Neurodiversity support thread for women with suspected, diagnosed or self-diagnosed autism, ADHD and other NDs #18

[PolterThreadStarter]

As usual, latest support thread.

Welcome

That sounds difficult to come to terms with.

Do you know where you "fall short" of the criteria (so to speak)?

so sorry that you have had such a difficult process for an answer that feels wrong.

does not meet the diagnositic criteria is one of my worries for dd especially.

though more likely to be applied to me as I have learned to muddle through.

@JessicaJoans

Does your clinician specialise in women?

I remember I was so worried that I wouldn't meet the criteria, but I did. I was diagnosed at the Lorna Wing Centre.

Keep posting for support! You may be able to get a second opinion and diagnosis.

@JessicaJoans I havent posted on this thread for ages but tend to lurk. I just wanted to echo what pps said : please keep posting on here if you find it helpful. It may be you were assessed by someone who doesn't know enough about presentation in women or maybe you really don't meet the the criteria but you still have traits which cause you difficulties, either way you are always welcome on here.

It was awful of them to just give you that outcome without any support or a reason why. If you feel up to it I think you are well within your rights to ask how they reached this conclusion. I know if it was me this information would be a huge help in deciding what my next steps were.

I've been lurking on here for ages. And I've JUST booked an appointment with the GP for referral. I have a list of reasons why I think I have ASD in my Bullet Journal.

JessicaJoans I'm so sorry. I dont know how I will feel if that happens to me.

I've just done the exact same thing today redexpat after deciding to book a GP appointment. I've done all the online tests but the last one made me question it again. I'm wavering between being content that I have enough symptoms to convince myself to feeling like a massive fraud. I've been struggling with depression caused by cripplingly low self esteem lately and I would dearly love to have some answer to it all but I'm just not sure.

Can you ask for a second opinion @JessicaJoans?

Some centres aren't very good at recognising ASC in women. I personally believe it's probably quite unusual for someone to think they have an ASC and not actually have it.

Hello, I'm trying this again as I can hopefully stay on the thread this time. For this who don't know/remember me I was diagnosed ADHD-PI nearly three years ago.

I have finally had DS2 (he's nearly 4 months now) and got an appointment for medication discussion at last, it's in Feb so really will be three years between diagnosis and treatment.

We have had DS1 (age ten) diagnosed too low, he is also inattentive and the doctor was concerned especially about anxiety.

Gosh Jessica that sounds really hard. I'm a bit confused, it was an online diagnosis? Is that a common thing these days? It just doesn't seem right, surely from both ends of the situation - they couldn't really see the whole you, and even if somebody does meet the criteria how do they know it's really them? I definitely think if you didn't feel that you got across what you wanted to say it would be worth seeking a second opinion. And yes absolutely keep posting and maybe contact some of the autism in women organisations?

Was on the thread before this on a different name, but haven't been back in a while.

Feeling a bit down today so thought I would pop back, I wear my antisocialness almost like a badge of honour in my head, I suppose as its better to be like oh I'm a grumpy old mare who doesn't need people vs the reality I'm a confused old mare who doesn't know how to connect to people.
Anyway I'm rambling but it's my birthday today and nobody will say anything... Autism is very lonley isn't it, I wish I could just make friends like the people in movies who can ring a whole bunch of people to go out for coffee, drinks, a meal, cinema etc.

I'm just rambling out loud so apologies! But yeah, why can't I just be "normal" and make friends.

Happy birthday to you,
happy birthday to you,
happy birthday, happy birthday,
happy birthday to you..

Happy Birthday Grumpy

Thank you all, I feel a bit embarrassed about my pity party last night, hadnt gone to bed yet when I posted that and everything always seems a million times worse when your tired.
I've cuddled with my dog and made myself some food and watched some dvds, the world seems less offensive then it did last night, back to my Grumpyself rather then sadself . No movie style let's meet up for a coffee, but hugs with a smelly farting dog who loves me. No more pity party!

Does anyone else take melatonin for sleep?

I think I will pass on smelly farting dogs, or any dogs for that matter...

I am grumpy at NT people who get all stroppy about people not understanding their unclear information. just communicate clearly in the first place. and answer the fucking question asked. if I have said that it is unclear which location it is don't just repeat the unclear name of location, add a bit more detail, or clarify which one it is ffs.

@BlackeyedGruesome or NT people who complain that you're not seeing their point of view, when it seems to me they're equally fucking bad at seeing MY point of view

@firewithfire I sometimes take DS' melatonin. Bloody marvellous stuff! The first time it felt like my brain stopped looking all around and looked in one direction. It really helps ds sleep too.

oh yeah, sometimes it is the so called NT who are the most rigid in their thinking.

no, do not take melatonin. I could not organise myself enough to manage it.

I'm just back from the gp. She was v sympathetic, wrote down everything I said. We agreed that I would talk to a counsellor first to talk through possible outcomes and whether or not I really want to find out.

sounds positive red.

Hi,

I have just asked for Diagnosis (Aspergers/ HFA) and am waiting for a response as there is 'no pathway for referral' where I live.

I am in my late 40's and have struggled for years, more so recently since a change in Team to one with no policies, procedures, or guidelines.

I am hoping to get some support and comfort from this thread. I will read back when I can, but want to say how relieved I am to have found 'my people'.