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Original poster

To be traumatised by my own undercarriage?!

351 replies

NameChangeLifeChange · 15/08/2022 09:24

As I was wiping this morning it felt a bit sensitive down below which is unusual so I thought I’d have a look and see what’s going on.

WELL

I haven’t looked at my vulva since my second DC was born three years ago and dear god I will never look again. My poor vulva which, let’s be honest wouldn’t have won a beauty contest before but was perfectly serviceable and ‘normal’ looking’, looks like it’s been blended. Or put through a washing machine. I don’t think there is anything ‘wrong’ with it (infection, prolapse etc) but it looks awful. The labia are fine but inside there’s like a squishy circle (?!) that’s all flappy and messy with protruding skin. I actually almost felt tearful and hugely embarrassed that DH has seen it in all its messy glory.

Is this normal?! I’ve had two vaginal births. I don’t have any pain, might get some caneston in case of thrush but I don’t think there’s a medical issue it’s just a hideous mess. I had a smear recently and kind practice nurse didn’t say anything and I assume she would of I’d have had an abundance of genital warts/prolapse.

OP posts:
katesbushh · 16/08/2022 13:30

Oh I'm so glad someone mentioned a dark bumhole. Because I'd noticed this too and it isn't something you can bring up in the staffroom at work.
I too was looking at a pile.

I had 3 sections so thankfully I don't see much of my vag because of my stomach apron hanging over it. Every cloud.
It definitely feels different now I'm 40

DillonPanthersTexas · 16/08/2022 13:32

Oh I'm so glad someone mentioned a dark bumhole. Because I'd noticed this too and it isn't something you can bring up in the staffroom at work.

Well it would make a change from chatting about Love Island

NorthernSoul55 · 16/08/2022 13:34

2018SoFarSoGreat · 15/08/2022 22:20

Now I really want to (don't want to) take a look, but thankfully I'm at work.

It's the post menopausal hair loss that gets me. Nobody EVER mentioned that this happens, and I fully expected to become grizzly gray or white, but not to have... I don't know - a monk's tonsure? There remains hair in all of the inconvenient bits, and on the sides, but there is a large swath of totally bald - shiny bald! - skin in the middle of my mons - where it used to be copiously curly. What? How did that happen? I seriously spent many, many long minutes contemplating what might have rubbed the hair off.

Blad. Bald and probably horribly ugly. I'm a little sorry that I lost all of that weight and can now see it all again. Only consolation is that the thing works for all the things it should, so I guess I'll keep it and be grateful.

I'm a fellow baldie. I think that hair has migrated to my chin....

RudsyFarmer · 16/08/2022 13:35

DillonPanthersTexas · 16/08/2022 13:32

Oh I'm so glad someone mentioned a dark bumhole. Because I'd noticed this too and it isn't something you can bring up in the staffroom at work.

Well it would make a change from chatting about Love Island

😂

OriginalUsername2 · 16/08/2022 13:39

Thank you so much for this thread 🙏

I also have a punched lasagne/ badly packed kebab that I’ve always been too scared to ask anyone about. I feel better!

imisscashmere · 16/08/2022 13:41

DillonPanthersTexas · 16/08/2022 13:32

Oh I'm so glad someone mentioned a dark bumhole. Because I'd noticed this too and it isn't something you can bring up in the staffroom at work.

Well it would make a change from chatting about Love Island

I’m crying! 😂

Gufo · 16/08/2022 13:50

I have lichen schlerosus and needed a repair op after getting stitched wrongly (I know) after delivering 9lb baby1.
At my annual December check up, I put the locum right off his Christmas dinner.

Festoonlights · 16/08/2022 15:22

Well the good news is that the menopause comes along and dries it into a shrivelled, dried out prune that needs a wrench to prise open and a determination of only the very desperate.

LizzieSiddal · 16/08/2022 17:28

Festoonlights · Today 15:22
Well the good news is that the menopause comes along and dries it into a shrivelled, dried out prune that needs a wrench to prise open and a determination of only the very desperate.

No, please don’t put up with this! Get to the GP and get Estradiol- it’s a blooming miracle and restores the plumpness and makes everything moist again! Also stops leaks!! 🤣

LilacSky95 · 16/08/2022 17:44

Well the good news is that the menopause comes along and dries it into a shrivelled, dried out prune that needs a wrench to prise open and a determination of only the very desperate.

