That annoying guest - what is their christmas crime?

[MrsWhites]

So everyone has a guest or someone in the family if you don’t host who will do something seemingly innocent that will piss everyone off? Who is yours and why? I’ll go first -

My sister because she uses all the gravy and doesn’t get off her arse to go and make more! No matter how much gravy we put out she will always use most of it! It’s got to the point now where we put the gravy boars furthest away from her so everyone else gets a go first!

Asparagus? That's hilarious. I mean, I sort of get it with things that most people probably have on hand like "ketchup" or "bread", but did he think everyone just had some asparagus going in a steamer at all times...? Brilliant.

I was looking for this sort of comment! PMSL here!

My 24yr old ds does this but will only eat the leftovers on my plate, no one elses. 😂

A bit petty, I know, but I have an older relative who insists on turning my loo roll round because "Hettie doesn't know the correct way to put a loo roll on a holder"

My BIL and his exW used to do that, not even just at Christmas, any odd Sunday would do. They both worked full time no Cs, DH worked full time, I did part time and we had 2 DCs and were short of money!

😂
Omg , how long does she stay? Hope only for lunch.

I’d be murderous if someone asked for ketchup after I’d spent hours cooking a lovely Christmas dinner for everyone.

My mum who the minute anyone says they're hungry, starts cooking a mountain of food even if the main Christmas dinner is only 20 mins away - last year's defrosting of Bolognese to give to the kids, with pasta and garlic bread, half an hour before we were sitting down to the roast is particularly memorable. Then comments loudly why none of the kids eat anything and that they are poor eaters.

My MIL who in the 18 years I've known her has never once brought a thing, never once offered to help and never once commented positively on anything -its become a bit of a joke in the family just to how lazy and rude she is.

And this is really petty but my sister's family - you call them to table, saying food is ready and they all just hover around the table looking awkward until you tell them for the 30th time to please help yourself, the food is getting cold!

Sitting there doing bugger all, not offering to lift a finger.

I do this 🤦‍♀️ but I would never ever have the poor breeding to comment on it. It’s just between me and the loo roll in a private moment.

Drives me irrationally wild when loo roll is the ‘wrong’ way round.

Yes. 100%.

"I prefer guests with manners, so it seems neither of us is getting what we want today", then change the subject and talk to someone else.

Most of my lot are feral in some way but they tend to at least not do things that are offensive to anyone particular.

My mother, who I love wholeheartedly, can't ignore a fault in something - never picks fault with something like cooking or someone's presentation of something, but let's say a cheese said it was strong flavoured and doesn't entirely blast her socks off - several hours of occasional 'well I don't know, apparently my taste buds have packed up' type comments.

Dad can't just sit and relax, he'll find something to tidy, put away, rearrange, prepare, check on, stir, or plan for. Or fall asleep.

DH will either decide something fucking bizarre needs doing NOW on Christmas eve while we're trying to get everything ready for Christmas day (cleaning the gutters or resealing the bath), or he'll loudly point out something we missed while cleaning once the house is full of guests. And yes, that does include the bits he cleaned himself.

One of my uncles will tell us he's working or on call, promise to drop in if he can after 4, then turn up halfway through dinner and insist he's not hungry and go and sit in the living room on his own until we've finished.

And MIL goes full Mrs Doyle. 'Can I get you a drink? Are you sure? I could make tea. Or open a bottle of wine? Are you sure you don't want tea? It's no trouble.' And if you say yes to tea just to make it stop? All you do is open the door to the biscuit selection and whether you just want a biscuit or are you hungry? Because if you're hungry then I could make sandwiches...' 😆

My husband who will pour big glasses of his homemade Baileys and give them to everyone on arrival when I’m making tea and coffee… this is whether you want it or not and is like some kind of test ( lots of whisky in it) he’ll then neck it himself and be ready to sleep before the spread is even in the table…. every time!!!

A few years ago, with a large amount of guests to cater for, I resorted to putting extra gravy in a pyrex jug as I only had one gravy boat. My SIL drew me aside after the meal and told me I needed to buy an extra gravy boat! She would also point out that placemats needed to be cleaned as gravy had been dripped on them. Never a compliment from her about the cooking, just negative comments!

