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Original poster

AIBU to ask you all for your most PFB moments?

295 replies

user1477282676 · 02/12/2016 10:17

I just fancy a laugh and there's a lot of traffic here. So...mine is that on DD1's first birthday, I made the entire room sing Happy Birthday to her in a WHISPER so that she wouldn't be scared by all the loud singing. Blush

And they all did it too! Grin Bless them.

Now you!

OP posts:
SpeckledyBanana · 04/12/2016 22:08

I called 111 for every little tiny thing with DC1 Blush

Last week I managed to completely fail to recognise that DC2 had Scarlet Fever Blush

monkeyfacegrace · 04/12/2016 22:26

You are all officially off your rockers.

People actually sit in the back of the car?! Really?!

Saying that, dd1 was weaned on organic home pureed parsnips.

Today, dd2 (20 months) had choc buttons, an ice cream and fudge cake desert, and a slush puppy.

Some of you must be exhausted Grin

Binglesplodge · 04/12/2016 22:32

I read most of these with great amusement. I think a lot of us have some something a bit mental with our PFB. When we were newly home from hospital with ours we had a power cut and my dh was worried that the candles we lit would somehow consume all the oxygen and suffocate pfb ds...

However ds is now 2 and if we're all in the car one of us still sits in the back with him. I'm trying to convince myself that's not pfb as it's come up so many times on this thread! We mainly do it for peace and quiet: he's noisy when he's bored in the car...

HeyRoly · 04/12/2016 22:40

Sitting in the back of the car with PFB is so PFB because if/when you have a second child, there's no longer any space for you to sit (assuming you have an average sized car with no room on the middle seat for an adult sized arse, that is).

DC2 has never had adult company in the back. Not once, not ever Grin

dietcokeandwine · 04/12/2016 22:42

I definitely went a bit mad on the PFB front with ds1.

Can remember my lovely aunt and uncle asking could they buy him (he was about to turn 2) a chocolate Easter egg. I was horrified at the thought Blush and bless them, they turned up on Easter Sunday with a packet of raisins for him instead (which were obviously vastly superior to a chocolate egg, despite the fact each raisin probably contains as much sugar as an entire chocolate egg).

Both ds2 and ds3 could identify a purple Cadbury wrapper by about 13m Grin

SalemSaberhagen · 04/12/2016 22:47

My 2yo DD hates the car. Detests it. Sitting in the back with her is the only way she will stop screaming to get out and 'cuddle mummy'. I'll continue!

LuluJakey1 · 04/12/2016 23:03

Last year (Ds's first Christmas) DH asked SIL to take the snaps out of the crackers so Ds was not scared. She did as he asked. Fils was forgotten about and Ds just giggled as it 'cracked'.

We would only give him boiled water until I caught him drinking from the cat bowl, since then he has had tap water.

cantmakeme · 04/12/2016 23:53

I was thinking the other day about how I had sat in the back seat taking my newborn PFB home from hospital after birth. I thought maybe that was a bit OTT, but see now that some people have continued for years!!

I did some other PFB stuff, will have to try to remember it all!

LauraPalmersBodybag · 05/12/2016 00:00

Christ alive, my dd is nearly a year and I'm still in the back of the car. She's just such a screamer I've never transitioned back to the passenger seat. I told my DH today that we really ought to have another baby so my hand is forced.... Blush

LauraPalmersBodybag · 05/12/2016 00:04

Oh, I was mental with the SIDS stuff too. Found it hard to sleep sometimes in case something awful happened and I wasn't aware. From 4-6 months i went to bed with her and read by a nightlight. Completely crazy!

I did have a friend whose DS died of SIDS though so it put the frighteners on me.

Still loopy though. Any subsequent children will not get the same treatment!

colourchameleon · 05/12/2016 00:07

Friend of mine who had child in S.Africa, first visit to England with child age 6:

"I don't want her playing outside. She isn't used to the terrain"

AldrinJustice · 05/12/2016 00:27

Haven't read the full thread but some of these are hilarious! I ended up moving DD to the front passenger seat because she cried in the back so DH is now confined to the back of the car 😂 (I'm always the driver).

I cried when she had to have her first formula milk bottle pre 6 months because the guidelines now encourage EBF for 6 months.

I used the change her vest everyday, put on a new outfit every day, with matching socks.

I used to tell everyone to wash their hands before touching her.

Anyone with a cough or other signs of illness I wouldn't let them go near her.

