Neurodiversity support thread for women with suspected, diagnosed or self-diagnosed autism, ADHD and other NDs #18

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As usual, latest support thread.

Welcome

Weaver glad you're calmer and glad to hear a local paper has done a better job.

I am so tired tonight I think I could have fallen asleep next to DS.
There is a storm rolling in now.... I like storms. and it will be nice if it's cooler
as long as the kids sleep through it

Ok. I need to move off my bottom and go to bed a proper time.

Ok... it's 22:30. This is me going to bed early... I'll aim at 22:15 tomorrow.

Wow there's lots going on!

BDH that's great news, bet it's a weight off your mind? What happens next?

Weaver what a nightmare for your family They have no qualms these rags! I hope things calm down soon. Glad to hear your DD made some progress.

I'm feeling a bit more positive about work. I'm getting more confident and getting on with things which is good. Very tired tonight which is making me feel a bit down but generally I'm better. Did I tell you guys I've lost lots of weight? I got to my target last week! I am finally a healthy weight for my height (first time since 2000!). I definitely feel better for it.

My day has been deeply unproductive. I managed a small workout and ordered myself a sewing magazine DH might have left his credit card lying unattended then DH needed picking up from the car place - some issue with his company car needed sorting and then dropping off again later at the car place. Meant nothing got done really...

I had DD off school today. We have had a chat about autism and what it means. We also did some baking and went out for breakfast. I'm exhausted though. A full week of 9-5 along with the stress has totally broken me.

MrsNutella, he's three so pretty young to get a diagnosis but I was so sure so I just kept pushing 'til the health visitor basically told me she was sure I was wrong but could tell I wasn't going to shut up.

Faith, he's being referred for speech and language therapy both to help with turn-taking etc. and because his speech is quite unclear. I think they'll also write to his nursery to recommend they get in touch with...someone (they gave me a lot of information in a short space of time and I've forgotten some of the details ).

Weaver, I've only just read your comment. I'm so sorry. That sounds awful.

We have my brother's wedding tomorrow and I'm trying to remember everything we'll have to take. It will involve an overnight stay so there are things like the boys' light shows for bedtime that are not obvious.

I've bought tonnes of food because we'll be away for four meals and there's no guarantee the boys will like any option whilst we're there. I've had to make sure it's not stuff that needs to be refrigerated so loads of pancakes, waffles, dry cereal, crisps etc...

BDH lots of lists! I find making notes as I go works well to help me remember most things I always forget something obvious like my pyjamas or deodorant or similar
FX it all goes smoothly! Did you buy new shoes?
I have been told that "no-one will diagnose a child under 6/7". By people that have nothing to do with autism/ADHD. It's annoying. I think the biggest problem we have is that we manage DS well. We know his limits and for our own sanity we don't test them although he tests ours all the Fing time

Plus kids start school here the year they turn 6. That's why diagnosis is later here. Why do they prefer to wait until there is a definite problem? Argh! DS is 4 and we aren't pushing for a diagnosis but I want one at some point so that we can manage whatever it exactly is and he can have a more successful school life.

I'm really impressed and pleased for you that you made a fuss and got the answer you knew was right for your child.

Panic attacks all day, now bed as I cba with staying awake any longer and they've exhausted me, autism and all the shit that goes with it really just sucks, had a good couple of days and now it's like no you may not enjoy life! /rant

Oh bubbles I know that feeling. Hope it passes soon.

Weaver I hope you can get some rest.

BDH that sounds positive! We chat about autism casually - it helps that Abigail has been at pre-school with a boy who has quite significant difficulties due to autism. She got frustrated by his behaviours at times and I explained that he doesn't understand the rules like most people...I hope the wedding is a positive experience.

I had DD's school home visit today. I told the teacher about my autism (she looked quite surprised!). I said about my queries about DD - still not sure - and she essentially said they will bear it in mind and keep an eye on her. She was a monkey before they came and horrendous again at bedtime. Do other people experience bedtime difficulties with kids? Any tips?!

My first proper day in the nursery yesterday. It was great. Everyone is lovely and made me feel like I belonged. The kids were brilliant. I had one little boy telling me how a giraffe had bit his dads leg

bubbles and weaver I hope today is better for you both.

Oh yay HRF I'm so glad it went well! So, so pleased for you!

Thanks all a decent sleep and an bath with a tonne of Epsom salt in this morning, has made day start much better then yesterday's!

Yay HRF glad it went well! 🎉🎉

We have people here this afternoon. They've just arrived and instead of going out to greet them I'm hiding in the kitchen.... I'm tired. I'm not really in a peopling mood....

