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Original poster

What is supposed to be romantic, but just bloody isn’t?

880 replies

SmidgenofaPigeon · 29/04/2021 10:59

A Semisonic song just came on the radio and brought me back to when I was 18, and the slightly-hippy lovely guy I was seeing at the time used to play this on his guitar and sing to me. The whole song, then another song after it. Sometimes another one after that. I’d sort of sit on the bed or hover in front of him while he played his little concert just for me and smile along, but I found it excruciating. If he didn’t want to kiss me he wanted to be singing to me. It was so boring and I never knew how I was supposed to be reacting.

I couldn’t hack it so we didn’t last, and my friend was horrified and said what a lovely romantic thing that was that he did and how awful I was for ending it 😂

Has anyone got any ‘romantic’ things to add that were just a bit boring/awkward?

OP posts:
PerspicaciousGreen · 30/04/2021 20:50

A lot of physical gestures just don't work if you're five foot tall and he's six foot tall. Try holding hands walking down the street - one of you gets a crick in your shoulder. Dancing together when you have to take two strides to his one? Nope. Bending down to give you a surprise kiss but you can't see he's coming until he's cleared your hairline and accidentally headbutt him.

elfies · 30/04/2021 20:54

Many years ago ,
A boyfriend trying to be romantic ,singing soulful Roy Orbison songs to me , and being so unimpressed i sat there counting his spots and waiting for him to finish .

LemonRoses · 30/04/2021 20:56

Punting. Funny, but not romantic. Same for Gondala rides.
The whole singing below your bedroom window thing.

almondfinger · 30/04/2021 21:01

I've enjoyed this thread and howled and snorted my way through it.

Thank God I am not alone. Although I do love Paris!

BeaLola · 30/04/2021 21:05

All of the above especially sharing baths and wanting to spoon in bed

Poetry - was at a wedding where groom for his vows read his poem to bride - all about her being g his swan and his forever - all 18 verses ....

Danlsb · 30/04/2021 21:15

Agh not sure if anyone else has this but my DH seems to think rubbing himself against me whilst I am cooking, washing up etc and talking dirty is somehow romantic ?! 🤬 massive turn off and f ing annoying

JonSnowIsALoser · 30/04/2021 21:21

Valentine's Day. All its unimaginative cliched "romantic" trimmings and the pressure to celebrate a relationship on a particular day because everybody is doing it. Ugh! Massive turn off.

Cooking together - one of the popular scenarios this year of how to spend Valentine's Day romantically together in lockdown. Cooking together is about as romantic as cleaning the bathroom or hoovering together. Just a bloody chore.

Romantic meals - eating, like cooking, just doesn't turn me on. Interesting intelligent conversation does and you can't do it properly with your mouth full.

And I second most things mentioned in this brilliant thread.

Twilight7777 · 30/04/2021 21:32

Morning sex. Just no! I don’t even like to hear people speaking until I’ve properly woke up! Poems ewww (had an ex that wrote them it just turned me right off him). Valentine’s Day, maybe a card and a nice box of hotel chocolate chocs and a tasteful bunch of flowers, no roses and definitely not bloody red

osbertthesyrianhamster · 30/04/2021 21:35

@Twilight7777

Morning sex. Just no! I don’t even like to hear people speaking until I’ve properly woke up! Poems ewww (had an ex that wrote them it just turned me right off him). Valentine’s Day, maybe a card and a nice box of hotel chocolate chocs and a tasteful bunch of flowers, no roses and definitely not bloody red
Morning sex is just gross. I agree.
osbertthesyrianhamster · 30/04/2021 21:37

@BeaLola

All of the above especially sharing baths and wanting to spoon in bed

Poetry - was at a wedding where groom for his vows read his poem to bride - all about her being g his swan and his forever - all 18 verses ....

I went to one where the couple sang 'Endless Love' to each other. Badly. My dad pretending to have a sneezing fit to excuse himself from the church to run outside and laugh. I was jealous of him.
Spritesobright · 30/04/2021 21:44

I have never understood the appeal of diamond engagement rings.
Yes I'd love a blood diamond you paid 3 months' salary for so I can show everyone how much I'm worth to you. What?!!
Snags on things, will probably get lost and there are better things to spend your money on.

Thisbastardcomputer · 30/04/2021 21:44

When I was 19 one of my boyfriends was in the navy, I'd only actually been on a few dates and wasn't that keen.

Every single day I'd get home from work and there would be a letter full of really mushy romantic stuff, it was awful. My 12 year old sister and I used to absolutely piss our selves laughing. I did write back a couple of times but just stuff I'd been doing, mentioning I was out every night and with other lads etc but no hint taken.

I just knew I'd get a proposal of marriage when he did eventually come home, I legged it for the weekend I couldn't face it.

TheJade · 30/04/2021 21:45

Proposals 🤣🤣

I’ve been engaged twice, currently married and both proposals have been rather under whelming and embarrassingly boring. I must give off that kinda vibe 😢🤪
One a pissed conversation and one on a journey to see his family 😩

BigHairyLeggedSpider · 30/04/2021 21:48

Petals in the bath. Just fuck off

gottakeeponmovin · 30/04/2021 21:49

I love Paris ans don't Mind a bit of outdoor fun. Agree with the rest though - especially showers

Pinkdormobile · 30/04/2021 21:51

Oh god, I had several of the composer/performer types trying to serenade me into bed. Just the biggest cringe. I think it would have turned me off even if I'd fancied them in the first place.

My mates used to think it was hilarious!!!

JonSnowIsALoser · 30/04/2021 21:57

@MedusasBadHairDay
"I had one ex who thought gazing into each others eyes was really romantic, so we'd be down the pub with friends and I'd be mid conversation with someone when his face would gradually loom into view as he tried to force eye contact."

Hahaha! Trying to picture it on slow motion 😆😆😆😆

Bearnecessity · 30/04/2021 22:00

Oh I love morning sex....in fact it is the only time I initiate it I think...☺️

MrsLighthouse · 30/04/2021 22:05

69 position ....just no . FAR too much going on 🙄

expatinspain · 30/04/2021 22:08

Shower sex
Sharing a bath
Having sex on the beach
Sex in the rain
Dancing in the rain
Proposing with a massive audience of strangers
Love/hate relationships
...I could go on, but basically 99% of what you see in films!

CounsellorTroi · 30/04/2021 22:33

@Bearnecessity

Oh I love morning sex....in fact it is the only time I initiate it I think...☺️
Me too. Feel much more like it in the morning and during the day. At night all I want to do is read a bit and go to sleep.
Bearnecessity · 30/04/2021 22:38

Yes Counsellor....with you there....I am getting old...👵🏻

osbertthesyrianhamster · 30/04/2021 22:39

@MrsLighthouse

69 position ....just no . FAR too much going on 🙄
And it's shit. You can't give a good BJ in that position. Had one boyfriend who wanted it every time. Had to dump.
rabbitheadlights · 30/04/2021 22:40

I have terribly painful feet, there are a particular pair of slippers that are soooo comfy but they are expensive, but after a few months they need replacing. I often buy cheap ones and just make do. But every couple of months DP will order said slippers and Chuck them at me when I go for a shower, knowing I get that stupid mum guilt thing going on and won't buy them myself. That's romance!

ALongHardWinter · 30/04/2021 22:50

A 'nice' massage. One of my exes was obsessed with trying to give me a massage. Apart from the fact that I fail to see anything remotely romantic about it, I have arthritis and certainly didn't want someone who hadn't a clue what they were doing pummeling my painful joints,thanks very much.