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Original poster

What's the most PFB embarrassing moment you've had?

525 replies

Giantwaterbottle · 31/08/2021 20:46

I remember mine and physically cringe. DS1 is very bright, learned to walk and talk early and had a good vocabulary. So bright and developmentally at the top end (younger DS slower on all counts but both totally normal) but not exceptional.

Being shown round a lovely nursery and I said on more than one occasion how he was "really very smart" and that the doctor had said how clever he was (local GP had said she's very good speech wise and health visitor had said similar.

I cringe so hard every time I think about it. He goes to that nursery and whenever I see the head who showed us around I just think about how much of a wanker I must have seemed 😭😫😆

OP posts:
firstimemamma · 31/08/2021 21:47

Dh meticulously added tiny amounts of hot / cold to baby ds' bath until it was exactly 37 degrees. 36.9 and 37.1 were both unacceptable to him.

HappyMeal564 · 31/08/2021 21:47

I love these 😂

Tee20x · 31/08/2021 21:49

@MamaRaisingBoys

I still cringe whenever my family brings this up (frequently)

When PFB was 6 months old he toppled backwards from sitting and hit his head on the caravan floor. I got down on the floor and hit my own head trying to replicate the sound so I could guess how hard he might have hit it and decide if I needed to take him somewhere to get checked out 🥴 I don’t know what I was thinking! 😂

This made me laugh out loud
gogohm · 31/08/2021 21:50

I'm feeling wholly inadequate, my parenting was just go with the flow. 22 years ago we were a lot more laid back!

shuyajty · 31/08/2021 21:53

@gogohm

I'm feeling wholly inadequate, my parenting was just go with the flow. 22 years ago we were a lot more laid back!
🙄
alphabetspagetti · 31/08/2021 21:55

When PFB was a newborn and I was at the HV clinic or similar, I always complimented other people on what their DC was wearing or similar as, like a PP, I couldn't comment on their actual potato like baby as they were all so ugly compared to beautiful DC1 and I thought their parents would notice my insincerity. Looking back, PFB didn't look like a potato .. more like an amoeba as she was so chubby that all of her features merged.
Perimenopause seems to have swung me from one extreme to the other. I have turned me into one of those batshit old ladies who gaze adoringly at any baby that I ever see and thinks that they are all beautiful.

Ginfilledcats · 31/08/2021 21:57

Oh god I didn't realise this was cringe until people said they did the same and are laughing about it.

I logged (on an app) every nappy change (wet/dirty, heavy wet!), every feed start time and length on each side, every time she fell asleep.
Until she was about 10 months old. Every single one. When my parents t looked after her for the first few times at 10m they wrote everything down and I retrospectively filled stuff in on the app.

Crikey.

Ididanamechange · 31/08/2021 22:00

@3peassuit

I thought my PFB was the most gorgeous baby ever to grace the earth. It was a struggle to resist the urge to hold her aloft in Hammersmith Broadway for all of West London to admire. I genuinely felt sorry for the parents of ordinary babies. After a few months I got a grip.
This was me as well. I lapped up any attention he got from strangers in thr Street and if they happened to just walk past and not Notice him I'd genuinely wonder how my stunning baby hadn't stopped them in their tracks Blush
ELM8 · 31/08/2021 22:01

I also did the feeding / nappy logging. Had a new piece of a4 under my pillow / on the sofa every day with a pen (felt more formal than just doing it on my phone) and would log to the minute the feeding and which boob, with a total for that 24 hours. Also a running tally for each 24 hour period of nappy's and their contents.

I then kept a tally next to it of my various medication / painkillers in case they had an impact.

I presented the health visitor with all this paper and she must have thought I was bonkers Blush

JuliaBlackberry · 31/08/2021 22:01

When PFB was a baby I was lucky that she would sleep reasonably well, a few hours at a time. Not content with this gift, I set an alarm for every hour so I could check she was breathing. I mean wtf was I thinking all that sleep I could have had.
This thread is hilarious I have laughed out loud many times

8lue8ird · 31/08/2021 22:02

@MamaRaisingBoys

I still cringe whenever my family brings this up (frequently)

When PFB was 6 months old he toppled backwards from sitting and hit his head on the caravan floor. I got down on the floor and hit my own head trying to replicate the sound so I could guess how hard he might have hit it and decide if I needed to take him somewhere to get checked out 🥴 I don’t know what I was thinking! 😂

This is quite possibly the funniest thing I have ever read on here 😂😂😂
mynameiscalypso · 31/08/2021 22:05

@Ginfilledcats

Oh god I didn't realise this was cringe until people said they did the same and are laughing about it.

I logged (on an app) every nappy change (wet/dirty, heavy wet!), every feed start time and length on each side, every time she fell asleep.
Until she was about 10 months old. Every single one. When my parents t looked after her for the first few times at 10m they wrote everything down and I retrospectively filled stuff in on the app.

Crikey.

I didn't stop until DS went to nursery at 13 months. I was also the only one with access to the app so I made DH keep note of everything if he was looking after DS so I could log it. It was less PFB with me than my perfectionist tendencies coming out!

We'll gloss over the time I wanted to take DS to the doctors because the eyelashes on his left eye were longer than his right eye.

