DH's obsession or whatever. It's not normal is it.. what should I do?

[NewSchmooo]

Today there was a mix up at work with my shifts and I came home from work only 45 minutes after I'd left.

I found my DH of 7 years naked on the bed surrounded by all the stainless steel kicten implements that we possess and rubbing a knife sharpener gently up and down an intimate area of his body. He was very aroused. He even had pot pourii candles burning and soft lighting.

I knew something was amiss as soon as I came in because it was so quiet and I just had this intinct but I had been putting the bin out for tomorrow so came in through the conservatory and he didn't hear. I just opened the bedroom door (we live in a bungalow) and there he was.

I know its not another woman but what do I do about this. And the softlighting and stuff; he hasn't made that much effort with me for years.

I don't know what to do. Has anyone ever heard on this? A knife sharpener for goodness sake. I feel sick. Have obviously changed my name for this.

Just make sure that it is ^milk" in the tea...

Oh right Norma stanley.. rooting for me, I take it THAT'S a reference to grow bags to. Glad to amuse

it was actually a very romantic occasion. The grow bags where just the softest surface in the garage. We didn't have the office built on then mores the pity as this has a sofa bed in it.

we are taking the piss because of the unnecessary extra details

it is not because we do not know what to say

she is making it too easy

I'm getting ring round my bum sitting on this colander waiting for Special's spunk story.

So once as a young gal, I went to a party and got a bit drunk and was persuaded by a chap to ..er.. pleasure him orally. My first time - ah, so romantic. In the room where the buffet was set out.

Says I, "oh alright, but you're not coming in my mouth".

[Like Dickens, I'm publishing in episode form]

Go and talk to him dressed like this Might make the gro-bag incident seem tame.

Please, please tell me this is a wind up - haven't laughed this much all day. Would hate to think that my mirth was over a genuine plea for help.

ROFL! Martha!!!

I wish my dp would get off on kitchen utensils,would save me the bother when he pokes me in the back i could just hand him the tea strainer.

The milk pan was for catching semen in TheLady. I thought I'd explained. Except on this occasion he missed and its on my Laura Ashley duvet cover. Unless HE'S changed it. He should have really.

i can't talk to him yet. How can he make this ok. He was caressing his penis with the shaft of my Gerber knife sharperner. I will have to buy an electric one now and I have never found them as effective.

How can I talk to him with that image in my head? Could you?

The night of the lonnnnnnnnnnnnng knives.

It should hopefully pan out.

Oh yes!

I would stick with Gerber...definately.

god you are such a trophy wife

I am sure you can iron out your differences

Don't think she's finished yet, Speccy

can you get an edward scissorhands outfit?

Unecessary details?? You mean like the marigolds? I felt you needed to know that because you all thought I was making a fuss about nothing.

Oh and apparently he was talking German, not french but he HASN'T EXPLAINED WHY!

We're waiting Special - Is this available in boxed set?

Why do you need an electric one?

Really - you should steel yourself and go and talk to him.

kitchen porn