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Neurodiversity thread - for all MNetters who are neurodiverse - ASD, ADHD, Dyspraxia and more.

999 replies

FaithAscending · 09/11/2016 15:33

Welcome one and all to the new thread. A safe haven for MNetters who identify as neurodiverse, diagnosis or not, and those waiting for assessment. Links available in recent threads. Newbies welcome. We just ask that you introduce yourself Smile

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PolterGoose · 27/11/2016 09:11

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thelastwingedthing · 27/11/2016 09:19

HRF when you finish fixing your RL can you come and do mine too please?

I did the whole "withdraw and cry" thing this afternoon at a child's birthday party. 'Twas at a bowling alley with those awful games machines with all the lights and "music". It wasn't quite a meltdown but it was one of those times when a full-on meltdown would have felt quite cathartic. I almost ran out of the place after telling the party mum that I couldn't stay, and had a good cry in the car on the way home.

thelastwingedthing · 27/11/2016 09:21

Cross post with Polter while I fussed over the wording of my post. Totally agree BDH, get it all out. Your family will understand.

rivierliedje · 27/11/2016 09:23

That's an interesting set up Chron
Sorry for your bad day BDH, hope today will be better.
Rosalie yes, right language, wrong country. (I'm going to have to change names at some point. I'm terrible at staying anonymous).

BigDamnHero · 27/11/2016 09:33

Thanks, Polter. It was quite cathartic and things were a bit better after. I even put the boys to bed (DH and I take it in turns so one of us puts the boys to bed and reads stories etc. whilst the other tidies the living room and hoovers) and it was lovely.

However, it's all just started over today. I feel like all I do on here is complain about DS1, which makes me feel so guilty because obviously I love him and I know he only behaves the way he does because he's also struggling. It's not his fault. But he's relentless. If he's not making demands for food/drinks/toys then he's winding up DS2 and making him cry or he's throwing things or he's just sort of screaming/shrieking over and over. It's this constant wall of demands and noise and I can't escape it to calm down because he follows me everywhere so it escalates until I explode.

Just writing this, I've been interrupted half a dozen times.

rivierliedje · 27/11/2016 09:42

Awful feeling of will I do anything at all useful today, or go outside at all, or will I do fa again as per the last few months. I've no energy at all and I have my thesis looming which is making it worse. I've barely done any cleaning at all in months (which is quite disgusting really).

Sorry, rant over

HerRoyalFattyness · 27/11/2016 09:42

winged I'm really good at telling other people what they should be doing. Just crap at doing it myself!

rivierliedje · 27/11/2016 09:44

That sounds frustrating and exhausting BDH

BigDamnHero · 27/11/2016 09:49

Rivier, could you make a very small list of a few things you could manage today just so you feel like you've done something?

Along the lines of: put on one load of washing, tidy one shelf, write one paragraph of thesis.

Obviously, including whatever things you need to do/can manage?

SwearyInn · 27/11/2016 10:02

I'm also struggling to be productive these days. I spent most of yesterday on the sofa - watching rugby as it's one of my very favourite things - but I have so much to do.

I am writing a to-do list today otherwise nothing will get done. It's a very strange brain mode and it concerns me as previously I have got these prior to a depression. I'm also twitching and shaking.

I feel a bit overwhelmed with work as well. There is a perfect storm of deadlines looming and if I don't get a finger out it's going to get messy. So I have the Sunday worries at the moment too

This is my approach to deadlines:

Neurodiversity thread - for all MNetters who are neurodiverse - ASD, ADHD, Dyspraxia and more.
SwearyInn · 27/11/2016 10:02

The picture was supposed to be at the end.

HerRoyalFattyness · 27/11/2016 10:16

sweary good approach Grin It's also mine.
I love rugby league. (And the wigan warriors in particular) but can happily leave rugby union.

rivierliedje · 27/11/2016 10:29

Love the picture Sweary, so very true. I've been panicking about my thesis since June and I still haven't done anything.
I've just realised that I never actually managed to establish a routine for myself/housework etc since moving here/starting this job over a year ago, so that isn't helping either.

I wonder if not being able to get off the sofa should become part of the diagnostic criteria for depression?

Thanks BDH: I do have several lists, but none of it looks doable. We did a list last time at the psychologists and yesterday he had me tick off all the things I had done, which I suppose was good, but didn't feel satisfying for some reason.
Maybe teeny tiny steps for the thesis? Like open word document Grin
and type title?
Buy bread, make dinner, do dishes, make christmas cards, have shower?

PolterGoose · 27/11/2016 10:48

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PolterGoose · 27/11/2016 10:49

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autisticrat · 27/11/2016 11:13

At work I am the epitome of organisation, at home it's chaos.

