Anyone want to come and mourn the reality vs expectation of new purchases with me?

[Swimminguphill]

I bought this beautiful jacket online. In my mind I'd look like Blondie in the 80s, very rock and roll and all round awesome. In reality I look like a giant angry teddy bear/yeti. I have broad shoulders and a bust although slim in general, and it doesn't do me any favours. I wanted it for ages and it's now sold out, and so the joy of getting it in my size just in time is sadly wasted. It is a beautiful jacket - just not on me! Anybody else want to come and mourn reality vs fantasy with me?

I had an unfortunate encounter with a velvet floral pair of dungarees that looked lovely online, but clung to my post c section pooch in ways I will never forget.

I bought a sequin jacket that I'd spotted on Instagram. I looked like Lionel Blair in it.

I bought Cherry Red Dr Marten Chelsea boots (the 2976, very round toe, unisex ones). Expectation - slightly rock chick, hipster outfits because my black laceups make me feel awesome.

Reality - clown shoes

Oh these are priceless! Thank you everyone, now laughing not mourning. I genuinely think that some pieces just don't ever look the same IRL than they do online/in pictures... It's not us it's them, right?

Cos skirt. I wanted to look scandi effortless cool. I looked like a Triangle.

Printed jumper. I wanted a slightly quirky alternative to plain knits for winter. the reality was I looked like a Toddler.

I like that jacket though.

I bought this dress for a party. In my head I looked like an older Pippa Middleton.
The reality is that I look like a middle aged housewife attending her husband's firm's annual dinner dance at a Berni Inn.
www.debenhams.com/webapp/wcs/stores/servlet/prod_10701_10001_54510+203490351_-1

I looked like Lionel Blair That has got to be the funniest thing I've read all day.

SmileChuck you too can look like an angry teddy in a few days when the one I return goes back online

It's funny how it's the things we have greatest hopes for that are the most disappointing. I never get this upset about wellies or anoracks.

Thank you. Having a shitty day and am pissing myself laughing at these!

These are great.

This happens to me alot. That's why I do lots of returns.

I look pretty good in a clingy mini, I have good legs, my arse is ok.

Repeatedly over the last couple of winters i've gone in full of hope and tried on ..... a Skater Skirt.

''Hmm, nice with opaques and my suede boots i think. Not much different to my straight ones surely ...''

Nope.

Every.single.time i just look like a hippo in a bloody tutu and get depressed :(

This Cos dress: https://www.cosstores.com/gb/Women/Dresses/Knitteddressswithwovennskirt/46881-76919558.1#c-24479

It's a gorgeous colour. I thought it looked great in the changing room. Whenever I wear it I feel like a pregnant toddler.

That Cos dress looks so unflattering.

I bought the red Zara frayed edge coat and looked like a member of a Beatles tribute act. Also spent £400 on a beautiful soft leather jacket only to see Suzi Quattro's fat nan staring back at me in the mirror.

Every bloody thing I buy on eBay. I never learn.

Mom jeans.
I look like a mom, and not in a good way.
My latest purchase was an oversized coat. I wanted to look all effortlessly instacool and laidback chic.
I look like a tramp in it.

Every bloody thing I buy on eBay. I never learn.

This.

A gorgeous grey leather biker jacket, it was beautiful but definitely not on me. I looked like a Hell's Angel's nan in it.

A navy Burberry Mac

Homeless art teacher

Boyfriend jeans.

I look like a boy friend

I bought this on the strength of the reviews, as it clearly flatters absolutely every figure...

...except mine. I am 5'4", a size 8-10 and reasonably in proportion, but this made me look like I had no waist and the biggest thunder thighs in the kingdom.

Have returned it. :(

I can't provide a link but I bought a full length black strap on evening dress.
I expected Angelina Jolie when her posed leg ended up with its own twitter account.

I looked like Morticia Addams' fat sister

Arf at Suzi Quatro's fat nan.

I bought a Cos top thinking I would ooze minimalist chic. I looked like a child had drawn me with blunt crayons.