Things I've done wrong according to teen DD

[GreenHairThingy]

Have enjoyed the various "toddler meltdown" threads over the years - you know the ones where the sandwich was cut the wrong way or the sky was the wrong shade of blue

Well this morning my only interaction with my 17 year old DD had her complaining that:

(super whingey tone) "this isn't fair! My arms just aren't strong enough for this!!! You know I've no upper arm strength" as i callously showed her how to empty and clean the tumble dryer filter so she could dry HER clothes. Take away is: I'm to blame for her lack of upper arm strength: Noted.

5 minutes later she is making herself a sandwich. I've bought a Warburtons loaf this morning.

(totally exasperated tone) "Mum, can you PLEASE stop buying bread that's about to go out of date!"

Confused, I check the date of the bread. It says the 15th March. She continues "exactly! The last loaf ran out on the 13th!!" (the loaf we finished yesterday, on the 11th)

When I politely and calmly suggested she call the team at Warburtons to complain, as i can only purchase the bread that is available with the dates that are offered, she rolled her eyes and said" it's really not ok"

I long for toddler tantrums. They were so much more reasonable.

@StepAwayFromTheEcclesCakes

Mine went to uni.... then came back, he is lovely to be fair BUT knows. Every. Fucking. Thing 🤨 and does enjoy sharing this wisdom, he is also a spoony fucker grrr

Same here!

Mine went in September so has only managed a term, but has returned as the Chief Expert of Every-fucking-thing

3 fucking months she’s been at home now. God love her, but please let them go back soon 🙏🏻

Mine’s specialist subject is dinner. What’s for dinner/not shepherds pie agaaaaiiiinnnn/when’s dinner/I should use that baking tray/I buy the wrong pesto/why didn’t I give her sushi when she was younger (because she carried on like she was being poisoned the first time she was offered it and I hate the stuff)/I always serve it far too late (I finish work at 5:30pm and dinner is around 6:30pm) and everyone else she knows eats much earlier. She’s now in charge of cooking 😂

Although she uses every pot, pan and utensil in the bloody kitchen and makes an unholy mess.

I also do the laundry all wrong, she never gets her socks back (I have a sock basket - they’re supposed to get their own out of it as I am not pairing up bastard socks) and there’s never any food in the house (she means she’s eaten all the goodies again).

DS isn’t even a teenager yet but I became an embarrassing mum when I went to pick DS and his friends up from the skatepark and when they went to put their skateboards in the boot, there was shopping in the boot. And worse still, I’d been to Aldi. Never mind the fact that the skatepark is an hour round trip and we live in the middle of nowhere so it was sensible to combine a trip to the supermarket with picking them up 🙄.

Everything. Just everything. College is rubbish. Covid tests are rubbish. Getting out of bed is rubbish. Bringing plates etc downstairs and actually doing something with them is rubbish. I thought we had got away without the teenage stroppiness I really did.
I was there .... all smug .... as my son was a delight. And then BAM.... hit 17 and is horrible. Apparently I know nothing about everything and he knows everything.
I don’t drink. But man he could send me down that path.
And breathe............. and as someone said on another thread. They make them this way so u don’t get upset when they leave home

They make them this way so u don’t get upset when they leave home grin

Oh yes!!!

Oh dear god the teen tantrum a last till 17??

I remember being 14 and hormonal and losing my shit because my Nanna had washed my jeans I was wanting to wear and they were wet.

I was promptly taught how to use the washing machine and tumble dryer and from then on I was made to do my own washing.

And she told my Grandad when he got home from work who then proceeded to wind me up more by calling me "Kevin" from Kevin & Perry and kept saying "jam sandwich Mrs Patterson" every time I spoke 😂

I quickly learned.

This post is making me feel a lot better. I also have one of these.

My one pushed past my tolerance threshold earlier in the week, when after a full five days of unadulterated teenage toxicity (seriously, she binge-teened), she laughed at her sister when she was in distress.

She saw me giving her 'the look', and smirked, rolled her eyes, and went into her lair room.

I went in and asked if now was a good time for a chat. 'No Mother (I don't know about anybody else, but being called mother makes my hand itch), I'm on a call'. Who to? Tutoring.

Right, come and let me know when you're off.

Obviously she put that time to good use, honing her clearly somewhat rusty survival skills, because she came out, most polite and conciliatory, and it's lasted a whole 48 hours!

... and as someone said on another thread. They make them this way so u don’t get upset when they leave home.

That is genius!

