Things I've done wrong according to teen DD

[GreenHairThingy]

Have enjoyed the various "toddler meltdown" threads over the years - you know the ones where the sandwich was cut the wrong way or the sky was the wrong shade of blue

Well this morning my only interaction with my 17 year old DD had her complaining that:

(super whingey tone) "this isn't fair! My arms just aren't strong enough for this!!! You know I've no upper arm strength" as i callously showed her how to empty and clean the tumble dryer filter so she could dry HER clothes. Take away is: I'm to blame for her lack of upper arm strength: Noted.

5 minutes later she is making herself a sandwich. I've bought a Warburtons loaf this morning.

(totally exasperated tone) "Mum, can you PLEASE stop buying bread that's about to go out of date!"

Confused, I check the date of the bread. It says the 15th March. She continues "exactly! The last loaf ran out on the 13th!!" (the loaf we finished yesterday, on the 11th)

When I politely and calmly suggested she call the team at Warburtons to complain, as i can only purchase the bread that is available with the dates that are offered, she rolled her eyes and said" it's really not ok"

I long for toddler tantrums. They were so much more reasonable.

It's been a good few years since I had to endure the teenage years, but the best two I remember are: The trouble with this house is there are TOO MANY DOORS" and "why is the food in this house always TOO HOT", it was shepherds pie and winter, what did she expect?

Ah, happy days 😂

@dancemom

Me 2 minutes ago - I'll start dinner at 1730

Teen dd - make it 1800

Me - okay

Teen dd - can you bring me a snack?

🤯

Gosh! Are you their housekeeper/cook? Can't they at least manage the snack themselves - and offer to make one for you?🌹

My 17yo stepson calls me out for leaving a wrapper on the floor next to a mug (i.e. if I've had a snack of a Kit Kat and a brew or something, very recently, and I've not been in the kitchen yet). He will come down from his room to get something from the kitchen, and will pick up my wrapper and mug and say I'm so messy, and I'd have a go at him 'if he did that'.

So, I NEVER leave wrappers on the floor. It's ONLY there, if I've only just finished with it, and I haven't stood up since. The second I stand up, it'll be taken to the bin.

He, however, leaves empty wrappers and boxes in the cupboards/fridge/freezer, his room looks like a bomb has hit it, he never knows where anything is, and he will pile things on top of the bin rather than actually empty it.

So yes, it really pisses me off when he complains about my wrapper, and acts like he's doing a massive public service by binning it 'for me'.

FWIW, it's not said jokingly either. He says it in a really sneery way, as if he's caught me out partaking in the bad behaviour I moan at him for. I'd never make him bin things as soon as he's swallowed the last mouthful - but I will mention if if he's walking back upstairs and leaves something, as then it won't get moved.

Faced with this sort of teen-twattery I have perfected an attitude of benign, smiling indifference. It works a treat.

I find that looking at them oh so vaguely, clearly miles away, saying 'hmmmmmm?' works a treat.

Way to get a teen to stomping and slamming 0-60. . .

(I only do this in the face of very severe provocation of course).

@LindaEllen

My 17yo stepson calls me out for leaving a wrapper on the floor next to a mug (i.e. if I've had a snack of a Kit Kat and a brew or something, very recently, and I've not been in the kitchen yet). He will come down from his room to get something from the kitchen, and will pick up my wrapper and mug and say I'm so messy, and I'd have a go at him 'if he did that'.

So, I NEVER leave wrappers on the floor. It's ONLY there, if I've only just finished with it, and I haven't stood up since. The second I stand up, it'll be taken to the bin.

He, however, leaves empty wrappers and boxes in the cupboards/fridge/freezer, his room looks like a bomb has hit it, he never knows where anything is, and he will pile things on top of the bin rather than actually empty it.

So yes, it really pisses me off when he complains about my wrapper, and acts like he's doing a massive public service by binning it 'for me'.

FWIW, it's not said jokingly either. He says it in a really sneery way, as if he's caught me out partaking in the bad behaviour I moan at him for. I'd never make him bin things as soon as he's swallowed the last mouthful - but I will mention if if he's walking back upstairs and leaves something, as then it won't get moved.

Its probably like "oh youre always telling me to clean out my hoarder's bedroom but LOOK AT YOU LEAVING THE WRAPPER, HYPOCRITE!"

I'm reading this thread in mute horror/trepidation at what I am yet to face, although DS (10) is already starting to show some Kevin-esque qualities. At least when he was a toddler and threw a tantrum I was able to hoist him up over my shoulder and remove him from the situation. I cannot do that now as he is solid and almost as tall as me - he still has a few years of growing to do

He often tells me I am unreasonable for asking him to do complex tasks - like closing the living room door when he has come through it, or picking his clothes up off the floor NEXT to the clothes basket and putting them IN the clothes basket.
In his defence though, he is quite good at emptying and reloading the washer/dryer/dishwasher under supervision and knows which buttons to press and he often asks if he can help with dinner. I'm determined that his future partner won't have to mother him and I only hope this desire to help out lasts

My favourite one ever was a couple of years ago before my daughter had even hit her teens.

