If teenagers were on AIBU

[drinkswineoutofamug]

My mums a right biddy. Right I can roll my school skirt up 3 times to get it short. Maxine says it’s well good and Darren says I have nice legs. But OMG my biddy mum says she can see my breakfast when I bend over! I mean OMG! Really! Says I’m not going out the house like that. She’s so old . She’s 35 and knows nothing about being a teenager. She still used a tin can and string to talk to her old biddy mates. Aibu?

Tupperware - youre so right, my cowbag interferes with my school trips too. She said I could go on my geography trip but it was only to Lulworth in Dorset. I know she made the school go there instead of Seychelles. Shes always in talking to teachers about me, trying to stuff up my life. And Im supposed to be pleased we're going to Iceland on a faaaamily holiday. Jeez

Omg right, like me and my BFF Shanice, like, love Ed sheeran right. So my mum surprises us with 2 tickets for early Christmas presents, which is unreasonable in itself right. And we are well happy innit, until mum says that her and her BFF are coming too! Like how bad is that?! Oh my days, what even is she chatting on? She says we will make a weekend of it like. Go shopping, stay in nice spa hotel like, but me and Shanice love Ed Sheeran, like how is Ed Sheeran gonna meet us and fall in love with us if mum and auntie Sharon are there too. Like omg I can’t even. We love ed sheeran, mum doesn’t love Ed Sheeran.

I will never live this down like omg

Ffs why won’t my mum like just give me the extra cash I need for my fucking PS4 game now? AIBU to think the right cow should respect my human right to my leisure time and not make me wait until I get my next allowance. Ffs she’s expecting to wait and everything. So fucking unfair.

My mum bitches on about me needing to actually chew my food...and not eat roast dinner with my bare hands. I mean, nobody got time for that, FFS.

Oh yeah and she grounded me on a night that EVERYONE is going out. Won’t even let me change the day to a day when no one is out. So unfair.

Don’t even mention my dad. He’s a dickhead. Moaning on about £120 being too much for a jacket I’m gonna rip and the answer is no. I’m not exactly gonna wear Primark, am I?!

Oh yeah and this fucking iPhone is shit, who even has one this old?! They need to buy me the 8.

OMG and can’t believe they expect me to pick up my boxers off the bathroom floor what is up with that?

All I said is can I have a snack? Can I have Nike Huaraches? Can I have money for Pizza Hut? When’s tea? And they went off on one saying “after the way you just spoke to me?!” AIBU?????

Omg my mother is such a tight bitch. She works and gets child benefit for me and like £60 a month from my old man for maintenance. I told her that she should give me the maintenance money cos it is mine to spend when I go in town with my mates, you know I need a cheeky nando’s And costa. The stupid tight cow laughed at me, and said ‘dream on’ Omg she’s like so unreasonable. (Based on my actual dd1)

I am the only person in the whole world without an iPhone 8. They hardly cost any money but my parents obviously don't love me enough to get me one. My mother is refusing to accept that my life is OVER. Its soooo unfair.

OMG, there is worse too. I think my parents still have sex . They are both over 40 - it's totally disgusting and perverted. I found out when I went through mum's drawers looking for evidence searching for my PE kit and found some contraceptive pills. Eeuurgh!! I've been a bit off with them since, and barge into their room without knocking sometimes just so they don't get any ideas. They sicken me.

My old cowbag of a mother actually expects me to get a job at McDonald's or KFC...........ffs is she actually mentally ill or somefink??? I GO there, I couldn't possibly work there.........Im 16, she gets money for me so should surely carry on supporting me till I am an adult.....at 25 ish........I didn't ask to be born!!!

So I called my Mum at work today, cos I was literally starving, and asked her to go to KFC for me on the way home as there's this new burger that looks AMAZING. Bloody bitch said no, we've got food at home. Yeah, but literally NO nice food, all pasta and vegetables and shit, NOONE eats that. AND she had a go at me for calling her at work when she's busy, it's not like she does anything at work any way, she just sits in an office all day drinking tea.

I hate my life.

My mother keeps telling me to get a job...how unfair is that.
I'm 16 and at college 3 days a week!

Doesn't she understand how tired I am from all that bus transport and doing coursework?

AND she had a go at me for calling her at work when she's busy, it's not like she does anything at work any way, she just sits in an office all day drinking tea.

OMG this is sooo my mum. She’s always moaning that she’s tired and stressed from work when all she does is drink coffee and chat to her mates about Bake Off. I mean why does she even go there if it makes her so moody with me.

This is like the worst holiday evvvvveeeerrrr... bitchface says I can't get a tattoo cause I'm only 17! FFS I only want a tiny heart just under my left tit she's got like a million eight tattoos so fuck knows what her issue is! I'm totally going to sneak out when she's sleeping & get the tattoo anyway it's totally the same as when she got her belly button pierced at 13 without grans permission so she won't be able to say anything!

I'm 16 and at college 3 days a week!

Me too, witches, although I can't even do any of my coursework as they send it to you electronically and I've lost my log in details.

