Neurodiversity thread - for all MNetters who are neurodiverse - ASD, ADHD, Dyspraxia and more.

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Welcome one and all to the new thread. A safe haven for MNetters who identify as neurodiverse, diagnosis or not, and those waiting for assessment. Links available in recent threads. Newbies welcome. We just ask that you introduce yourself

Crohn, that all sounds very stressful. Hope the appointment was okay.

Anna, I hate situations like that but I'd agree with everyone else: just a 'Sorry, we can't make it' is the best bet.

Perfectly reasonable, Laura!

Thanks, Polter.

I just don't think it in any way occurs to them that it might inconvenience other people when they do this.

They have a habit of saying they 'might' come to visit/pop in on the way past etc. 'at some point' but then they never clarify that (despite messages from us asking if they know any more etc.). It's like once the plans are finalised for them they just assume other people must somehow know, too (not at all autistic...).

Oh I hate "might", it should either be yes or no. Might is just shitty!

I have two happy news things today, so feeling quite overwhelmed!

1. Ds1 may have an apprenticeship lined up for when he's 17, and some work experience for two or three days a week in the meantime
2. I had to try on some old jeans (as one of my pigs jumped up at me with my only pair of jeans on and muddied them), and they fit! I've gone from having one pair of jeans that fit, to having three pairs.

Just to be clear, I was wearing the jeans, not the pig!

Today has been tough and I'm shattered.

Great news, Pig!

HRF,

Well, PIL have finally made contact with DH. They're at the airport but aren't sure how to get here so who knows when they might turn up! It seems, they're not staying the night but will be here quite late (10pm or so). At least I have some idea of what to expect now (i.e. no need to make up spare bed but will need to think of dinner - pasta and pesto is fine for a quick/easy meal for unexpected guests right?).

Oh no hrf can you snuggle under a blanket or something for the rest of the day?

My appointment was fine, thanks, just a 5 minute check up once I actually got seen, and so wasn't really worth the time and hassle to get there!

Not really. I have a poorly 8 year old and 2 toddlers of deal with now.
crohn I hate when that happens. Just a waste of effort

HRF, hope it's nearly bedtime for the DC now!

BDH, pasta and pesto sounds fine, and if it's not ok for them, well maybe they'll learn to give you more notice next time

Crohn, I remember those sorts of appointments, massive trek to get there, long wait then pfft it's over.

Feeling completely stressed now! I don't think I can feel any extreme of emotion without it backfiring and making me feel shit. I know this happens with ds2 as well. We had a senco meeting tonight, it went very well, ds2 was happy, but then cried all the way home!
Got to go in again tomorrow morning to see someone about dd, apparently there has been an incident today, on top of other incidents (crying, being rude to teachers, having panic attacks that look like meltdowns ) She has convinced herself she is autistic, I think she's going through a tough time with a slightly controlling boyfriend, she's in yr 10 and there's more pressure, she's being weird about eating. There's always something to sort out!

I don't think I've ever felt so Aspie. I called in sick today because I just can't cope with talking to anyone. I've been working three days a week with one day off in between. My days off are spent running errands that I can't do on my work days, and then the children come home from school (including the possibly ADHD/ASD one, who is making my life a misery), and I have no downtime in which I can recover from my work days. My boss isn't happy. I suspect I am in for a telling off next week, and I don't think I can adequately explain to her how such an easy, low-pressure job could leave me feeling so exhausted and overwhelmed.

I'm sitting here listening to Samantha Craft read her list of Asperger's traits. It's making me cry.

HRF, I hope you and your 8yo feel better today.

Pig, it was just a little before then that my sister was diagnosed because she had managed to mask for years but when the pressure at school was increased at the same time as socialising becoming more complex (because teenage girls aren't exactly easy to be friends with!) she just couldn't cope and her autism became much more obvious.

Wingedthing, That sounds really hard.

Well, I survived through the PIL's visit. DS1 struggled, though. He seemed to suddenly come down with something last night and FIL has a tendency to talk over everyone about whatever he's interested in so the noise was too much for DS1. It was a shame because he normally loves to see PIL but he just couldn't cope and I had to take him upstairs for some quiet.