Chattercino · 31/08/2021 22:06

@Biancadelrioisback I actually cried reading this Grin

BabbleBee · 31/08/2021 22:06

I was breastfeeding DD4 and playing a game on my phone when I accidentally dropped it on her head Blush I was devastated and proceeded to drop the phone on my own head not once, or twice, but three times at different angles to see how much it hurt…

My most embarrassing moment was taking PFB to a very naice baby swim session in a private heated hydrotherapy pool. I was really nervous as I’m not a strong swimmer. I’d gone with my swimsuit on but had kept my bra and breast pads on as I was still quite leaky. Totally forgot about the bra until I spotted one of my breast pads floating away from me. I was absolutely mortified and never went back!

Karmakamelion · 31/08/2021 22:09

gogohm

I'm feeling wholly inadequate, my parenting was just go with the flow. 22 years ago we were a lot more laid back!
Bloody hell I wasn't. I warmed yoghurt gently in warm water, I also felt desperately sorry for those who THOUGHT their infinitely inferior babies where even a patch on my perfect little prince and regularly walked backwards to prevent the sun getting in his eyes...

wonderstuff · 31/08/2021 22:11

@3peassuit

I thought my PFB was the most gorgeous baby ever to grace the earth. It was a struggle to resist the urge to hold her aloft in Hammersmith Broadway for all of West London to admire. I genuinely felt sorry for the parents of ordinary babies. After a few months I got a grip.
I was like this, you fall head over heels in love with them don't you. I felt guilty taking dd to toddler group because she was so much more beautiful than the other babies, it didn't feel fair on all the other mums with quite ordinary, or even slightly ugly babies. Looking back at photos now she wasnt actually as remarkable as I imagined at the time.

I also washed her exclusively in Neal's Yard Organics. We had no money at all!

HalloHello · 31/08/2021 22:13

I carefully wrapped her umbilical cord stump and clip in kitchen roll, and sealed it in a labelled ziplock bag while crying my eyes out as that was the last remaining part of her that was attached to me... Even though I breastfed her until she was 16 months and was a stay at home mum 🙈 only just got rid when I started sorted out her stuff for baby number 2! Will not be doing that this time.

TreeSmuggler · 31/08/2021 22:15

Oh these are sweet!

I went the other way and always keen to show people how "cool" and un pfb I was, so I was always mentioning that my dc wasn't very smart, wasn't cute, etc. I regret it now, if you can't be on a happy cloud of love with your newborn, when can you be. Plus talking like that was cringe in its own way, looking back.

Brieeeeeeeeeeee · 31/08/2021 22:16

Quite late in the day compared to a lot of these but on one of the nursery settling in days, fish goujons were on the menu that day and they asked if DS had tasted them before. He hadn’t, but I’d made smoked mackerel kedgeree from one of those wanky weaning recipe books a few weeks earlier (and he’d eaten a small amount before lobbing it off the high chair tray).

I can hear myself recounting his extensive palate to the nursery manager and cringe at the memory

BunnytheFriendlyDragon · 31/08/2021 22:23

@firstimemamma

I was determined to establish breastfeeding and read somewhere that it's a good idea to log feeds. I took this to the extreme and for about 6 weeks I kept a note of literally every single feed (EBF) he had - even if he was cluster feeding and having 20 feeds a day. Every feed was logged down to the exact minute e.g left boob 3:19-3:37pm. The breastfeeding counsellor at my local support group thought I was mental and told me I didn't need to do it but I didn't listen. I think around the 6-8 week mark it gradually stopped.
DS is over ten weeks old and I'm still doing this on a app... I feel like I don't want to stop.

Great thread!

Brighterblighter · 31/08/2021 22:25

We did a spread sheet with the exact times of new born dd wee and poo, we very seriously showed the midwife, I'm sure I saw her surpress a smile as she looked at it with concern and said it was all good Grin

Mama Grin

Love the walking backwards

BoredZelda · 31/08/2021 22:25

22 years ago we were a lot more laid back!

My nephew is 22. Remembering back to the PFB stage my sister went through “we” most definitely were not.

DD is 12 now. I can’t recall any PFB stuff, but I was a little bit cautious with her because she was premature and in NNICU for weeks. I’m sure people thought it was PFB. We also were strict with nap times, but I think I’d do the same a second time. If I were to pick something, it was probably the first drive home where I sat in the back and had to tell OH to keep stopping because the sun was in her eyes.

MadeForThis · 31/08/2021 22:28

Warmed wipes on the radiator so they weren't to cold when we changed her nappy.
May also have logged feeds and sides.

Oinkypig · 31/08/2021 22:29

Oh god this is embarrassing, I took PFB to the GP as a toddler because he wasn’t listening to me. GP took loads of time testing hearing in lots of different ways. I then asked if it was maybe the fact PFB couldn’t understand my accent as we were in a, still English speaking, but different accent to my country. How that poor GP did not piss himself laughing I will never know, he was so kind.

abw94 · 31/08/2021 22:30

@Ginfilledcats

Oh god I didn't realise this was cringe until people said they did the same and are laughing about it.

I logged (on an app) every nappy change (wet/dirty, heavy wet!), every feed start time and length on each side, every time she fell asleep.
Until she was about 10 months old. Every single one. When my parents t looked after her for the first few times at 10m they wrote everything down and I retrospectively filled stuff in on the app.

Crikey.

I did exactly the same and now thinking back I realise what a waste of effort that was 🤣🤣