Me: Can you shut the living room door to keep the heat in please?

Her: Wot? You're always screaming at me to keep the doors open!

Me: No. In the summer, we keep the doors open to allow the air to circulate. In the winter we keep them closed to conserve the heat. You know that. It's the same every year.

Her: So you don't want air to circulate then? You don't want fresh air in the house? Don't you want me to breathe? You want me to die! I wish I'd never been born!

Me: Great. Shut the door on your way out...

Her: AAAARRRRGGGHHHH! AND I DIDN'T MEAN TO SLAM THE DOOR. GOOOOOD!!!

🤣

Teen alert.
I think she wants something.
A. She got into bed and cuddled me this morning.
B. She made me a coffee.
C. She just washed up.

I am waiting to hear just what it is she wants, as she keeps giving me the look....

Whythesadface DD has just swept the kitchen floor. Doesn't seem to want anything but time will tell.

i love this thread!!!!!!!!!!!!!
this morning, from 18 year old dd "you know i have a phobia of fluff"

i am lol at the upper arm strength. dd here says that she's got bad circulation ... i point out the available exercise equipment in the house but that's not good enough for her as she's too busy watching sidemen (who??) on youtube.

plus the posh ham and nice granary bread isn't good enough for their lunches and they'd sooner live off meal deals

oooh and i'm going to try the looking miles away (like steve coogan's impression of richard gere in the trip) and saying "mmmmmmmmmmmmm". that's is a beaut!!!!!!!

It’s more that I cook one big family meal. It’s totally up to ds if he eats it or not. I’m not going to deliberately not cook enough for him.

@MissyB1 that sounds more than reasonable. If someone I were serving food to repeatedly moaned about it, though, they’d be cooking for themself until they learned some manners.

@AnneOfCleavage
She also doesn't get it when I smile, chat or compliment another person. I get "Do you know that person?" If I say "No" I get "Why are you talking to them like you know them?" I smile at other dog walkers or admire their cute dog and apparently that's sinister

Yes to this! My son was also mortified if I smiled or spoke unprovoked to a total stranger.

He’s better now we have a dog as many people comment on how pretty she is and what unusual colouring she has but on the wrong day, I’m still a major embarrassment with having the audacity to pass the time of day with strangers! 🙄😅

Oh my goodness yes:

"I hate going out with you Mum!"
"Er.... (bravely) why?"
"Because you talk to people!"

Loved the PP's summing up of our collective dilemma

I should be schrodinger's mother- simultaneously responsible for everything he needs/wants and also not involved at all.

Even though my teen is hideous sometimes age 14 (nearly 15)
She still has a bed full of Jellycats and 4 disgusting rabbits she’s had since a baby. She still sucks her thumb and strokes their ears.

So when I’m about to hit the roof, l see her doing this, and all the anger just dissolves😧

I know I’m crap!

I didn't buy batteries this week. He will never be able to play Xbox again, apparently. All.my.fault.

DS2 sometimes begins questions - - usually complaints-- with "Mother..?" and gets irritated when I answer "Yes, son...?“ It's the little things 😂

Oh god the clothes shopping brought back memories

My mum always said she hated shopping with me...but it was something she suggested everytime!

I hated clothes shopping with her too as we had vastly different tastes unlike my sister who was the carbon copy of my mum.

So we always argued at shops because she would point at something, I hated it, she would argue it was nice, I still hated it and she would storm off talking about how I had no fashion sense.

@ItsIgginningtolooklikelockdown

I didn't buy batteries this week. He will never be able to play Xbox again, apparently. All.my.fault.

Did he also mention that his life is ruined, he will have no friends and will surely be horrendously bullied at school?

@Soubriquet

Oh god the clothes shopping brought back memories

My mum always said she hated shopping with me...but it was something she suggested everytime!

I hated clothes shopping with her too as we had vastly different tastes unlike my sister who was the carbon copy of my mum.

So we always argued at shops because she would point at something, I hated it, she would argue it was nice, I still hated it and she would storm off talking about how I had no fashion sense.

It really annoys me when mums of boys long for a daughter citing one of the reasons being you can go shopping with them. That’s one of the worst parts! Bloody hate it, the hours I’ve spent hanging round filthy dirty New Look changing rooms while dd sulks over the clothes. Thank goodness dd3 prefers online shopping now and the older two buy their own clothes.

My 18yo was exasperated with me yesterday as I couldn't tell him whether the salad leaves he was using were edible. My answer of 'if they're not slimy and they look edible go ahead' wasn't fair because he 'doesn't know about food'.

@babbaloushka well that goes without saying!

I used to be a fashion stylist in my dim dark past.

Dd hates clothes as a matter of principle. And hates anything l select ‘ because just because you messed with clothes 100’s of years ago doesn’t mean you know anything about them now’

Yeah, much preferred clothes shopping with DS. He loved clothes. We’d spend hours in Top Man.