What's the most wanky thing you have ever done?!

[lardylegs123]

I cringe when I think of this. First year of university, and I was studying Languages. I'm from a working class, Scottish family and was the first ever to go to university. Mother's Day comes and I thought it would be a nice idea to write out the card entirely in the languages I've been studying I thought mum would be so impressed, but she just looked at me and said 'but Lardylegs, I cannae understand a word'.
I think I was too busy being a pretentious dick, that I'd forgotten about this mere detail

I went to 6 different schools in 6 different parts of the country. Started off in Wales. I remember standing in front of a mirror saying "Eears" instead of "Yers" a million times so I'd fit in with my new friends.... Every other move we made I tried to fit in with my new class mates. Where I live now I have a Welsh neighbour (who I love) and a very 'Received Pronunciation' neighbour (who I also love). My nightmare? Being in the same room with them both. My subconscious brain couldn't deal with the decision of what accent to use....

I did a fucking charm course

@OffRampHilton I did not know that. Thought it standard as I have both a black Visa credit card and a black debit visa from RBS. Off to google now …

'Roof, Goose, Will and Hugs' is the highlight for me on this thread.

Wankiest thing I've done is an interactive art piece where I interacted with members of the public. Makes my toes curl thinking about it.

We live very close to the Yorkshire Sculpture Park, which is a wonderful old country estate, filled with permanent and visiting sculptures. Lots of modern art all around. The permanent collection is largely Henry Moor and Barbara Hepworth, who were both local.

Anyway, the DC have been visiting all their lives and have a precocious appreciation of modern art! .Many years ago, when DS was about 4, I took him to nursery one Monday. The nursery nurse asked him what he’d done at the weekend. He said we’d been to the sculpture park. Nursery nurse asked him if he enjoyed it.
“Yes”, he said, “but I preferred the Miro to the Shonibare”.

[quote LongTimeMammaBear]@OffRampHilton I did not know that. Thought it standard as I have both a black Visa credit card and a black debit visa from RBS. Off to google now …[/quote]
It possibly is. As I mentioned, I’m not British so don’t bank with RBS but can’t imagine cards that happen to be black are all that uncommon. My debit and credit cards from an Irish bank are both black, and my husband’s credit card from a different Irish bank is a really dark grey which could be mistaken for black at a distance.

I’d say they are (or were- this was a good few years ago) uncommon in the States and a black card was a Black Card, IYKWIM.

I did the accent thing- posh parents and I had the thickest cockney accent at uni. When my parents visited people didn’t belittled were mine 🤦🏼‍♀️

I lived in New Zealand for a year and enjoyed a lot of wine there, as well as taking part in a few work-related wine tastings. When I came home, I was at my mum's and she offered me wine. I asked what year it was, and when she told me, I sniffily said "hmm, no thanks"

Thing about it is: kids will do it to fit in. Some adults will do it as they have an ear for languages and can’t really help it. Some are just poncey

The wankiest thing I ever did (and there were many) was to affect writing 'seven' with a french slash. It stuck and I now can't write them the normal English way.

That was my mum, she was an au pair in San Francisco in 1964, picked up using the slash and eventually when she taught me to write my numbers I ended up picking it up and it's stuck to this day (I'm 52 now).

Mum received a cassette tape of family greetings not long before she decided to return home, and she'd been in the US long enough for the family accents to sound far stronger than they actually were. I remember she said she almost didn't recognise them.

I sometimes do the wanky sevens on Things Which Count - because my handwriting is quite bold / elaborate / flamboyant - not deliberately just how after time it works and so sometimes hard to tell the difference between a 1 and a 7 as I write them .

I had not realised that was a wanky thing but quite happy to accept it.

ScottishNewbie

My Eufy is called 'Bert the Dirt'.

@Aboutaugust I like that but it doesn’t rhyme in my accent disappointingly!

We live near to a stately home and an airbase so see the occasional VIP’s driving/being driven complete with police escorts. Yesterday I saw a car heading towards me complete with flags adorning the rear windows “how naice, dignitaries” I thought. As they zoomed passed me it was actually 4 teens in a car with England football flags “chavs” I thought and then rolled my eyes at myself!

My son’s school had a technology ban for a week to try and get the children less hooked on gadgets. DS then aged about 8 was interviewed by local radio and asked what he had been doing instead, most kids having said playing cards, reading books etc, he replied “I’ve been kayaking on my pool at home” (not as grand as it sounds, it’s a big pond), this was followed by stunned silence by the presenter and the Head teacher in fits of laughter.

Tell anyone that will listen that I had my placenta dehydrated and made into tablets like it was some magic potion... meh... hormones 😆

I remember picking DS up from holiday club en route to visiting his GPs for the weekend. I heard him say to the playleaders that it is good fun visiting his GPs as Granny has a big house with a swimming pool and an observatory. She has a bungalow with a paddling pool, and a telescope in her shed.

I said I was most proud of being a mum to three wonderful children. On one of those stupid welcome to the company slots on a newsletter. Everyone else had put stuff about their work achievements in other jobs. This was for working in a nursery.

@3scape

I said I was most proud of being a mum to three wonderful children. On one of those stupid welcome to the company slots on a newsletter. Everyone else had put stuff about their work achievements in other jobs. This was for working in a nursery.

Sounds less wanky than listing work achievements from other jobs!

@Lurleene

I remember picking DS up from holiday club en route to visiting his GPs for the weekend. I heard him say to the playleaders that it is good fun visiting his GPs as Granny has a big house with a swimming pool and an observatory. She has a bungalow with a paddling pool, and a telescope in her shed.

My daughter when her sort of cousin was complaining about being stuck in a hotel room with her family says "oh we only ever book villas, don't we mum?" Floor, swallow me whole!

I thought that when I wrote it at home, but mine was last so it sort of read like I was being snippy.

My kids are a bit unintentionally wanky whenever we take the train from Edinburgh to Glasgow (we have to cross Glasgow city centre, as there are two train stations a 5 min walk apart).

• 'Mum, why do so many people smoke here?'
• 'Mum, what's Paddy Power?'
• 'Mum, can we just go back to Edinburgh?'

Not me, but a social climbing friend living in London with a high paying bank job, took Polo lessons when she’d never had any interest in horses ever! Wanky to the highest degree!

Now this was me…..saying ‘congratulations’ to the pot bellied lady who was interviewing me for a maternity cover contract , when she wasn’t the pregnant one!

Hi all. Sorry, can’t stop to chat, off to speak to my sofa designer.

Kiss kiss.