enough, I deserve better'. But although I can say that proudly to you now, I still turn into a doormat whenever I am confronted with his presence. I try to be strong in my head but what I learnt while with him was that it was easier to be quiet and un-confrontational as I didn't get treated quite as badly, even though I lost out in other ways (is the term I'm looking for here 'put up and shut up'? I think, sadly, it is.) However, I don't think I could do that at all with dd's happiness in mind and would fight as much as humanly possible for her, so hopefully the next time he contacts me I'll be prepared. At least some good's come out of it. Sorry I'm off on one again here aren't I!

Finally to answer your points about changing my phone no. It would seem a good idea, but unfortunately it wouldn't work as I still see his Mum and Sister and they have my mobile no as I get on with them fine.(BTW, he is living at his Mum's at the moment and I go there to visit her every now and again, which he knows about, and he chooses to actually stay away from his home for the day - there are no limits to this man's callousness!) If I told them not to give a new phone no. to Ex it would cause a bit of friction I think? Although they can understand my position they do not want to start a conflict with him. But if I could get away with it I would, just for peace of mind and it is such a horrible way to get in touch - text messages should be left for jokes and making quick arrangements, nothing more.

The final and last thing I'm going to say in this message/essay (!) is I have been thinking about writing to him, as Tigermoth says, for months and everytime I come to write anything down I just freeze, I guess I'm scared of the possible repercussions of my actions and I don't want to start a snowball effect I have no control over. But do any of you think this would, in the long term, be of benefit to me and dd? Basically, do you think I should write at all?

Sorry for roping you into all this and I'm much more emotionally stable (hmm..!) since the last message, thanks again for your responses and apologies for typos as have just had ran this off really fast