Stuff you think must happen to other people - but can't risk asking?

[IMissFrance]

Anyone else have stuff happen to you that must happen to others.

But you can't really ask because what if they say "NO! How weird!" And then you can never talk to that person again.

So I'm bringing it to the anonymity of Mumsnet.

I'd love to hear other peoples. And will start off.

• whenever I wash my hair in the shower (I have long hair) loose hairs wash down my back and end up in my bum crack. End of my shower I have to check there's no hair left.

I can't be alone in this grossness! (Or can I)

I get the weird fanny aches when I have my period too. Was trying to explain to my OH last night - not horrendously painful as such but like all the nerve endings in my vulva and labia are switched on. It's really uncomfortable and some months worse than others.
I also have the odd sprouting nipple hair and the manky ear piercing gunk.
I get the nervous/excited diarrhoea and also get diarrhoea when I have my period - most people seem to get constipated.

@Nottheduchessofcambridge

Bum hair trap yes, defo. Pooing in Labour, not on my first but yes on my second which I’d never have known if my husband hadn’t brought it up afterwards.

Pain in arse? Sometimes I get muscle cramp so bad up there I have to take cocodamol, it’s called something Fugax.
Anyone have large nipples that they accidentally trap when turning over in bed? I have to wear a soft bra as many a time I’ve woken up in pain as they’ve been pinched.
Also yes to trapped wind doggy style, sometimes we have to stop as I’m sure it creates too much pressure and my womb will inflate like a beach ball!

Omg yes, I try to roll over in bed and pin them under my elbow. Oh the pain.

@DreamingInColours @MisiSam @Couchbettato
That sounds like javelin arse. DH gets it too, so not only women.

@TastyTicklemore the vagina injury is very much a real thing. On any vertical water slides usually the ones where the platform drops away you have to cross your ankles. Partly to stop you breaking your legs but also to stop water having a clear access to the vagina.

There was an article about a woman who was on holiday, I think it was Spain, and she claimed they didn't tell her to cross her ankles and she ruptured her uterus from the force of the water must have been in absolute agony.

Does anyone else have a little pointy bit of skin above their arsehole? On the fanny side. I’ve had it all my life, it’s not a pile and it’s bloody annoying

[quote SaltyMermaid]@TastyTicklemore the vagina injury is very much a real thing. On any vertical water slides usually the ones where the platform drops away you have to cross your ankles. Partly to stop you breaking your legs but also to stop water having a clear access to the vagina.

There was an article about a woman who was on holiday, I think it was Spain, and she claimed they didn't tell her to cross her ankles and she ruptured her uterus from the force of the water must have been in absolute agony.[/quote]
OMG, that's awful!

Then maybe the Damon Hill story is TRUE !

Yes to all of the above except not had the shooty bum pains yet....

@FelicityBeedle

Does anyone else have a little pointy bit of skin above their arsehole? On the fanny side. I’ve had it all my life, it’s not a pile and it’s bloody annoying

YES!!

Re period poos. I read somewhere that it's to do with the signals that are sent to your uterus to evacuate the lining. Because your lower bowel is geographically close, it gets some of the signal too, so evacuates what it can

AnotherSoddingWalk (excellent username by the way) and others weirded out by their bodies apparently being turned on by weird stuff, you might be intersted reading Emily Nagoski's 'Come As you are'. She explains why physical symptoms we usually interpret as meaning we are turned on (getting wet for example) don't actually mean that necessarily. Ugh i am explaining it badly but it's a very interesting book and might put your mind at rest if it's something that bothers you.

Sometimes I will get a pain like someone has stabbed me up the bum, only lasts a second and it's really sharp!

Arse Javelin! Mumsnet even has a name for it, I read a thread on this precise issue not so long back and instantly recognised myself

Oddly enough after giving birth it's gone away and never came back.

Oops hit send too soon.

And you can't. Move. You have to stand and cling to the nearest immovable object until it's passed ...

@Wavienewbie

AnotherSoddingWalk (excellent username by the way) and others weirded out by their bodies apparently being turned on by weird stuff, you might be intersted reading Emily Nagoski's 'Come As you are'. She explains why physical symptoms we usually interpret as meaning we are turned on (getting wet for example) don't actually mean that necessarily. Ugh i am explaining it badly but it's a very interesting book and might put your mind at rest if it's something that bothers you.

Thank you, will check it out.

Poo in labour? Ds 1 I don't know, but with DS2's home water birth DH was given custody of the poo sieve, and he applied himself very diligently to his duties!

Ha ha yes to so many. Definitely bum trap hair and suctioning vagina!

LouNatics Wed 03-Feb-21 12:46:01
I have never fished hair out of my bum crack and I wear mine long. So it can’t be universal.

Tight arse.

I can not believe that I just read through this thread, then went on Instagram and saw this post totally at random!!

www.instagram.com/p/CKwwxKsD46d/?igshid=1nvc0z6qq5bp4

[quote SaltyMermaid]@TastyTicklemore the vagina injury is very much a real thing. On any vertical water slides usually the ones where the platform drops away you have to cross your ankles. Partly to stop you breaking your legs but also to stop water having a clear access to the vagina.

There was an article about a woman who was on holiday, I think it was Spain, and she claimed they didn't tell her to cross her ankles and she ruptured her uterus from the force of the water must have been in absolute agony.[/quote]
This is the main reason I'm yet to brave the vertical drop water slides. (We go to Florida a lot, or at least we did in the Beforetimes)

I can just imagine it ruining my holiday. UTI or worse.

@torquewench

My pubes are migrating upwards to my chin and down along the back of my legs and inner thighs. Havent had a wax since late November so Im glad its not shorts season ....

Yep, my legs currently resemble Mr Tumnus. I've got thick, dark hair and pale skin. Bit horrified to realise that other people don't have hairy thighs

Does anyone else have a little pointy bit of skin above their arsehole? On the fanny side. I’ve had it all my life, it’s not a pile and it’s bloody annoying.

Yes, mine is a skin tag. It think they’re very, very common. Apparently, that bit of extra skin acts like the pleat on a skirt (when going to the loo, I assume). I was told that if I had mine removed, it would only grow back again.

Just remembered another one, this is disgusting so be wary...

I have some sort of small cyst above my vag, near the top of where my pubes stop. It usually refills around my period, when I get the gruesome pleasure of draining it, and then lies low as a small red mark before rearing it's head at the next period.

Is this just me?

Arse daggers is definitely a thing and I'm sure it's linked to your cycle (but I'm only guessing). Since I've been through the menopause it's never happened.

Yes to the loo roll I swear it was the cause of thrush recently... I’d accidentally bought scented too so a double awfulness

Diarrhea/loose stool when you get AF?? Normal all month (stool wise) then as soon as AF comes its loose all week.. weird!

@AnotherSoddingWalk thank you so much for posting that! I get those twinges if I'm watching something like You've Been Framed and see someone falling over or crashing into something and thought I must be a psychopath so I'm really relieved it's not just me. Funnily enough it's only if I'm watching TV, not if I see something in real life.