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How do you catch a hedgehog?

352 replies

YesitsBess · 13/10/2021 19:36

This prickly butthead is Jumanji, she/he visits every night to eat all the cat food and, if you're stupid enough to be sitting outside with your shoes off, attack your -worms- toes.

Usually we just greet each other of an evening, however the last couple of visits I've noticed she has something around her neck, it's like blue plastic. It isn't stopping her eating or behaving normally - yet. But ideally I'd like to get it off of her.

Unfortunately she is very fast (hedgehogs can run and it's hilarious) and I don't have a trap.

Any ideas? She's sat opposite me munching a slug at the moment so I don't think she's is imminent danger.

How do you catch a hedgehog?
OP posts:
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Intercity225 · 15/10/2021 11:40

For ages we thought there was only one and then they came together and we realised there were two.

I wonder if they are related!

We have the hedgehog wars over food! For instance, last year, brown face might be feeding at the bowl, and as soon as blonde face came along, brown face ran off - we assumed they had already established dominance, because brown face never took blonde face on, although they looked a similar size to me!

Or, a big male might be eating at the bowl, and another massive male came along and just literally shunted him a yard out of the way!

WatchOutLurkerAbout · 15/10/2021 14:04

Loving the updates! Can't wait to hear how the little tyrant settles in to her new digs.

Baby boy arrived at 4.41am in a thoroughly dramatic fashion lol. He's obviously been listening when I was reading this thread to my husband Grin

YesitsBess · 15/10/2021 14:24

@WatchOutLurkerAbout

Loving the updates! Can't wait to hear how the little tyrant settles in to her new digs.

Baby boy arrived at 4.41am in a thoroughly dramatic fashion lol. He's obviously been listening when I was reading this thread to my husband Grin

AAAAAAAH! WELCOME THE THE PLANET LITTLE DUDE!

Jumanji and I are on the move

How do you catch a hedgehog?
OP posts:
ErrolTheDragon · 15/10/2021 14:51

Congratulations WatchOutLurkerAbout !Thanks

HirplesWithHaggis · 15/10/2021 18:06

Congratulations, Lurker! And thanks for the laughs everyone. Glad Jumanji is on her way.

H8H8H8 · 15/10/2021 18:18

@WatchOutLurkerAbout

Loving the updates! Can't wait to hear how the little tyrant settles in to her new digs.

Baby boy arrived at 4.41am in a thoroughly dramatic fashion lol. He's obviously been listening when I was reading this thread to my husband Grin

Congratulations!

Can I be the first to suggest calling him Slartibartfast?

🤣🤣

H8H8H8 · 15/10/2021 18:20

[quote felinelucky]@H8H8H8 can I just say I'm in awe of your hog wrangling superpowers [/quote]
They are well honed over multiple years of practice 🤣

Redyellowblue34 · 15/10/2021 18:31

@WatchOutLurkerAbout - congratulations 🎉 So pleased for the update.

YesitsBess · 15/10/2021 19:18

A very quick update to say Jumaji is at his (!) sanctuary.

Off to sort dinner...

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DontSettleForMe · 15/10/2021 19:41

I confess when I saw the thread title my first thought was Why would you want to?..but what a lovely thread. I love hedgehogs. So fab that you have rescued Jumanji and he is off for some R&R at the rescue centre.

I’ve been feeling a bit down (broken bone and sorry for myself) but this has properly cheered me up. Especially THERE’S A HEDGEHOG IN THE BATH and him forgetting and questioning why said hedgehog was in the bath Grin

YesitsBess · 15/10/2021 19:53

I hope you're on the mend too.

Have told partner I have to catch the new hedgehog tonight in case it's underweight have set a trap with chicken.

Him: Bess no!

Me: Oh ho ho... Bess Yes!

OP posts:
NeverDropYourMoonCup · 15/10/2021 20:03

@YesitsBess

I hope you're on the mend too.

Have told partner I have to catch the new hedgehog tonight in case it's underweight have set a trap with chicken.

Him: Bess no!

Me: Oh ho ho... Bess Yes!

The sanctuary are going to start looking at you funny.

You're in danger of becoming their official hog supplier. Bit like the Childcatcher, only with Cat food! And fishbits! And toeses!

YesitsBess · 15/10/2021 20:06

Hahahaaaa. Hopefully this one will be OK and I will not become a hedgehog courier service!

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YesitsBess · 15/10/2021 20:52

Jumanji got to his winter residence mostly without incident, and both the vets and sanctuary said they are taking hundreds in at the moment. Which I think is good? People are taking the time to get them where they need to be to be safe?

I did have a brief scare on the journey when my car decided to start beeping incessantly at me for such fripperies as 'screenwash' and 'Some fuel please' which I was happy to oblige until I pulled into a garage and fuel was One Pound Fifty Six.

