Things I've done wrong according to teen DD

[GreenHairThingy]

Have enjoyed the various "toddler meltdown" threads over the years - you know the ones where the sandwich was cut the wrong way or the sky was the wrong shade of blue

Well this morning my only interaction with my 17 year old DD had her complaining that:

(super whingey tone) "this isn't fair! My arms just aren't strong enough for this!!! You know I've no upper arm strength" as i callously showed her how to empty and clean the tumble dryer filter so she could dry HER clothes. Take away is: I'm to blame for her lack of upper arm strength: Noted.

5 minutes later she is making herself a sandwich. I've bought a Warburtons loaf this morning.

(totally exasperated tone) "Mum, can you PLEASE stop buying bread that's about to go out of date!"

Confused, I check the date of the bread. It says the 15th March. She continues "exactly! The last loaf ran out on the 13th!!" (the loaf we finished yesterday, on the 11th)

When I politely and calmly suggested she call the team at Warburtons to complain, as i can only purchase the bread that is available with the dates that are offered, she rolled her eyes and said" it's really not ok"

I long for toddler tantrums. They were so much more reasonable.

Is she a secret T-Rex?

I'm sitting with hair dye on my head. 5 minutes left. But I am being unreasonable not to let DD take her shower until I've rinsed. Apparently I should just leave it on an extra 10 mins (rather than her having to wait)

I want to give you hope! Mine were like this (x3) and are now early to late twenties. Today my daughter (who had some very very difficult moments) sent flowers, rang to have a nice chat, sent pictures of her tidy room etc. There is an end to it! hang in there! xx

My mum said to 18 year old sister “please can you make your sister (me) a cup of tea” I had called to the house with my brand new baby and 3 and 5 year olds, bleeding heavily, exhausted, boobs solid from build up of milk, no sleep and baby blues.

Her reply was “oh my god mum I’m absolutely exhausted I’ve just driven all the way to Tesco!” Which is about a 4 minute drive away.

She is now in uni and how she has survived so far I have no idea 🤦🏼‍♀️😅😅😅

What a brilliant thread - made me chuckle. Brightened up an otherwise mundane lockdown Sunday evening and made me realise that 13 year old DD is quite normal. I shall continue to ignore the dirty clothes littering her bedroom floor (which doesn’t come naturally) and hope that when the clean ones run out and all hell breaks loose, she’ll remember what I told her about loading the washing machine.

Boys are just as bad. My youngest (22) asked if I could get some snacks in when I did big shop. I bought hummus, pitta, olives, nice meats, Pate. When he saw it all in the fridge he rolled his eyes, sighed theatrically and accused me of buying OLD PEOPLES SNACKS. Who knew. I have since conducted a large amount of research amongst my staff (I work with a lot of teens and twenty somethings) and they all agree. I should have bought things that you can just take out and eat with no plate or knife etc. So crap basically. Before I get castigated I did tell him to buy his own crap. And buy me a chocolate orange while he was at it!!!

Oh this makes me feel less of an awful mum because I'm like the WORST and even worse than that I'm UNCOOL or so my partners daughter says. I don't ever try to be cool...im too busy rushing about for that.
I'm actually laughing at the thought of OP's daughter and her little tiny arms. How do they think we all have to do it when we are tired etc. Makes me giggle

Thank you so much for this thread. I have two teenagers and have been recently feeling as if I must have done everything wrong in the course of bringing them up. Now I will go around having more faith in my abilities. We are routinely told that when we disagree with the eldest we are "invalidating" her feelings. Discussions around current affairs end in arguments because we dare to have different points of view to theirs. Occasionally, even my facial expression is misconstrued when I am probably just thinking about what to cook ! Thank you so much for all these examples which feel familiar.

@Mitzimccormack OLD PEOPLE SNACKS

I've a mind to call 101 frankly.

@IHaveBrilloHair

Because they are your child and you love them fiercely, you adore them, and in between the horrid, they are fun and kind, generous, intelligent, sarcastic and very much a wee part of you, and as hard as it is, you love being their Mum.

Yes! This.

