How do you catch a hedgehog?

[YesitsBess]

This prickly butthead is Jumanji, she/he visits every night to eat all the cat food and, if you're stupid enough to be sitting outside with your shoes off, attack your -worms- toes.

Usually we just greet each other of an evening, however the last couple of visits I've noticed she has something around her neck, it's like blue plastic. It isn't stopping her eating or behaving normally - yet. But ideally I'd like to get it off of her.

Unfortunately she is very fast (hedgehogs can run and it's hilarious) and I don't have a trap.

Any ideas? She's sat opposite me munching a slug at the moment so I don't think she's is imminent danger.

@Billybagpuss

You are a girl who knows where her towel is.

A real hoopy frood.

Awwww... Well done. Hope you get the plastic off OK.

I may put her on my lap and become a Bond villain.

🤣🤣🤣

There is literally NOTHING I don't love about this thread.

Well done, @YesitsBess!!

She's been confined to the bath (in her box and the door is shut) because she is a sneaky hedgepig.

Message to partner (who may be quite pissed as he's celebrating):

Me: Jumanji is in the bath so don't freak out if the bathroom smells of fish biscuits for no reason and you hear snorting.

Him: What is in the what now?

Me: THERE IS A HEDGEHOG IN THE BATH. WILL EXPLAIN TOMORROW.

No reply as yet.

Happy update is: apparently our local vet is also hedgehog mad, and as the ring hasn't fallen off of its own accord I don't want to force it so she's off there tomorrow morning which will also save her a stressful car journey further afield.

@GreeboIsMySpiritAnimal

There is literally NOTHING I don't love about this thread.

Well done, @YesitsBess!!

Love you right back

@NeverDropYourMooncup

I have never been on a thread that your presence hasn't made better!

42

A hedgehog is stuffing its face right now, in our feeder!

Noisy bastards aren't they?

I hope it goes well with the vets tomorrow.

I'm concerned she will escape the box and hurt or exhaust herself escaping the bath.

We have 3 hedgehogs in our back garden, and they’re all called Sonic. We need to change up the naming conventions- you’ve inspired me.

Lol - I am not so inventive. Last year, we had 2 residents - blonde face and brown face, for the different coloured hair round their faces!

@HeartvsBrain

I am so glad that this little lady has you as her guardian angel. But I have one word of warning, she might be in an even worse mood after she is relieved of her decoration, she might think it looks really pretty, and it may have taken her ages to get it placed exactly right 😜 As a pp has started suggesting names, may I suggest "Millie" after Spike Milligan, because I believe that he could be quite grumpy, as well as being very funny! 💐 for you x

One of my favourite poets.

Ahem:

I eat peas with honey,
I've done it all my life,
It makes the peas taste funny,
But it keeps them on the knife.

I've had great joy out of him and A.A. Milne, and now so do my children!

Jumanji couldn't care less. She's eating her own bodyweight in snacks at the moment and probably considering sending a complaint to Pam Ayers about her awful treatment this evening.

@YesitsBess

She's been confined to the bath (in her box and the door is shut) because she is a sneaky hedgepig.

Message to partner (who may be quite pissed as he's celebrating):

Me: Jumanji is in the bath so don't freak out if the bathroom smells of fish biscuits for no reason and you hear snorting.

Him: What is in the what now?

Me: THERE IS A HEDGEHOG IN THE BATH. WILL EXPLAIN TOMORROW.

No reply as yet.

Happy update is: apparently our local vet is also hedgehog mad, and as the ring hasn't fallen off of its own accord I don't want to force it so she's off there tomorrow morning which will also save her a stressful car journey further afield.

I just tried to read this whole post out to DH but was laughing so much I basically just wheezed at him.

Love this. Hope the little hog is ok

@RandomMess

I hope it goes well with the vets tomorrow.

I'm concerned she will escape the box and hurt or exhaust herself escaping the bath.

I've had some good advice and she's pretty locked-down. She's in a cat carrier with shredded paper (I sat here for an hour shredding paper by hand on the advice of H8 whilst gently admonishing Jumanji for being a greedy cow and eating all the milk that she's not supposed to eat) which is locked.

She's in the bath as a secondary measure because I've not met many small animals that can escape a bath. The Swan was another matter but we don't talk about that.

She's currently just....eating and drinking. The plastic ring was definitely worse than I initially thought so hopefully she's relaxed and relieved.

Obviously if she does attack my partner when he gets home I'll update everyone.

🥰

This is the best live thread I’ve read in ages, I hope wee Slarty’s vet visit goes well

I love this thread. Jumanjii is lucky to have you!

Our local vets is also hedgehog friendly - I’ve taken one there myself, and when my poor cat had to have an extended stay there was a hedgehog in for lungworm - boy oh boy, the havoc and mess they create in a short space of time! Hella cute, though.

@GreeboIsMySpiritAnimal

You know, when I read it as a quote and pretend it isn't a thing that is actually happening right now, then this is also my reaction.

I have a hedgehog who I’ve named “the spikey little fucker” and my hubby calls him the “spikey terrorist” not very original unfortunately! The reason for the harsh names is because as soon as open our back door to put out food and water for him he charges at me and attacks my feet and ankles! (He’s drawn blood before)!

He would certainly give ussain bolt a run for his money on speed and accuracy! He runs in a perfect straight line aiming for me whilst snarling!

No one ever tells you they have a violent streak! I do bat care and they are a doddle compared to my spikey visitor

This thread is MN at his greatest!

@Chronicallymothering

We have 3 hedgehogs in our back garden, and they’re all called Sonic. We need to change up the naming conventions- you’ve inspired me.

Please name one Slartibartfast. I'd hate to change Jumanjis name now but I need to know that at least one hedgehog has been named Slartibartfast.

@Dogmum40

I have a hedgehog who I’ve named “the spikey little fucker” and my hubby calls him the “spikey terrorist” not very original unfortunately! The reason for the harsh names is because as soon as open our back door to put out food and water for him he charges at me and attacks my feet and ankles! (He’s drawn blood before)!

He would certainly give ussain bolt a run for his money on speed and accuracy! He runs in a perfect straight line aiming for me whilst snarling!

No one ever tells you they have a violent streak! I do bat care and they are a doddle compared to my spikey visitor

Where do you live? Is it possible your spiky fucker is actually Jumanjii…

YesitsBess
I've finally found my tribe, you are "my people" ❤️
Best thread ever, I love hedgehogs, have one in my garden, had babies last year, best year ever