Things I've done wrong according to teen DD

[GreenHairThingy]

Have enjoyed the various "toddler meltdown" threads over the years - you know the ones where the sandwich was cut the wrong way or the sky was the wrong shade of blue

Well this morning my only interaction with my 17 year old DD had her complaining that:

(super whingey tone) "this isn't fair! My arms just aren't strong enough for this!!! You know I've no upper arm strength" as i callously showed her how to empty and clean the tumble dryer filter so she could dry HER clothes. Take away is: I'm to blame for her lack of upper arm strength: Noted.

5 minutes later she is making herself a sandwich. I've bought a Warburtons loaf this morning.

(totally exasperated tone) "Mum, can you PLEASE stop buying bread that's about to go out of date!"

Confused, I check the date of the bread. It says the 15th March. She continues "exactly! The last loaf ran out on the 13th!!" (the loaf we finished yesterday, on the 11th)

When I politely and calmly suggested she call the team at Warburtons to complain, as i can only purchase the bread that is available with the dates that are offered, she rolled her eyes and said" it's really not ok"

I long for toddler tantrums. They were so much more reasonable.

I text all wrong. Apparently, the fact that DS is massive and has giant hands is nothing at all to do with his ability to text one handed.

And when I said, " I can't even with my giant lady hands" ( I too am tall and big of extremity) I was accused of being transphobic.

Apparently, talking about my own hands, in a room with no one other than my son is transphobic.

My 15 year old had turned into a no it all especially with tech (er he may have a small point) . We were looking at a Ring doorbell and he announced "oh I'll help with that"

He is still muttering about our purchase of a quite high spec laptop a few weeks ago. He's a bit astounded that he wasn't involved in the buying process and we didn't now down to his superior wisdom

I've now got a laptop that " you don't need i7 , x gb is way to much for what I would ever use etc

I just tell him " but it was pretty" and he storms off

Oh god yes the "what's for dinner" even when I have all the ingredients right there

We do meal plan for when we are at work and it usually gets written on the white board

So yes I'm going to punch the idea of sending him the meal plan

I've been banned from nodding and smiling at the television if I agree with something.

I’m banned from eating🤷🏼‍♀️I make too much noise....

And when I said, " I can't even with my giant lady hands" ( I too am tall and big of extremity) I was accused of being transphobic.

Apparently, talking about my own hands, in a room with no one other than my son is transphobic

.....wut?!!

We went shopping.

I lined up at a busy counter, did the thing with my card, took bag, said 'Thanks!' Felt relieved I hadn't dropped or fumbled anything and held up the queue.

Daughter had major rant 'You're so rude, can't you be nice to the poor sales staff? You barely spoke, like you think you're so superior to someone who works in retail. It's so patronising!'

Next shop I made chatty small-talk with the assistant.
'OMG, you are so embarrassing! That woman was not your friend, do you have to talk down to people just because they're working in a shop? It's so patronising!'

Apparently, talking about my own hands, in a room with no one other than my son is transphobic.
Shocking behaviour, reeducation for you, cis!

I love this Change

visions of the T. rex with their short arms all withered but fully capable of being terrifying and causing havoc

Teen T-Rex. If only their mothers had cared more and done things differently!

Ha ha Teen Rex!

I’m now giving my 15... month old daughter the side eye.

She still doesn’t talk and I’ve desperate for her to start.. perhaps the delay is for the best!

I am a mother of a preschooler, love the crazy stuff she comes out with.

After reading this OP I fear I may have been a version of your daughter (I was a teenager in the late 90s!).

I remember moaning to my Mum that the car wasn’t warm immediately after we started on our journey and thought she was horrible for telling me we had to wait for the engine to warm up first 😂

@PomBearWithoutHerOFRS you sound like such a lovely mum. I bet your now DIL was very glad to have you in her corner.

From my just turned 16 yr old DD, 'don't tell me what to do!'

Whatever, I'm paying for the roof over your head, food etc.

I make my 3 do all their own laundry after getting tired of the complaints about what was washed when and constant complaints about missing socks. They're 11, 13 and 15 and seem to manage it with minimal reminding to get it done.

My dd fell asleep last night fully clothed, on her bed about 9:30.

I went in to check her. She looked so beautiful, black curls, red lips, arms flung out like a baby.

Then she woke up, and the laser glare shot out from under her eyelids. I ran away.

Dh and l had a long conversation about how lovely she is when she’s asleep.😁

My 15 year old DS is very mature and no trouble at all so I was busy congratulating myself on my parenting when DD turned 13 and spoiled my illusion.

My name is now Mother or 'Mother dearest' when she wants something.