Sometimes it can be hard but ultimately it's all about teaching them to be independent and fit to be unleashed on the wider world. So they get to be unreasonable little buggers in the safety of their own home and we get to take the piss out of them on an anonymous forum and feel a little less bad that everyone else seems to be experiencing similar, and that one day they come out the other side as perfectly normal and pleasant people.

I would love those snacks, ergo I am definitely old. At least I’m old and well nourished 🤨.

old people snacks! Omg!
I was telling my 17 yo DD today not to rule out the civil service (i work for the cs) and she said 'omg mom, seriously, no, i'm alpha, you're beta, please don't say that to me again''. Luckily I'm used to be ing insulted but that one was creative.

@2tired2talk oh yes, mine silenced me today when I started a conversation about Harry and Meghan (it would have been complimentary) with a "can we just not, we will just end up arguing"

@Babysharkdododododododododod that's absolutely brilliant! Sums up the entire thread rather succinctly in that one example I think!

Luckily I had cake and prosecco to hand so was quite happy to "just not" on this occasion

@Amber2022 I've been really lucky with my stepchildren, they seem to like me. We are yet to live together though so I shall report back later this year once our blended family has had time to mesh (or not!)

“When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be 21, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years.”

Mark Twain, I believe something similar is by Churchill.

I forgot..... I've never been allowed on her Instagram account but today she added me as a friend and had put up a lovely Mother's Day post with some old photos on. She can be very lovely.

I've been told that I am not allowed to comment on any of her posts or I will be instantly removed from her friend list

‘Wahhh only 5 days...It’s not a holiday, it’s only a break 😩’

‘Well you stay home and I’ll save money taking you AND your friend to Ireland for 5 days’

‘It’s not a holiday unless we go on a plane and it’s sunny there’.

😡

@BigSandyBalls2015

Just thought of another ….. our house is always freezing apparently … this has nothing to do with the fact that she's swanning about in shorts and a crop top.

I used to get that at school, I liked to have air in my classroom but because they refused to bring a coat to school, hated the school sweatshirt, never wore long sleeves in winter my room was supposed to be tropical! The worst part was that some of the dopey parents agreed with them, if their sprog wanted to pay no heed to the season or the temperature it was up to me to accommodate their precious needs.

I'm dying at old people snacks!
Dd's current snack of choice is easter eggs, I know this to be true as there were several empty boxes in her house today!
(Its v tidy, but they have to keep the recycling in the house incase it blows away)

@Inthesameboatatmo

For what its worth my 13 year old daughter told me yesterday that I will never understand what shes going through hormonally (sp) as her hormones are different to mine

I once got a similar comment from a daughter she wasn't happier when I told OH not to worry about her it was 'these new fangled hormoney things'.

@springtimesunshine

No no no I refuse to believe you all! I have two girls aged five and two. I thought they'd stop the tantrumming (tbf the five year old has) and then it'd be into calmer waters.

Please do not tell me that the tantrums return I can't cope

I'm fucked, aren't I?!

My 2 are 9 and 10 at the minute. I call it the eye of the storm. They are over the toddler tantrums and fairly compliant ( just) but I am gearing up for the teenage years.

Just found this thread - I honestly thought it was just my son that knows Every. Fucking. Thing. That calls me by my first name when I've 'upset' him. That complains about what I'm cooking for his dinner and then eats it all anyway. I actually feel so much better

I think we’re gradually coming out of the other side - years 13 - 15 were properly dreadful , police involvement , school moves , you name it. Now though , she’s 90 percent rational , and 10 percent alien teen species .

Today’s corker was down to a power cut - we live near a wetland reserve where the swans migrate to in winter from Russia . They’re crap at landing so tend to bounce off power lines a lot, so we’re used to blips . Today we must be insane living here , why can’t we live in an area without swans . All this because the internet got cut off for 30 seconds.

Ignore her. They grow out of it.

Today we went to meet up with DC1 for a family dog walk. But 16yr old DD couldn't walk very far today "because the ground was too uneven".

Love these stories especially today when I was seriously doubting my parenting skills as DD Is mostly foul!
I practically begged her for her washing basket from her room ( not allowed in ) so I could launder HER clothes, cue much drama "in 10 minutes" etc then when finally allowed to retrieve it , I was asked "when will it be ready cos I've no clean underwear left!" FFS