Page 7 | Jewish Orthodox mum AMA

jewishorthomum · 2023-04-26T13:02:22+00:00

I'm a 29 yr old Jewish Orthodox religious mum of 2 little boys. Is there anything you'd like to ask about Orthodox Jewish life? Kill my time whilst I'm waiting to be called in for an appointment. (When I get called in for my app I'll have to run but will try respond later if there are questions.)

dittbtdity · 26/04/2023 18:13

EllaDisenchanted · 26/04/2023 16:46

@MyFaceIsAnAONB Jews can almost always spot a wig lol.

there are some Jewish wig makers (sheitelmachers) who cater for clients who need wigs for medical reasons in America. I don’t know about uk but I don’t think they would have any objections

It's not just the wigs that give it away, it's also the clothes, shoes, and sometimes the pushchairs, children and laden with carrier carrier bags.

Which brings me to my question, why do frum men (usually it's the men) carry plastic supermarket bags with their belongings?

pompei8309 · 26/04/2023 18:13

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

EllaDisenchanted · 26/04/2023 18:14

@JeweyJew nope!

JeweyJew · 26/04/2023 18:14

Chloe84 · 26/04/2023 18:05

Very interesting, thanks.

How do you view the Palestine / Israel conflict?

It masquerades as a conflict over land but in truth it's religious. Muslims will never accept Jewish sovereignty over what they perceive as Muslim land.

EllaDisenchanted · 26/04/2023 18:14

@dittbtdity because they need a style update!
no idea, no religious reason

dittbtdity · 26/04/2023 18:16

muckandmerriment · 26/04/2023 17:38

yes there are lots of female rabbis, Baroness Julia Neuberger is a well known one in the UK for example.

Show quote history

Religious communities don't have women rabbis, only reform / liberal non religious Jews accept women in those roles.

JeweyJew · 26/04/2023 18:17

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Spare us your sympathy. We received the Torah in Mt Sinai and ever since it has been passed down father to son through the generations. I know about this because I heard it from my father who heard it from his, all the way to the few million Jews who actually witnessed it.

EllaDisenchanted · 26/04/2023 18:17

@Parkingt111 yes we go mikva (ritual bath). Some are really beautiful. I love it in winter when nightfall is early and I can go chill in the bath there for an hour plus and miss the supper/bath time rush! (I like my kids I promise)

Betaalpha · 26/04/2023 18:17

Thank you op. How do you view marriage outside your community? Would you be extremely dissapointed in your child married a Christian for example? What would you do?

pompei8309 · 26/04/2023 18:18

JeweyJew · 26/04/2023 18:17

Spare us your sympathy. We received the Torah in Mt Sinai and ever since it has been passed down father to son through the generations. I know about this because I heard it from my father who heard it from his, all the way to the few million Jews who actually witnessed it.

Show quote history

I’m sure you did 😂

EllaDisenchanted · 26/04/2023 18:18

@fantasmasgoria1 yes, but I am only speaking for myself.

Ortiguilla · 26/04/2023 18:19

Deathraystare · 26/04/2023 17:46

I remember being on a coach holiday and the lady sitting with me was beautiful dressed but my oh my her hair was dreadful and I now realise it was a wig. I found out she was Jewish because she talked to her DIL abut getting home in time to clean out the cupboards etc etc. Like you mention, some women wear nice wigs. I saw a documentary type thing about Jews in this country (UK). One lady had a bob style wig that suited her well. Another woman was buying ready cut pieces of foil which I thought was genius.

I want to ask a question but am not sure how to word it. There is a word for something used so women can take their babies out to the park in their prams. I tis some sort of barrier put up and I remember reading that it made the place look ugly. I cannot remember the name for it though.

Also, just out of interest, what do you eat on the Sabbath? I seem to remember reading about a lot of cold food but I may have got this wrong.

Thanks. This has been fascinating!

Re. the barrier. You mean an 'eruv'. It's like a very high up wire strung between lampposts so that Orthodox Jews can treat everything within the eruv as a home, which means they're allowed to 'ride'. More specifically, this means that people can use wheelchairs and prams. Without the eruv, wheelchair users are not allowed to ride on Shabbat or on other religious holidays.

It has no real visual impact but there has been some backlash against it, motivated by antisemitism, to be honest. The eruvs in North London have been repeatedly vandalised by people with antisemitic intent.

TrudyProud · 26/04/2023 18:19

jewishorthomum · 26/04/2023 14:33

I live in a relatively large Jewish community and honestly if not for the talk from the media about how orthodox women are presumably negatively treated I wouldn't have known to view it as such.
In my community, which is quite intensely religious, (although not chassidic) women work, have careers, hobbies and social events. We are definitely not looked down upon in any way that I can think of.