ONE POUND FIFTY SIX?

I bravely decided to press on, not realising that my sat nav had chosen a route based solely on roads not updated since 1813 and we had quite a bumpy ride. I consoled Jumanji by telling him (!) he'd probably never go this fast again, even if he tried really hard.

The car got more and more beepy and we both arrived agitated but in one piece.

I then embarked on the most bum clenchy journey ever to find some fuel and wheezed into the petrol station on fumes.

I used the time to consider whether to try and encourage people to donate to wildlife places, and thought "nah". I don't want a good thread to turn into an obligation, and many of you are already helping the spiky hate potatoes in your own ways (naming them Slartibartfast obviously being my main choice).

What I would say, maybe, is LOG YOUR HOG! There's a great link on page 10 and it takes about 30 seconds, maybe that way we can get a better idea of how many Pikelets, potatoes and prickly pears we actually have left!

The sanctuary have assured me that when Jumanji is better, they will send some photos, so will add those.

But I'm still very interested in hearing all your hog tales!

OP posts:
userxx · 15/10/2021 21:16

What a fantastic ending to the story. 🙌 🙌

YesitsBess · 15/10/2021 22:02

Without wanting to sound like a massive bellend....

@MNHQ you've put one of my threads into classics, and that's hugely appreciated, but I'd much rather sacrifice that one (which mainly focuses on a pan) and exchange it for this one (which mainly focuses on important Pikelet facts AND A BABY) as a resource that can be called on again?

Smile
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NoSquirrels · 15/10/2021 22:24

@YesitsBess

I hope you're on the mend too.

Have told partner I have to catch the new hedgehog tonight in case it's underweight have set a trap with chicken.

Him: Bess no!

Me: Oh ho ho... Bess Yes!

Grin
NoSquirrels · 15/10/2021 22:26

@YesitsBess

Morning! I will definitely tell the Swan story later on, have to go to work and then pick Jumanji up for her journey to her new pad.

Will she be grateful? Not in the slightest!

Am hoping baby news radio silence means stubborn baby has decided to make his debut...

I’m just not sure you’ll make it into Classics without the Swan Story…

(I’ve seconded- thirded -the nomination, but you should tell the story… pleeease)

NoSquirrels · 15/10/2021 22:27

@WatchOutLurkerAbout

Loving the updates! Can't wait to hear how the little tyrant settles in to her new digs.

Baby boy arrived at 4.41am in a thoroughly dramatic fashion lol. He's obviously been listening when I was reading this thread to my husband Grin

Hooray!

You can name him Jumanjii Grin

YesitsBess · 15/10/2021 22:46

@NoSquirrels

The Swan story (a long time ago) is already in Classics. It got caught up in a huge thread about spiders, but I'm going to try again:

Before I joined MN, I lived on a lovely Islet (it's like an Island but...not) and we had many many wildlife incidents.

Just before Christmas 2015/16 we'd had a very expensive building (think Summerhouse but a but more fancy) nearly put up.

Whilst the builders were on their holiday break, the worst storm that could ever happen...started happening. On the same day, an unseasonally late signet got blown into power lines over the house.

Initially it seemed annoyed but physically fine, on closer inspection things were worse, it had injuries but thought it was fine and decided to remove itself from the downstairs bathroom and cause havoc...

The decision was: it's probably fine, and if I drive it to the wildlife place in this wind, the "summerhouse" may fall down. But it might not have been fine, so I drove the stupid bastard thing to the rescue before they closed for Christmas, my "summerhouse" was destroyed by the wind, my Mum spent her Christmas eve helping me collect bits of it and entertain the kids. And in total, the little hissy bastard cost approximately £16,000! Angry in repairs!

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TaraR2020 · 15/10/2021 23:14

Congratulations @WatchOutLurkerAbout! Star

Apparently there's a Classics Panel that have yet to vote on the nominations this thread has received @YesitsBess Hmm

WelshDaffodil · 16/10/2021 00:19

Got to be Classics, surely? I've been chuckling on and off all day at the Ford Prefect comment alone Grin Glad Jumanji is digging his new digs

ErrolTheDragon · 16/10/2021 00:27

I'm confident this thread is a shoo-in both for classics and Talk Roundup (I nominated first, the reply said it's lovely and that was even before the arrival of Slartibartfast (hog or child)Grin

Redyellowblue34 · 16/10/2021 09:29

How do we vote the thread into Classics?

ErrolTheDragon · 16/10/2021 09:48

@Redyellowblue34

How do we vote the thread into Classics?
We don't, it's up to MNHQ. But unless the usual team has been abducted by aliens, I can't imagine they'll reject this one.