Early Noughties teen mag ridiculousness

[SmidgenofaPigeon]

Does anyone remember the little nuggets if totally ridiculous advice they’d give you in teen magazines?

I used to be an avid reader of Shout! magazine. The main goal of these magazines seemed to be being popular and having boys notice you obviously, and were filled with totally mad tips on how to achieve these things and not be a ‘geek’ who wasn’t interested. Which is totally inappropriate advice these days, happily.

I remember one was ‘if you are invited to a party, arrive late and leave early! You are a social butterfly who has had to squeeze the party in between other engagements’

Happily I HAD been invited to a party in my local pub function room that very weekend! I spent a long time applying glitter hair mascara to my fringe to make it clump together attractively (why) and I think I even had on one of those fetching skirt with trousers combos with a vest top from Tammy girl. I got my dad to drive round the block a bit so I could try to be late, but it didn’t take very long and I think I turned up at ten minutes after the start time. I had a few dances to All Saints and Steps and drank a couple of cans of Coke and an hour before it was due to finish, I did a big show of having to rush off.

Now, we lived in a very small town. There was NO WAY any other parties were happening on the same night. But desperately trying to stick to my social butterfly narrative I said goodbye and off I went.

I sat round the corner in the bus shelter until it was time to get picked up. While everyone else was having a nice time at the party

What a knob! When I got to school on the Monday everyone was saying it was rude to leave the party early and I felt like such an idiot.

Can anyone remember any more of the ridiculous things they used to spout in these magazines? I’d love to get my hands one now as I think it would be hilarious

The Ginger Spice style highlights, just stripes of red, brown and yellow all over. They were pretty thin stripes, how long did they take to get done? I never had them.

I tried to buy some Wella Colour Mousse this lockdown just to spice things up a bit (you have to make your own fun) but they don't make it anymore, and there doesn't seem to be anything similar? The only colours I could find were semi permanent, and I wanted one that washed out after 3 washes (even though the box said 8 washes).

I didn’t have the Ginger Spice highlights but I bet they look ages. I couldn't have the very wispy thin fringe made of about 12 strands of hair either, my stupid hair had a cowlick so I had to make do with a quiff instead.

They were so fucked up, looking back.
Heat/ closer etc were also absolutely vile. 'Circle of shame' If a celeb dared to have a bit of cellulite or a vaguely normal body. Absolutely vile.

Superdrug do an own brand wash in wash out shampoo I find them to be really good and make your hair look shiny as well. Cheap as chips and always on offer

Great thread, I’m still reading through it.

I was born in 1972 so probably older than most of the posters here but I loved magazines. I read Just Seventeen from about 13-15, I got it every week. I also dipped in and out of Jackie, Mizz and Smash Hits.

Preceded by those when I was about 8-10, it was very much loved Girl comic full of photo stories about ballet, school and horse riding. This was the hilight of my week! There was also a long running drawn story called Patty’s World

Oh and I STILL have and use my Just Seventeen comb! Will post a photo later.

Great memories!

@bendmeoverbackwards

Oh and I STILL have and use my Just Seventeen comb! Will post a photo later.

Bloody hell I still have mine and use it all the time!! The green wide tooth one? It’s amazing! Wow it’s gotta be nearly 30 years old!!

I had a horoscope book from j17 that was my bible. It told me what your body type was for your sign, your personality was and what your potential man's would be like. I can still remember the pictures. And being envious that the piscean or scorpian girl got to look curvy and sexy, whilst I was rangey and ponytailed.

I just googled cowlick and it just looks like normal hair to me. I was expecting Hey Arnold!

@blowdryrat it's when a bit of the front of your hair constantly sticks up and to the side like this picture. In the days before straighteners this was a big problem. Obviously at that time I wanted the 90s style of twelve, evenly spaced wisps of a fringe (that looked like the infamous J17 wide toothed comb actually).

Here’s my comb. Got a few teeth missing but I still use it

I used to absolutely live for the problem page in any mag, & used to wonder WTF was heavy petting ... Although I suspected it was something rude, & continued to read in the hope that I would learn about sex for when the time came 😆

@bendmeoverbackwards

Here’s my comb. Got a few teeth missing but I still use it

I’ve just taken a pic of mine too! We can never throw them away!

Another Just Seventeen comb, nearly 30 years old!

Look what I’ve got!

Classic problem.

@LunaNorth

Classic problem.

I love that these same questions would come up really frequently. In back to back issues. Almost like the people writing in didn't read the magazine. Or they were just made up by the mag - how many teenagers use "whom" correctly?!

Letters would have been edited and grammar corrected. Might not have been real, but it would have been informative for girls who really didn't know, and also set the tone that this was a place where you really could ask anything, however daft or embarrassing it seemed.

@Bbq1 I think the comic mag u mentioned was called 'M&J stories'. I haven't thought about that since I was 13!

[quote Chwaraeteg]@Bbq1 I think the comic mag u mentioned was called 'M&J stories'. I haven't thought about that since I was 13![/quote]
Oh yes, M&J stories Chwaraeteg, that was it! I don't think it was published for r that long, it was a great read though.

I loved for those magazines. I remember doing the quizzes on what to wear. You had to choose a different outfit for each occasion. Parties, dates and pizza with friends. I don’t know why I was so into it. I had the grand total of three outfits outside of my school uniform, all awful. And I didn’t really have any friends let alone dates or money to go and do anything.
Yet I lapped it up!

I remember Sugar and Mizz used to do a one off special from time to time - a bigger glossier version of the regular magazine. Would usually feature make up tips for different skin tones and then an article on some girls in a specific type of school - they had some girls from Italia Conti featured and then all I wanted to do was go there and dance all day

Did anyone ever go to the Mizz Roadshow in the late 1990’s? I remember seeing Will Mellor, Steps and 911

Ah nostalgia! I loved all magazines in my teens smash hits,sugar,shout,mizz,just17,more! With position of the fortnight. I took into school and handed it around and the boys looking at it got it confiscated! Does anyone remember real that was a late 90s magazine but I loved it. Later on Cosmo, Marie Claire Elle vogue I think I was their target market and i spent a fortune! Now I resist the lure of magazines but I loved them. Didn't really get the sublimal messages I am a prolific reader though!

So much nostalgia, I love this thread! I was never much of a girly girl but did read all these mags before getting into heavy metal at about 14 and moving on to Kerrang. Remember feeling very naughty reading Just 17 at around 13. I had many sun in/shaders and toners related hair disasters!