Is there a specific situation you are referring to?

Women work but do the men? I've watched a few orthodox portrayals and it gives the impression orthodox women work to support the men can concentrate on religion. Is that right?

Mummywarrior · 26/04/2023 18:19

What a great thread. Thank you for sharing.
Are you genuinely happy in your life/religion? Would you like to be able to make friends outside of your community?

Eastie77Returns · 26/04/2023 18:20

AtChoService · 26/04/2023 16:21

Where do the outwardly religious shop? I lived in Stamford Hill for a while and never saw a shop that stocked the wigs or outfits. Most of the women looked the same, with the same wigs and clothes.

For anyone local, the egg stores always fascinated me, last time I went through there it was open as a supermarket but for years I'd never seen it open and always wondered what it was. There was another shop too, at a bus stop in SH, I went in there with my mum once and it was stacked floor to ceiling with boxes of all sorts, an item unboxed on display at the front of the pile. I think they must have sold everything you could ever think of. It was there for years and years, and again I rarely saw it open, but I was sad to see it gone last time I passed.

Show quote history

I regularly walked past Egg Stores on my way to school and up until the age of about 11 I assumed it only sold eggs😭 I drove through Stamford Hill recently and was amazed to see it is still going. I’ve never been inside.

OP, thanks for this thread. Despite growing up in Stamford Hill I understand very little about the Orthodox Jewish community and this is helpful. Are Orthodox men permitted to sit next to unrelated women on public transport?

Chloe84 · 26/04/2023 18:20

JeweyJew · 26/04/2023 18:14

It masquerades as a conflict over land but in truth it's religious. Muslims will never accept Jewish sovereignty over what they perceive as Muslim land.

Show quote history

Thanks, you are non-practicing, it would be good to get OP’s view, as an Orthodox Jew.

JeweyJew · 26/04/2023 18:21

EllaDisenchanted · 26/04/2023 18:14

@JeweyJew nope!

Oh well, was worth a try.

Highly doubt it's Stamford Hill though (but if you are, can I invite you for a Shabbos seudah?).

pompei8309 · 26/04/2023 18:23

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

highfidelity · 26/04/2023 18:23

JeweyJew · 26/04/2023 18:17

Spare us your sympathy. We received the Torah in Mt Sinai and ever since it has been passed down father to son through the generations. I know about this because I heard it from my father who heard it from his, all the way to the few million Jews who actually witnessed it.

Show quote history

JJ - I love how you have phrased this. Thank you.

Pompei -

I consider myself a good Jew even though I rarely attend shul. The religious aspect and teachings of the Torah had little part in my upbringing. And you know something? As an adult, I regret this, being Jewish is such a privilege, and a huge part of Judaism is about preserving the traditions of one's ancestors. I really feel I have missed out on this.

JeweyJew · 26/04/2023 18:23

Chloe84 · 26/04/2023 18:20

Thanks, you are non-practicing, it would be good to get OP’s view, as an Orthodox Jew.

Show quote history

Non practicing? I'm as practicing as they come. Full on Chassidish.

HonorHiding · 26/04/2023 18:23

Thank you for the thread.

What are the expectations regarding age of first marriage for women (and is it different for men)?

If a person doesn’t find a marriage match (perhaps because they are unlucky in the genetic testing, or for some other reason) can they forge a good life as a single person in the community? Or does being unmarried past a certain age carry a stigma?

Apairofsparklingeyes · 26/04/2023 18:25

Is there a religious reason that orthodox Jewish communities don’t have women rabbis?

How do gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgender people fit into orthodox Jewish communities?

Ortiguilla · 26/04/2023 18:28

Chloe84 · 26/04/2023 18:20

Thanks, you are non-practicing, it would be good to get OP’s view, as an Orthodox Jew.

Show quote history

Why is that the only thing you're interested in asking a British Jew?

What religion are you?

Chloe84 · 26/04/2023 18:28

JeweyJew · 26/04/2023 18:23

Non practicing? I'm as practicing as they come. Full on Chassidish.

Show quote history

Oh sorry, I confused you with someone else on the thread. Are you Orthodox too?

Do you agree with the occupation of Palestinian land?

EllaDisenchanted · 26/04/2023 18:29

@Killerqueef I am raising them in my tradition and hope to show them why I believe and practice, and the beauty of our way of life. If they reject Judaism, then naturally, as someone who believes, that would be hard for me. However, my home is and always will be their home. I love my children unconditionally; the choices they make as adults will be theirs to make, whatever that may feel like for me.