What my DD told nursery - make me feel better please

[Retrovibe89]

This is probably going to be such a non issue but this is my first child so the first time I’ve encountered this. DD is almost 2 and apparently told one of the staff at nursery today “mummy naughty. Mummy shouting. Daddy crying” so they have just been on the phone and I think they think I abuse my husband please make me feel better that this is just toddler rambling!!!!

DS told nursery he had been given ‘magic mushrooms’ for his tea.

That was an interesting conversation with the glacial nursery manager, particularly as she thought DS was livelier than usual the next day. I have never given mind altering substances to my DS!

I had told him they were special mushrooms as they were the flat brown ones rather then the usual white ones!

DS3 says he’s “scared of” stuff he doesn’t want to do. So “scared of bed”, “scared of nursery” etc.

DH picked him up from nursery, and he was busy playing and didn’t want to come home. Cue massive tantrum and shouting “I’m scared of Daddy! I’m scared of going home!”

Thank fuck nursery have seen this in action before, and know it is all just toddler dramatics.

I helped out at playgroup (back when they were a thing organised by parents)
There was a sweet little toddler in the home corner with a baby doll. She was gently rocking the baby softly singing "go to fucking sleep" over and over.
If anything summed up having a toddler and a new born it was that moment.

@SpiderinaWingMirror definitely!

My three year old told nursery once 'daddy tried to make me get in bed with him but I don't want to touch his willy'.

MORTIFIED! Baby brother had been screaming and screaming with teething but hates co sleeping so as I had tried to settle him DH had asked DD if she wanted to come into our bed to sleep at 4am as DS was keeping her up. DH does sleep naked but would put boxers on if she was in the bed. It must be so hard to sort out for teachers what is childrens interpretation of things and what is real. I would check if I had any concerns so don't mind them checking up on things!

My 3 yo told nursery a few weeks ago that I was cross and I had hit him. I was cross because he had hit me .

My ds when he was 5 wrote in his news book - my mum went to the pub and left me and my cousin. Failed to mention his cousin was 19 and a nursery nurse .
Same ds had a habit of following me about quietly , I turned in kitchen not realising he was there holding a plate and bruised his forehead . He told the teacher his mum hit him over the head with a plate 🙈

You don't have to engage with them past an initial call btw, and they have no right to see your child without your permission.
I used to have a lot of respect for SS but recently that has completely gone.
You can't always trust them and they can cock up big time at a whole dept level.
Our complaint saw the HOD and 2 others leave the authority, I just hope they weren't employed in another.

Sadly little kids can tell of things that happen to them.. at least the school phoned to check all was ok.
Don’t worry about it too much.

When my niece was 6 she told her teacher Dsis goes off at night while she minds her baby brother. Teacher knew she was fibbing.

My now 6 year old told her keyworker at Nursery I never feed her.

When going through court with her dad over custody, she told the social worker that I make her eat vegetables until she's sick. She told the same social worker I only give her cake for breakfast.

She's told her headteacher that I never buy her any clothes (thats sort of true as I get given a lot of 2nd hand ones that are in good condition I do buy new though).

Dd told the nursery lady I was mean to the baby , didn’t feed the baby & put the baby in a box.
I was quite confused when they started up a conversation at pick up about dd’s baby sister - the baby in question was a doll!

When my daughter was six I picked her up from school and the convo went like this

Mummy, I’ve a present for you!
Oh thank you darling, what is it?
You have to guess mummy
Ok, did you make it?
No, I found it on the ground outside.
Ok,,, can I have more clues
Yes, it’s brown
Um,,brown and you found it on the ground, any more clues
Yes, it’s,,,em,,,organic
You found something brown and organic on the ground and want to give it to me?
Yes mummy. It’s wrapped it in toilet paper in my bag

By this point I’m proper side eying her excited little face and really concerned,,so

Darling it’s ehrm,,,not dog shit is it?
No! It’s an acorn...
Oh, that’s lovely, of course it’s not dog shit, silly mummy,,,

😂

My friend's DS once loudly declared in a toilet cubicle "Mummy, leave my willy alone!" (He was insisting on standing for a wee and was far too short for the toilet, so without aiming assistance would have created a huge mess!)

They'll take these things with a pinch of salt @Retrovibe89 - if your DC regularly said things like this they might be a bit more concerned, but a one off comment I would hope they'd just make a note (even if it's just a mental one) and only worry about it if it happened more regularly.

You've nothing to worry about (unless you are really abusing your husband lol!).

My D.C. had homework. The word was ‘big’. Cue the following sentence:
My mum has a very big bum
And even drew a picture to go along with it.

My DH worked at an abattoir and meat factory. Ds was fascinated by this and spent ages asking Daddy
‘ and then what happens, and then what’s next?’ This went on for ages, we gave no thought to it...
Until the day, Ds teacher asked for ‘a word’ after class. She produced a very detailed and very colourful montage of a cows life from birth, through the factory process and into the shop... No detail was spared... It was SO accurate, that the teacher wanted reassuring that Ds did not spend all his spare time putting in shifts at the factory!! The little darling was about 8 at the time.
His DF was the ‘star’ in every single one of the pictures😳
Often wonder what she really thought of us...

DD wrote a very graphic account of mums day at work. Apparently I went to Pizza Express for lunch every day to drink wine - you try explaining to Sister ( it was a catholic prep school) it was once!

• "My mummy has twin boys in her tummy, we are calling them Michael and Phil" (I was not pregnant, just a bit fat)

• When asked what her daddy does for a job, responded "My daddy watches TV" (he was gainfully employed full time in an office)

• Yesterday I helped Grandpa cut open a lion's head and I saw its brain (this one was true, Grandpa is a zoo vet - and it's the only one of many unlikely stories that the teacher questioned!).

Oh and lifting up her shirt to show two almost perfectly round burns on her stomach (acquired when fat spat from a frying pan, after she disobeyed a clear and firm instruction to stay out of the kitchen) "My mummy burned me". My neighbour who works with at risk children told me they looked like cigarette burns. I had to call daycare about that one...

When my daughter was about 8, she nodded off at school; the teacher asked if she was getting enough sleep, her response was that we had been to the funfair until 12 o’clock. So when I collected her from school, I was summoned to “have a word” with the teacher. He looked rather sceptical when I told him that we had not been near a funfair for 6 months and she was in bed by 7:30. Bloody kids :-)

My 5 year old's class were discussing what they wanted to be when they grew up . My DD announced that she wanted to be a stripper like her Mum.
We were decorating and I had been having great fun with the steam wallpaper stripper

We took DD to two funerals when she was 4 - my Gran and DH's gran died within a month of each other.

DD told all the children in her group about how she had been to see her dead grannies in their boxes and reassured the other children that you get your own box when you die, you don't have to share.

Don't think nursery were expecting that conversation opener from her during snack time.