I have two family members - one younger, the other elderly - who have this annoying habit of picking the food from the serving dishes and eating it (while - usually - standing) as I’m bringing it gradually to the dining table.

Regardless of how many times I say (with a smile) things like : let’s all sit down and start eating together .. or - please don’t pick that pig in the blanket /turnip/ potato just yet, not long now, the turkey is being carved .
No improvement.
just two of them. Everyone else can wait.

My SIL drives me crazy, she’ll be up before the last crumb has hit her stomach, cleaning up. I don’t mean clearing plates, I mean she’ll decide the whole kitchen needs a deep clean - I found her pulling the food mixer away from the worktop to clean behind it immediately after Christmas dinner. I’m not manky by any means, she’s batshit crazy.

My mother, who is a heavy drinker, getting increasingly passive aggressive and annoyed if the alcohol isn't offered early enough and her glass isn't refilled fast enough but refusing to help herself whilst making snide comments about the fact that I'm teetotal.

BIL putting on GB news. I’ve blocked it now so shouldn’t happen again.

One memorable Christmas dinner my Dad pointed out that when I last cleaned I'd missed a cobweb on a beam in our dining room.

Thanks Dad.

My BIL and SIL, I have so many!

Have presents shipped to our house from extended family. We were getting presents from SIL’s great auntie to put under our tree for her. So instead of their entire families sending them presents at their own house, they shipped them to ours to put under our three for them. People I’ve never met, having to sign for like 20 different parcels throughout the week to put under the tree.

Then they had their own presents to each other sent to us and proceeded to take over our kitchen wrapping them on Christmas Eve. All this would make sense if they lived abroad or didn’t drive and had to take public transport to ours, but they drive to ours in a massive cargo van! With plenty of space to bring their own presents from home themselves. Signed for, wrapped, all ready to go under the tree or maybe they could open some at home so half ny lounge isn’t taken up by two adults piles of like 50 presents.

Then they arrive empty handed. They come for a good 5+ days (see #4 below), eat 3 meals a day plus snacks plus drinks, and bring nothing! The last year they came, they brought a box of beer (I don’t drink) and 1 packet of crisps. They have never offered to take us out for a meal or to cook, and that time I suggested ordering a takeaway and sending them with Dh to pay for it, Dh ended up taking them to them pub for a drink and still paying for the bloody takeaway himself. 🤷🏻‍♀️

And they don’t f-ing go home. They come on the 23rd with plans to leave on the 27th 😩 and then a couple years ago were just like, we’re having such a great time (using all your wrapping paper and eating all your food!) that we just thought, surprise, we’d stay an extra day. So I was finally all ready for them to leave and they were like, nah, we were just thinking tomorrow would be a better day to head home! Dh was, just like oh isn’t that lovely, they can stay longer! 😳 At that point, I was so broken that I couldn’t even say anything.

I got cancer 2 years ago though and now I refuse to host anyone for Christmas and I don’t think we’ve seen them since. And it’s been great. 😂

MIL does this. She absolutely troughs food at unbelievable speed. I strongly suspect she has an eating disorder because she borderline starves herself when left to her own devices and takes any opportunity to talk about her weight and how little she weighs. But when food appears in front of her, she inhales it and is often finished before some have even started. I find it so vulgar.

She also complains of being freezing all the time (probably because she is skin and bones) and so the house has to be tropical, which the kids and I cannot bear and makes us all irritable.

OP my fil empties the gravy boat on to his plate so now I make sure I have a hidden back up gravy supply that I only produce when he’s emptied the first, dummy one.

Gravygate is a real issue it seems.

My MiL who scrapes and churns and mashes everything on her plate into a disgusting swampy mess. She spends the whole meal moving food around, building little hills, mashing them down, building another.

What is it with all these people who think they’re the only person eating? Do they never stop to think it needs to be shared with others?
Ditto people who see a bowl of, say, pigs in blankets, and pile their plate up so then there isn’t enough for one each for everyone else.