I am genuinely looking forward to this

Tessabelle74 · 16/08/2022 18:02

I get you! Mine is wonky and my clitoris has all but disappeared after a third degree tear and manual placenta removal. The doctor who stitched it did it with his eyes shut I'm sure! Trust me though, if your husband is seeing your bits, all he's thinking of is sticking his bits in there, he doesn't care what it looks like, and as for the practice nurse, there's no 2 the same so no need to worry there either 💐

Namechangeforthe · 16/08/2022 18:02

LizzieSiddal · 16/08/2022 17:28

Festoonlights · Today 15:22
Well the good news is that the menopause comes along and dries it into a shrivelled, dried out prune that needs a wrench to prise open and a determination of only the very desperate.

No, please don’t put up with this! Get to the GP and get Estradiol- it’s a blooming miracle and restores the plumpness and makes everything moist again! Also stops leaks!! 🤣

+1 for the magic fanny cream. Game changer.

moksorineouimoksori · 16/08/2022 18:24

More women should look at their vaginas! It's an important part of the body that, over your lifetime, you'll probably get a fair amount of use out of. And it might go some way towards helping accept in yourself what it looks like too, if you happen to be insecure about it.

LindsayStauffer · 16/08/2022 18:28

moksorineouimoksori · 16/08/2022 18:24

More women should look at their vaginas! It's an important part of the body that, over your lifetime, you'll probably get a fair amount of use out of. And it might go some way towards helping accept in yourself what it looks like too, if you happen to be insecure about it.

Agree. It’s good to be familiar with what’s normal for your vulva so you can get checked if something changes. Things like vulvar cancer exist, as well as things like skin infections, prolapses, certain STIs and so forth. I can’t imagine not having a good look and familiarising myself! It’s a part of your body to care for like anything.

wetpebbles · 16/08/2022 18:55

Urh, just reminded me I went for a smear and had tidied up my bikini line, it wasn't until I got home i had a "look" and discovered a thousand hairs sprouting around my bum hole, I laugh about it now haha

BRDouble · 16/08/2022 18:59

This reply has been withdrawn

Withdrawn at poster's request

Iloveringos · 16/08/2022 19:00

Butteryflakycrust83 · 15/08/2022 10:01

Oooh this happened to me a few weeks ago. I had a good ol look and it was like there was something between my urethra and vagina? It grossed me out and i am sure it wasnt like that before. Add to that sparse pubes everywhere apart from my bikini line, Peter the Pile hanging out my bumhole and labia that look like a wrinkled ballbag.

Husband absolutely gives no hoots!

I had a c section so I cant even blame a vaginal birth!

Honestly, I would forget about it!

Peter the Pile 🤣🤣🤣

BRDouble · 16/08/2022 19:05

Thank you so so much for this!!! It’s actually bizarre that this has been posted at the exact same time I also plucked up the courage to have a look down below for the first time since my first DS was born 8 months ago. I’ve had no pain, DH says it looks no different (outwardly) and sex is better than before. But…a couple of days ago I had a look and have been conjoring up all sorts in my head. What you’re describing about the protruding flaps of skin just inside the entrance is exactly what I can see too, it was like some sort of alien creature thing but obviously on a tiny scale! Thank you so much for posting this and for everyone’s replies. I even made a GP appointment this morning so they can have a little check and will still go to be reassured. Why are we not briefed more about things like this? It could save a whole lot of worry and anxiety

Vapeyvapevape · 16/08/2022 19:15

@Gufo I've got lichen sclerosis too just to add that extra soupçon of gorgeousness.
Theres also something amiss with the inside - I had a smear last week and even with buckets of lube it was agony 😞
Good job I don't have a partner because there is no way on earth I could tolerate sex , it really has put paid to me even hoping I'll meet someone , makes me feel a bit sad actually .

Mimilamore · 16/08/2022 19:19

What about bum holes? Nobody mentions that. Lingering piles and leakage... so glam, never the same post babies

Doggate1 · 16/08/2022 19:22

I have only recently joined and


  1. not laughed so much in forever

  2. dashed upstairs to find mirror and phone (for torch)

  3. now drinking wine

  4. 🙈🤣🤷‍♀️😱💥😝🤣😶

Mimilamore · 16/08/2022 19:23

Oh and mine looks like a crimped Cornish pasty between bum hole and fanny, I'm sure a gathering stitch was used

ancientgran · 16/08/2022 19:24

When I had a check up with my GP after my first was born, he looked at my episiotomy and said, "Did the doctor who stitched this have a personal grudge against you." That summed it up really well.

Tessie87 · 16/08/2022 19:24

Well hi everyone…I’ve just found my people! 😂

Vecnasnurse · 16/08/2022 19:30

I had my first 2 dc in Greece where they give you a '4 o'clock' episiotomy whether you need it or not. They cut me on opposite sides for each dc, so I had 2 diagonal cuts running away from the opening complete with flappy bits. Third dc was born in UK and I tore straight down through the perineum. If you ever saw me sneeze while naked, you'd think a demogorgon was snapping at you.