Read the Damn Post! AIBU

[HairsprayBabe]

This really gets my goat and I probably need to chill the fuck out but I find it so annoying!

Someone will post an AIBU e.g.
DD (9) has done X,Y & Z, I think she is old enough to know better DH disagrees and she is just a kid still WIBU?

Followed by a flood of posters - How old is DD? What age is your daughter? etc....

Sometimes the answer to the question is in the thread title FGS [facepalm]

Some threads are long, I get that but at least read the blinking OP before responding! AIBU and this is something I shouldn't care about?

It's understandable for a goat though, what with the EU cheese quotas.

I have read the full thread (I refuse to use your silly acronyms!) and cannot fathom why no-one has suggested the original poster gets her dear goat a mooncup?!
Problem solved.

Happy to help

A moon cup? For a goat?

Wull that help with the unchilled fucks poisoning and zoflora illness?

My mistake Caz I barely glanced at skim read the post as I am multitasking RN. Batch cooking, washing the curtains and Marie Kondoing the DGoats room.

Was the goat a free birthed goat ?

DG is 8 yes?

Surely old enough to Marie Kondo his/her own room. My DG were cleaning their own rooms, doing their own laundry and cooking simple meals like beef Wellington by the age of 6.

It sounds like are raising an entitled, lazy and narcissistic goat OP

Do they provide goat husbandry lessons in your area OP. You really need to get a grip of the situation

Unbelievable! Marie needs to FOTTOSOFO!!! She's an entitled cunt who needs to buy her own fucking condo. Does she have form for this?

The goat has been trying to kill you?!! You must be in shock.

Have some sweet tea.

Have you noticed the goat being secretive with their phone recently?

Obviously I haven't RTFT (why the hell would I want to do that?) but am shocked and disgusted by the "liberal" attitude that you people have that encourages goats to "identify" as llamas, alpacas, she and even DUCKS AND UNICORNS!

(incensed dance of uncontrollable rage>

It is people like you that have caused all of the trouble in the world from famine to war and interfering busybodies commenting on falafel wraps in Tesco.

CROSS-SPECIES IDENTIFICATION IS AGAINST GOD AND NATURE AND WILL LEAD TO ARMAGEDDON!

Now all of you - Bugger Off! And Good Day To You!

*sheep

Just to make sure all your bases are covered - Have you contacted Ofsted? Teachers frequently pick on some kids.

There might be a perfectly innocent explanation for your goat buying viagra on the internet - but have to say, it doesn't look good OP

Am I on the right thread?

Hi - Just wondering if anyone had ever had the experience of reading a thread and starting to wonder if it's actually about you ? Probably being paranoid, but any advice welcomed!

I can't remember whether you've said if you've tried shopping at Aldi or Lidl OP?

Have any of you lovely ladies tried the sheep excrement facial?

It's so in Vogue right now. Apparently the combination of glittery shit and piss glides effortlessly over the skin leaving you unrecognisable and is waaayyyy more effective than the bird poop facial.

AIBU to consider forking out £46735190089 for the glittery goat shit or should I stick with my usual sheep placenta facial? FWIW they also chuck in some naice ham.

TIA x

*goat

Teatowel YY. I saw that on QVC last night. The self-declared 'beauty expert' was raving about it. Was going going to stockpile until I saw the p&p!! I couldn't justify it. Daylight robbery.

Has the goat been checked for STD's? It sounds to me like he's been seeing prostitutes. Sorry.

I haven't RTFT obvs, but this the title is exactly what I say to my DH when I have yet another scrap backing into the drive.

The gate post should be RED, not beige, so that I actually see the fucker.

I'm sorry to hear about your goat though. Have you read 'How to talk so that your kids will listen, and listen so that your kids will talk? It really works!

Get a new goat on a groupon deal, I'm sure I saw a good offer there recently.

NRFT but LTB

Caz I didn't notice the p&p! Think I'll look on eBay probably counterfeit shit but as long as it's not human

I've major PIL issues. Last night we went out for a vv naice meal with DH's family. They're a bunch of pa bastards, especially SIL, but that's a whole other thread.
Anyways, I sneaked off to the loo and took a cheeky pic of my goatee just for DH. I royally fucked up and sent it put to the whole table instead, PIL included!
I didn't realise until FIL sent me one back of him shaving MIL's goat! Mortified doesn't cover it, wtaf?!

My NDN has painted their gateposts red.
It gives me the RAGE.
My DC are so distracted they can now only manage 6 hrs of piano practice a day.
I have logged it with the mythical database, but Ofsted are frankly useless.
Fumming