@Paranoidandroidmarvin1350

Everything. Just everything. College is rubbish. Covid tests are rubbish. Getting out of bed is rubbish. Bringing plates etc downstairs and actually doing something with them is rubbish. I thought we had got away without the teenage stroppiness I really did. I was there .... all smug .... as my son was a delight. And then BAM.... hit 17 and is horrible. Apparently I know nothing about everything and he knows everything. I don’t drink. But man he could send me down that path. And breathe............. and as someone said on another thread. They make them this way so u don’t get upset when they leave home

17?! I had banked on the worst being around 15 or 16 and that 17 was well on the road to normality again. I fear for my (future) sanity.

@Ladywinesalot

Oh dear god the teen tantrum a last till 17??

No. Promise.

OK, I'm lying.

I had no idea though so hopefully forewarned is forearmed. Best of British (or wherever you are) to you!

Ah,the teen years where you breathe wrong,look wrong and can't do anything right!
I've got 3 at the moment (13,15,nearly 17) and today's been delights of complaints about food,school,lack snackscan't find clean X,y,z

"jam sandwich Mrs Patterson" every time I spoke

😂

I also have 2 stepchildren, both in their teens. The 18 year old is just coming out of the moany stage (although she does still have her moments) but our 15 year old boy is an absolute delight. He's a bugger for being late for school but that is his only flaw. I really didn't know it was possible, or maybe it's because my own DD has been an utter terror from age 12-17 that anything he does out of line is so minor it barely registers.

There's hope for our youngest who's 8. He will stay lovely and cuddly and never turn into Kevin and Perry. I'm absolutely sure of it.

(seriously, she binge-teened) this made me laugh, not just because it's funny but also because it's the most perfect description ever.

And YES to being called "Mother" because there's such a attitude thrown in with it. Also it reminds me of Norman Bates (the new one from Bates Motel) and it creeps me out.

I was the same. I genuinely believed that 17 was some magic age when they suddenly became reasonable and pleasant.

She turned 17 In December. It's March ffs! My grey hairs are sprouting at an alarming rate.

Deleted the quote, that was a reply to @SnoozyBoozy

[quote Stilllivinginazoo]Ah,the teen years where you breathe wrong,look wrong and can't do anything right!
I've got 3 at the moment (13,15,nearly 17) and today's been delights of complaints about food,school,lack snackscan't find clean X,y,z

Dd 15: I didn’t call her loudly enough yesterday and she slept through her first 3 online classes. Despite the fact she had been out of the bed and we had a full conversation before I left her to log on (from bed natch) and I started work.
DS 13: at 10.45pm Sunday, my majorly important project is due by midnight and you didn’t make me do it

Home schooling has broken me.

@Mayzee another one found lacking in being a super-human mother. The audacity!

I feel for these poor mites, I really do...

It's the lack of food that makes my teens moan. There is just never anything to eat in this house!
(I'm a borderline prepper, there is always food, bloody loads of it. But not always crisps or biscuits.)

Mine is no longer a teen but my goodness the drama is still there. I actually hide now whenever he's cooking, partly so I don't have to listen to the bad language. The other day I heard "FFS why haven't we got any basmati rice?"as he perused the 4 other types of rice in the cupboard. " I SUPPOSE I'll have to use long grain instead" - what a 1st world problem to have! I just sniggered from 2 rooms away!

I am also a terrible parent because my daughter couldn't find her school shoes, having looked "everywhere". I had put them away in her shoe drawer. Obviously this is somewhere she would never put them so she was baffled by this. She then had to run to catch her train. This was obviously my fault.

Oh God, the sheer exasperation and expression of being completely hard done by they can pour into the word “Mother” would be impressive if it wasn’t so fucking annoying

My 13 year old has recently decided to start calling me 'Mother'! I didn't know it was a common teen thing.

Love the 'binge teen' description- so apt. My DS this week has decided that just about everything is 'bullshit'. Most days start with him either complaining that I have woken him up too early or alternatively that I have not woken him up early enough. Then lots of huffing about breakfast choices (I'm sure you'll all agree with him that not cooking a full English before school every morning is 'bullshit' and almost certainly some sort of abuse). Or maybe huffing about being told he needs to eat breakfast. I am also definitely to blame for us leaving later than he would have liked and risking being late for school. Quite understandably he points out all the things I should do to make sure this doesn't happen (putting out his clothes, making sure this includes the specific socks etc he wants today, knowing which books/homework he needs and putting them in his bag etc). But quite reasonably at the same time I must not 'interfere' when he is getting ready, go in his school bag, 'nag' him about the time etc. I should be schrodinger's mother- simultaneously responsible for everything he needs/wants and also not involved at all.

Mine screamed that she expected me to support her, not offer conditions on my LOVE. I was offering support, just not the support she wanted.