Would anyone like a cup of tea and a muffin?

[MadBadandDangerousToKnow]

I'm tired and in need of refreshment.

The tea room is now officially open, serving hot chocolate, tea, freshly-squeezed orange juice and a range of home-baked muffins. Tablecloths and crockery are charmingly mismatched antiques (no Cath Kidston here). We overlook an attractive although somewhat overgrown garden, with a distant view of rolling countryside.

Everyone is welcome but house rules dictate that anyone indulging in fisticuffs will be ejected.

Please come in.

Heinz tomato soup from a tin! Why didn't I think of that befor? Yum yum (although I have made my own in the past, honest).

'More time for leisure'. Hmm. I wasn't joking. Nothing so crude. Oh no. I was playfully subverting some of the sterotypical assumptions so easily made about mothers of one child. See earlier threads about fascinators and Mary Jane shoes.

Please be careful if you fall off the sofa, as there are still some empty gin bottles rolling around.

How funny! Bucharest has an enormous pan of homemade leek, potato and crumbled blue cheese sitting plupping on the stove.....Have hd 2 bowls, but there's plenty left...help yourselves.....(dp won't touch leeks- farrrr too anglo-saxon for his meditteranean tummy)

Oh dear. It's difficult to type with one hand holding a tin opener.

Repeat after me. B-e-f-o-r-e. S-t-e-r-e-o-t-y-p-i-c-a-l.

yum Bucharest! pass over a bowl please. I have had two flapjacks (bought not made) at my desk today not happy in any respect!!

Oh, Bocca, you are FAR too subtle for me!! When I can see for swigging gin and adjusting my fascinator I totaly don't have any irony left. Oops that nearly came out as ironing of which I have plenty

Lady Bracknell voice: Shop bought cake?

Hello - are you open? I'm looking for respite from some of the recent threads, and this seems like such a nice place

I'll have a latte if the machine's on...

If the doors open, the cafe is open. Its a bit serve yourself and put the money in the dishonesty box to be honest.

Regular latte ?

And do you have any toecovers crafts to bring ?

Better make it a large latte, please - it's been a long week.

No crafts to bring I'm afraid - but I can strum "When I'm 64" on my guitar if that's alright?!

i can just about play wonderful tonight on the guitar

One large latte coming up. Its a triple shot latte for me - DS appeared at 4.30am and would only go back to sleep on top of me.

I have fossicked around behind the counter and found some chocolate muffins too ?

A little light music will make a change from DS (2.5) singing Bread of Heaven at me. He only knows three lines of words for it though, so it is a little trying as he just repeats them over and over

Pah. Someone has appropriated the last muffin. Investigation of the freezer reveals a slightly freezer burnt brioche, and some worthy delicious whole grain, ground by artisans bread.

here you go cmot

bbpants - quite frankly with a name like that you should be an mn superstar!!!! Respect!

• Everyone starts offering bbpants the chair next to theirs in the hope that they will be considered cool just be being near her!!!

So... (t42 swishes ponytail to try to show she is one of the gang here and suddenly starts wearing Boden??? Boden???) let me introduce to you Bocca - who is the boss around here while madbad is away. Think of her as the second Godfather please, Jacksmama - our very own Mama in Canada, Che Guevara Rebeccamulan, Bucharest queen of smiles, daisy our very own trouser and shoe finder, Pag the WAG - well she looks like a WAG with that thing she is wearing on her head, cmotdibbler - who says "PAH" quite a lot, squeaver - the hat wearer, soprano - who I plan to buy a pain au chocolat alomond for- I had my first in rl and it is even more delisiouso than a croissant and... and... so many more people who are peace loving, Mary Jane shoe wearing hubbly bubbly smokin' and Cath Kidston cup holding mners!!!!

WELCOME!!!! Here is your latte (T42 realises bbpants she already has four lined up as we all squabble to be her friend).... did you want some sugar and a biscuit too bbpants???

OH NOOOO NOOOOO NOOOO - cmotdibbler please say Pah as often as you possibly can - it is lovely!!!! With a catchphrase as good as that I imagine you to be yellow and living in Springfield (this is a really really big compliment because me and dd are maaaahooooosiive Simpsons fans!!!!)

i am comfy thank you

Ooooooooooooooooooooooh - 'ello mrsmortenharket - I was so busy helping my lathered up only to get down from the toilet in time to "doe a deer" from the sound of music (this is the soundtrack to our lives at the mo - everything has to be done while dancing to this) that I didn't notice you slip in....

Wonderful tonight on the guitar hey???

Aaaaaaaaawwww... I heart Eric Clapton big stylie... lets play lots of his music today in the cafe in honour of mrsmortenharket!!!!!!!!!!

www.youtube.com/watch?v=nHC0mX-Er_E

My favourite....

www.youtube.com/watch?v=5aDykZEATzk

Oo now that's FAR better than When I'm 64. Here - have my guitar. I'll lead the waving of the lighters...

Or will that set off the fire alarm?

Oh looook mrsmortonharket also knows a few Beatles tunes - what about "Daytripper" can you play that???....

mrsmortonharket looks a little shy... ok... I will give it a go... she starts to play...

www.youtube.com/watch?v=sIbRgVQMjbQ&feature=related

WOW - listen to that guitar cry an' sing!!!! - She tears it up and makes it her own - wow - R.E.S.P.E.C.T!!!!

Wow - groovy, man

t42 offers bbpants one of squavers emergency cigarettes (she won't mind!)! BBpants first puts a trilby on her head, then takes not one but two cigarettes, lights them both and hands one to the now quaking T42 - everyone gasps with amazement bbpants is so so so cool!!!

T42 realises that Mrsmortonharket and bbpants have turned our cafe into a cool hang out - "This is just like Monmarte in the 1920s!" she smiles. "But I don't think we should drink absinthe though." she quickly adds!

T42 then notices the time - bwaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhh bleeerdy mn I am going to be late for work!!!! Bye for now!!!! mwaaaaaaaaaah mwaaaaaaaaaaaah talk sooooooooooooooon my cafe society friends!!!!!!!!!

Hmm - hope you've got another one, Mrsmortonharket - I was enjoying the singsong. Oh, and while you're here, let me tell you about the time I saw Aha live in Croydon - probably 1986ish?!

Morning morning!!!

right, I'm bagging the horse hair sofa and a double shot latte.

Busy day so so. DH gone away for work and DS spent a LOT of time examing the ELC Toy Catalogue- he keeps saying "MUMMY read it!!"

LOL at the soundtracks of your lives - Bread of Heaven and Doe a Deer much more sophisticated. My DS does "old macdonald has a farm" over and over and over - just that line and then a few EI EI ows

Wow, this place has become cool Who found the lava lamps?

OK Bocca, they are shop bought but I defy you not to try!!!

lol at T42 descriptions of us,

PAH, (just to confuse newbies!)