I failed to remind her to about the laptop power lead so it was my fault when it died in the middle of her Zoom Scout meeting. I brought her the lead and accidentally stepped on her new eyeshadow on the floor. I should have known that's where she kept it.

The complete lack of visible carpet in her room is because she's just messy and can't help it.

I shouldn't mention the state of her room or collect dirty crockery because she will deal with it in her own time.

I've got three , 18dd 16dd and 14ds. But my 16dd is a total Princess. She even has, " Do Not Distrub. Princess catching up on her beauty sleep " on her bedroom door.

Her father takes her warm croissants ( no more than 4 mins in the oven mind ) and Starbucks House Blend Medium before he goes to work. She says she can't possibly start the day otherwise.

To be fair, we very nearly lost her when she was a baby and I think that's stayed with him because there is simingly nothing he wont do for her.

It's become a running joke with the rest of the family but she just brushes it off with, " my beauty is my gift to mankind".

Doesn't stop her brother putting plastic spiders in her bed prompting a total melt down.

I'm just glad to be out the door by 6 am.

seemingly

My dd broke into tears and stomped off yesterday because I was ignoring her. First thing I knew about it was the door slamming.

I'm deaf. She was behind me and I didn't hear her speak. She's also deaf. She knows deaf people usually can't hear something said behind them.

I was totally out of line with my disability right there. Soz.

This a funny thread, but blimey - why on earth are you cooking for teens who whinge and moan about what you’re serving?

My nearly 13 year old gets annoyed every morning because I won't make him supermodels for breakfast, or drag me and the 5 week old baby to the bakers to buy him a roll and sausage.
Also, its my fault he doesn't do his school work because I don't wake him up in the morning, or help him do the work except I wale him up at least 4 times before I take his younger brother to school, then carry on trying when I get home, and tell him constantly that if he needs help with the work to let me know. All my fault though 🙄.
The 7 year old isn't much better.

This thread has made me feel better and less of a failure as a parent.

DS1 (21) told me this week that "all I ever do is find fault with him and criticise anything he ever does". This is after months of tip toeing around him while he 'finds himself and works out what is purpose is in life' now he's decided to drop out of uni. 'Finding himself' seems to involve mainly playing the XBox. All I did was comment that spending £90 on a 'build you own guitar kit' might not be the best idea when you have no income and a humongous overdraft. But I have apparently damaged his self esteem beyond repair.

DS2 (19) is another one that Knows. Fucking. Everything. Especially anything to do with health and fitness. He spends his time telling me how how I could do so much better with my diet, fitness regime and hydration. This from the boy who pretty much existed on a diet of chicken nuggets and strawberry milkshake until he was 10.

I love them both to bits, but my god I'll be glad when we're not all together in the house all day!

Oh, I'm a demon because we ran out of his favourite chicken stock. The three other types we did have were just not up to standard. What times university??

I'm loving all these stories so much

My misdemeanour was suggesting to DD (15 at the time) that if she was embarrassed standing waiting for me to pick her up in town that she stand by the handy bus stop so it would look to the world that she had a reason to be standing there and not some Billy no mates she was embarrassed being. You'd have though I'd suggested she stand there naked she was horrified at this suggestion. She still brings this up neatly two years later and is still scarred by this.

She also doesn't get it when I smile, chat or compliment another person. I get "Do you know that person?" If I say "No" I get "Why are you talking to them like you know them?" I smile at other dog walkers or admire their cute dog and apparently that's sinister.

She also doesn't like me chatting to her friends. Never mind the fact she told me her friends think her parents are cool and so, so lovely.

She does however say "I do love you mummy you do know that don't you?" When I eye roll at something she says that I'm embarrassing for and I get a hug so it's mainly okay.

@NoAuthorityAtAll

This a funny thread, but blimey - why on earth are you cooking for teens who whinge and moan about what you’re serving?

It’s more that I cook one big family meal. It’s totally up to ds if he eats it or not. I’m not going to deliberately not cook enough for him.

@ArseInTheCoOpWindow

Could l just share the hell of clothes shopping with my dd. ( pre lockdown)

So I’m not allowed to suggest anything or pull it off a rack to show her. I just have to look alert and interested at all times. If l don’t, I get accused of ‘just standing there’. So l have to maintain this rictus smile whilst wanting to scream all the time. And look involved but not being allowed to do anything.

I don’t go with her anymore.

Oh God yes! Shopping with my 14 year old dd was pure hell. She’s ASD which doesn’t help. I had to maintain the correct distance from her at all times, if I was too far away I was ignoring her/not showing interest. Too close and I was crowding her.

Luckily though she’s decided she hates all shopping in actual shops and prefers to do it online.