Literally every day my mum is like 'have you sorted your log in yet'? - she's so extra! She should be pleased I'm making friends and socialising with nice people for a change, but instead she keeps going on about how I'm already behind with my work!

I literally don't know what she wants me to do about it - it's not my fault I can't see the work that's being set if they hide it behind a password-protected system...she should blame the college!!

Oh dear lord, you lot have absolutely nothing to whinge about. Yesterday I appeared like a gorgeous sleepy headed little darling (19 and 5,10) at 3PM (, let's agree, middle of the effing night) what do I find.... Dad is playing his crap game on (my) supposedly shared playstation, Mum (she who is EMBARRASSING) is making cakes and they have found the weed me and my mates (still asleep, lucky bastards so didn't witness said behaviour from the embarrassing ones). They had only gone and smoked it!! They don't even tell me to study, clean my room or change my bed any more apparently I am old enough to sort myself out. Bloody parents. Can't win with them. Keep it up guys, we will win. Bastards also, also when asked what was for breakfast... it's past lunchtime they say, what the fuck! told them I hadn't eaten for hours. You know what they did, rolled around laughing as I been asleep for 12 hours(apparently) and don't get me started on money and house chores. I need money who cares (apart from the embarrassing one) if the place I use as a hotel is tidy. They have also bought me 2 suitcases for my birthday and counting the days til I go to uni. 1 YEAR later than expected. Suffer you parents. I will be back

Definitely a contender for Classics!!!!

She’s so extra

Okay peeps I need some help.......i've been in the old hags room borrowing her stuff, it's all shite but needs must.......and I saw some pics of her in her yoof when she 'travelled'.....I know, pretentious or what! Anyhow, some of her old 'lovers' (puke) were actually quite fit.......how the fuck did my old bitch of a mother ever get with fit blokes??? I mean she must be nearly 80 now (48)......I'm actually traumatised.............

AND she had a go at me for calling her at work when she's busy, it's not like she does anything at work any way, she just sits in an office all day drinking tea

OMG this is sooo my mum

Mine too. I text her when she was at college about the boiler not working. She didn't reply, so I text her again and again and again. Bitch replied 'Dood, am at college. Stop.'

That's it. Just stop. Like, I needed a bath and she's all like, dood, leave me alone. Doesn't she realise your kids are supposed to be the most important thing in the world? Sooo neglectful. Should I call Childline?

See ...my parents are ok, but occasionally get daft ideas, think they read the Daily Mail. Anyway dad says that before he will pay for my expensive specialist training for my dream job I have to get and keep a job for a couple of years. So I get a sales job in a shop. I did my probation period and proved that I am the best they ever had. my opinion so I told the supervisor that when I have my end of probation period review that I expect a substantial pay rise. Dad says that they should know I'm worth it. For some reason she laughed and showed me the company pay scales...25p an hour pay rise...if they agree...OMG ...that is fuckin nuts..I'm worth at least a 3k pay rise and another in a few months after that too. So I demanded a meeting straight away...the manager laughed at me!! How dare she...I told her she needs me...and she laughed again...OMG these people are stupid...no wonder the economy is shit when they won't pay 17 year olds at least 25k in a retail shop job. My dad wasn't happy neither he agrees with me.

True story...very entitled young man

So I was moaning about having to get a bus to school and Mum said that I had to chosen to go there and she'd checked the journey with me but like I'm fed up of it now and it's her fault I chose there.

So she says I will have to get the bus to college and work after I leave school but I said I can't be bothered with college and am going to go straight be being in my job that needs a degree in 30k start right.

She said I won't get into x uni for that course with no gcses cause I ain't doing them cause they've put me in set one and it means I have to put any effort in Ffs. I threw a right shit fit cause she should believe that I can fucking get into uni with no qualifications at all and the bitch doesn't believe I can.

Anyway I'll show her. I told her I don't want to do gcses and I don't want to go to college and if I do go to college and uni I am working in a part time job while I do cause she can pay for me.

Or I can claim benefits and do nothing and not work cause she thinks I will starve but my mates Dad is on benefits and he is fat so clearly she's being dramatic.

That should say NOT working part time while at college or uni.

I've been growing several new life forms in my room over the last months. My mother removed them over the weekend. Even worse she put the containers in the dishwasher on a boil wash. Well when I fail A level biology it's def her fault

Aibu to think I may need therapy? Last night I saw my mum and dad acting out the final dance from that really old film dirty dancing after getting drunk on gin and lager. Their mates Sharron and Paul were filming it on snap chat.

They clearly don't know what will happen if this gets round school. It will ruin my whole life. What if I brought my mates back? I don't know what to do? Shall I LTBs?

And fuck rinsing off shiz from my plate after dinner right? Ain’t that what the dishwasher is for? Wtf do I need to rinse off my peas and shit?

Now she’s bitching cos of blocked drains or summink.

She so triggered. Ain’t no-one got time for this shit. PS4 is Calling