Same.

My college materials are fucking pristinely organised. For each subject, I have an A5 notebook (for class notes), a sidebound A4 notebook (for working in at home), a top-bound A4 notebook (for things specifically related to my research project), a thin polypropylene ringbinder, for material relating to my current unit, and a leverarch folder, for filing of material from previous units.. These are all the same colour for each subject, so, for example, I can wake up and think "History today - pick up everything blue". (For philosophy, I also have a ringbinder with punched polypropylene gusseted poppered pockets, for the A4 stapled workbooks my philosophy teacher gives out (fucking ten of them so far).) Inside my class ringbinder, I separate out all stapled handouts etc. and place each sheet in a separate punched pocket so I can read multi-page handouts without removing them from the pockets. The sections in my ringbinder are split by polypropylene extra-wide dividers, and are labelled: written class notes; handouts; assignments; spec; spare pockets. The leverarch is organised by unit.

Each lesson is scheduled on my calendar, as is every draft assignment date and final submission date.

I am a fucking paragon of organisation and I see my friends getting into the lesson and pulling out a sheaf of random paper from their handbags and wonder how in hell they get anything done.

My house, meanwhile, looks like something out of a hoarding documentary and is filthy with it. I have a bath at most twice a week, because it takes ages and because I forget (and also sometimes DP is washing the bins or something in it). I regularly forget my meds, meals happen when I'm hungry and are generally snack foods - protein bars, peanut butter on crackers, cereal etc. I frequently run out of clean shirts, trousers, underpants or knickers. I can't find anything - I have a complete record of my psychiatric notes covering a decade from age fifteen, and I haven't seen it for years. I can only hope it's still in the house somewhere as it's very private. There is black mould in the kitchen and bathroom and there is food on the kitchen floor. Hoovering doesn't happen because there is no floor visible in a lot of the house - I quite often fall over because something's ended up in one of the narrow paths through the chaos. My bedsheets get changed every few months. I've lost two of my current pairs of glasses; god knows where. Many of my belongings are damaged because they've been crushed at the bottom of piles of rubbish. The dirty washing-up covers the whole cooker-top (there's only just over a square foot of kitchen counter free for food prep) and fills the enormous ceramic sink, most of the time, so meals have to work around that since if nothing's clean and the cooker isn't accessible we have to have something cold. I do my college work lying on the bed because there is literally nowhere else i could lie a notebook flat.

It's not ideal.

But my college work soothes me. It's tidy and it makes sense.

autisticrat · 27/11/2016 11:16

Thanks, Faith and Rosalie Cake[tea]Smile

autisticrat · 27/11/2016 11:23

Sorry, Brew

autisticrat · 27/11/2016 11:28

It's like, there's so much to do in the house that I sir in the sofa doing none of it, not even laundry or washing-up - DP does that. He did teach me how to use the washer dryer, and it has a sticker on to show me each step: Programme 6 (40°C) - Rinse - Spin - Programme 13 (180min). The extra rinse and spin is for my benefit so that my clothes aren't itchy or scented Grin

rivierliedje · 27/11/2016 12:28

Nothing is working: the lightbulb in the bathroom has gone out, but I cant get the lampshade off to change the lightbulb, I got a new ipod for my birthday (months ago) and want to transfer the music from my old ipod on to the computer and onto the new ipod, but I can't get it onto the computer, I need to register for an exam, everything going well, but trying to upload the scans of my ID isn't working as it's the wrong size apparently, but definitely not too big

Trying to tidy up a house is overwhelming Rat, I don't go in to my 'study' at all, unless it's to dump more paperwork there

autisticrat · 27/11/2016 12:33

It really is, rivier!

Today I have:
Put on comfy, indoor clothes (PJ bottoms, hoodie, no bra Grin
Checked FB, MN and Twitter
Had three cups of tea!
Square of no-added-sugar chocolate for breakfast (am diabetic, because of the olanzapine I took long-term)
Low carb protein bar for lunch
And today I am going to write a short feature for my local free mag about the organisation I'm part of.

W00t.

autisticrat · 27/11/2016 12:34

Good luck for the exam :) When is it?

PolterGoose · 27/11/2016 12:37

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SwearyInn · 27/11/2016 12:38

I find tidying overwhelming. I need to make a to do list. I then make chart with the x-axis being "urgent" and the y axis being "important" and split it into 4 quadrants; not-urgent, not-important (this is usually empty), not urgent but important, not important but urgent, then urgent & important.

I can then prioritise the urgent/important tasks. this works for my job too

I don't do it every time, just when i'm feeling totally snowed.

PolterGoose · 27/11/2016 12:44

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