My weekend went from bad to worse. Drove down to pick up DH from work then go up to our church for tea. (They have a cafe on Fridays before the kids clubs start and the food is awesome) and my car stalled at lights and wouldn't turn back on. It was about 3-4 minutes of hazard lights, beeping horns, a full on meltdown from DD, a meltdown from me, sobbing down the phone at DH and a lot of prayer until it finally started again. I got as far as church and we had tea but when we came out the car is totally shot and won't start.

Luckily we weren't the last out and several people stopped to help us. A friend dropped us home but we have two events tomorrow we now need lifts to as it's an hours walk and DH can't manage it. We've got a lift in the morning but not for the evening. I will need to ask and I bloody hate doing that.

I'm thankful the car is safe and the garage we use only 5 mins drive away so hopefully they can get it or we can get someone to tow us up. Just really need it fixed asap as I need to get to work and I've got 3 appt for me and DD this week that I can't miss.

It's also 4 years today since my mum died. Bad timing isn't even the word.

bdh Hope you enjoy the wedding

nutella I've totally done that before now.

hrf so glad you are loving it. I think it's going to be great for you and the kids.

It was ok in the end. They have one quite calm child most look calm next to my raving screaming banshees DD who is almost three and has been out of nappies for a year managed to wet herself about three times in the space of 2.5hours. A clear sign it was too much for her.
DS was just mad and got madder.

Afternoons are not my favourite times for doing things with the kids.

But bizarrely I kind of enjoyed it. I got to speak to the mum a bit more and she was really lovely! Even when I mentioned the phosphate thing about DS she was totally on the ball about it and did look at me like I was trying to suggest DS has green skin or something.
It was all I could do not to let my eyes pop out of my head.

I didn't realise she is a nurse! She works in kidney dialysis. I was just, wow, honestly!

I suppose what was nice was they took the kids craziness and didn't bat an eyelid. They were both really calm.

Bubbles hope your day continued on the up.

Weaver that is definitely a nightmare scenario with the car. I'm glad you have some of your lifts sorted. I hope you find return lifts and it all goes smoothly for you.

I'm trying to get to bed earlier. It's only 22:10 and I am in bed. Now putting down the phone. Night all!

My bil is going to have a look tomorrow apparently. He thinks it may be the fuel filter. I hope it is because we already have one of those and it's an easy fix.

good morning.
I think this working full time thing is going to take a while to get used to. I was exhausted yesterday and I'd only done one day in the nursery.
I even decided I was going to be brave and not mask as much as I usually do (still did mask a bit. It's hard not to when you've been doing it all your life) and they still accepted me. I flapped and made noises and everyone was perfectly fine with it.
I think it helps when they've dealt with children with special needs. You become more accepting of others quirks and differences.
I'm working in 3s room. So I have the children between 2 and 3. The ones who are less confident stay in transition room until they are ready to come to us. They move to preschool room either the term they turn 3 or the September if they are less confident.
I love this age. Dd would be in this room as she has selective Mutism, so they'd keep her until September. Then DS2 would come to us in September as he is very confident and talkative and is even potty trained. So I'm working with children the same ages as my own. Which I love. I love the older toddler age.

Oh Weaver, what a crappy time you're having

Fatty so glad it's going well, my favourite ages are toddlers and teens!

yay it went to well HRF
Weaver hope your car gets fixed ok.

I spent far too much in the steam summer sale this weekend so I'm having a much better day, although a v expensive one!

I've not dared look at steam sale. My account has over 200 games and I've played about20 Most are humble bundle purchases to be fair where I want one game but by default you get a bunch.

In good news our car is fixed. DH fixed it in the end, it was the fuel filter. I was super proud.

hrf I found it has been harder than I expected to adjust to a full time week but I'm doing ok. We have kept the last couple of weekends clear so we can veg out and recover until we adjust. DH understands it's hard for us both which really helps.

I've many appointments for DD this week. Two follow ups and one initial appt (but I don't think that one will need a follow up) and I've a letter about being refered into someone who will put all the reports together. Hoping I can get the piece of paper by September which will be a year after initial referral.

My account has over 200 games and I've played about20 Most are humble bundle purchases

Same I have to sit on my hands these days when there's a Steam sale!

I'm a bit behind but there was a discussion on sleep - look up Delayed Sleep Phase Disorder (DSPD) - I know it ends up getting a bit ridiculous with a disorder for this and a disorder for that but again it's supposed to be quite highly correlated with ADHD and possibly ASD as well. I wouldn't be surprised because no matter how often I get up before 7, I will never not see anything before 9am as early. If you listen to some pious MNers this means I must be completely nonexistent and/or the biggest layabout in the world.

Weaver hooray for car fixer

Yes to taking time to recover from working full time