Since DS1 is off school today and I have a doctor's appointment this morning DH is working from home (otherwise I'd have to push the double buggy to the GP's, which is a good half hour + away, and back and have to deal with both boys in the waiting room etc.).

8 yo still not good. And now the younger 2 have got it too. today is going to be tough.

HRF. Hope everyone recovers soon!

Winged I get where you're coming from. I'm much better off working PT and even so, still have a bad sickness record from getting tired and run down. (Doesn't help that I work with ill people, I'm hoping that will improve when I move to theatres!). Does your boss know/understand about your disability? Sontimes my DH talks about me going back to work FT and it fills me with horror. I just don't know how I'll manage.

Today should be fairly relaxed for us. Taking DD for a trim this morning (she has lots of curly hair that needs tidying up!) then meeting my Dad and nephew for lunch.

I don't have an official diagnosis so it's hard to explain to them why I'm struggling so much. It's only a short term contract anyway so no long term loss (though I doubt it would be wise to ask my boss to be a referee for future work).I committed to it thinking that it would be something I could cope with, but I wasn't considering the impact of intense one on one interactions at work, and insufficient down time in between.

Today was especially hard because yesterday I saw a psychologist to start the process of having my dd assessed. An hour and a half of intense conversation really took it out of me. The mask was definitely slipping by the time I left and I haven't managed to put it back in place yet.

I can't afford to be assessed but I'm thinking I have to find a way. My resilience has been stretched to its limit by recent events and it's really affecting my life.

I feel bad about busting in on the conversation here without really being able to participate . I never know what to say. At least I know there are others here who can relate when I need to bleat about things.

hello everyone. i haven't checked in for a while.

I am in one of my rages. i went to the school's assembly which had the timetable changed so they could do the 2m silence. The HT talked through the silence at 11am and started ours at 11:04. She KNEW is was 11am as she was checking her watch. I am still so angry. It will take me hours to calm down.

Another thing. Has anybody discussed their self-diagnosis with their boss before any formal assessment? I am going to GP next Friday though I fully expect to be laughed at. I would feel like an idiot telling my (very nice) boss I had my suspicions, only for me to be told I'm just an Ass, and not an Aspie.

The reason I'm considering mentioning it is that she has picked up on some of my traits - not self-aware when I'm being aggressive or "spikey". I also have an Excel obsession (which helps in my role), but may come over as a bit odd (but who doesn't love Excel????!). I fucking love my job - it suits me perfectly - and I'd be gutted to lose it.

does anyone have any experience of this?

Afternoon everyone, just place marking

Afternoon everyone, just place marking

Thank you, Polter

It sounds very sensible when you say that but I would find it hard being that open. How did your boss react - was she positive?

Also, did it hamper your career - were you pigeon-holed as a bit of an odd one? I'm worried that might happen. Though I'm sure some may already think I'm a bit odd.

My boss is such a nice person that I'm sure she wouldn't be unpleasant about it. But it's the label that worries me - I don't think others understand it much.

HRF, oh no. I hope it's a short lived illness and that today isn't too hard.

I'm having a bit of an up/down sort of day. DS1 is always hard work when he's ill (DS2 just flops on the sofa and sleeps but DS1 does a lot of complaining/whimpering etc. and demands nonexistent solutions) so there's that.

I also really don't like my GP surgery. The GP today asked if I was coping well with my depression and I said I was probably better than I would be without the ADs but am not exactly coping well and she just asked again as if I'd given the 'wrong' response the first time.

Then, when I said I wasn't getting on with the pill I'm on at the moment and preferred the one I used to be on she mumbled something about them all being the same and entered in the prescription. When I picked it up from the pharmacy it seems to be different but I'm not sure.

I popped into a charity shop on the way home and found nice boots in my size that looks like they've hardly been worn for £5 (although, I'm worried the heels are too high for me). That put me in a good mood but then when I went to pay I didn't realise it was just gone 11 and I talked through part of the silence and felt all guilty about that and having to be shushed by the shop assistant (she was nice about it but I seem to do this every year somehow).