And of course military with what food was put in her mouth! I would police it so rigourously.

Oh, and I used to worry when she was in her car seat for longer than 2 hours at a time!

MommaGee · 05/12/2016 00:35

Is there a cut off point for the motion sensor so it's not a pfb thing? He's 18 months and it's still used

AldrinJustice · 05/12/2016 00:37

Oh gosh I used to warm the wipe on my own skin too. And yell at anyone who spoke loudly and woke DD up from a nap.

I'm probably one of the worser PFBers...

GraceGrape · 05/12/2016 00:48

I'm confused. How do those of you who sit in the back of the car manage when you are taking them out alone? Do you only ever use the car when there are two adults?

WoopityBoopity2 · 05/12/2016 01:09

I instigated war with my pfb's grandma over him smelling like perfume and her giving him chocolate biscuits. There were tears. We had a slanging match on the phone. We get along fine now Grin

I took pfb to the doctors and out of hours for poo based reasons about 10 times in 3 months, there was nothing wrong with him I just panicked as he only went once a week, which is normal when ebf apparently. (feel guilty for wasting those poor doctors time!)

I insisted that pfb was kept facing away from a Doctor Who Christmas special and my family must all keep the volume low as to not cause psychological damage.

Had a meltdown if anyone used a brand on pfb's skin that I'd not approved.

Original poster
user1477282676 · 05/12/2016 02:03

ALdrin giving the baby clean clothing daily isn't pfb! It's normal! Grin

OP posts:
MummyIsAFreeElf · 05/12/2016 02:05

*and are not to wear the same pjs to bed that night

MummyIsAFreeElf · 05/12/2016 02:16

Half my post disappeared lol
Pj days get fresh pjs as soon as they get up and aren't allowed to go to bed in the same ones

No cheap bottles or dummy's on my 3rd dc and they have never had a cheap one even in an emergency. MIL is notorious for cheap novelty ones that go straight in the bin, packet and all

Worse with dc3 than 1 or 2. Always refused to allow cuddles unless I watched hands washed up to the elbows with antibacterial soap and alcohol hand sanitiser but no one held dc3 for their first few visits. She was 5.5 weeks early and I am obsessed with making sure there's no risk of illness (she's nearly 5 months and still insist on hand washing and antibac)
Blankets are washed after one use (been like that with all three)
i sit in the backseat between my 5month old and my 22 month old. Haven't moved into the front from 22 month old was born and don't see it happening any time soon.

mummarichardson · 05/12/2016 02:20

My friend tried to make her mum come down the stairs on her bum whilst holding her PFB. Her mum refused!

ManaFleet · 05/12/2016 02:52

This thread has made me feel pretty good about my PFBness, I must say. The layers thing is just so bonkers, it's lovely!

DS is 5mths old so still doing a few barmy things:

  • Can't help laying a hand on his chest regularly overnight (not setting an alarm but waking just enough to do it) to make sure he's breathing.
  • I use special flannels (made for us by lovely friend) with tepid water rather than cold wetwipes (definitely very PFB!) unless we're out, in which case I warm them in my hands.
  • Only use organic baby products or coconut oil in his skin.
  • Not keen on strangers swooping into the pram without asking to stroke his face, but I cope.
  • I hate him smelling of perfume - nothing to do with baby smell but more to do with him smelling of someone else (MiL for example) as nothing I wear is strongly scented.
  • I've been known to change him if I don't like something he's wearing, unless DS is proud of his outfit choice in which case I tolerate it.
  • He will only have organic food while we do BLW because that's what we have and there will be no crap eaten by him even when we have treats (junk, chocolate, whatever).
  • I get extremely agitated by smokers whether I'm walking past / through clouds of smoke at the bus stop or someone hasn't washed hands before touching him - I think this is normal though.

Reading all that back, I'm quite a lot more PFB than I had thought...

ManaFleet · 05/12/2016 02:54

That should say DH is proud of his outfit choice (sometimes quite odd), DS couldn't give a crap what he wears as long as he can suck the cuffs.

Thistledew · 05/12/2016 04:01

I was worried that to the outside world we would appear desperately pfb- we removed the door knocker when I went into labour and didn't put it back up until DS was over a week old.

However, this was in fact due to us having the front of the house painted on the weekend that I went into labour and then being too preoccupied with the new baby to bother sorting it out for a few days. It did give me a laugh at the time when I wondered what our friends and neighbours must have been thinking of us.

I think my only truly pfb moments came in those first few weeks when I felt like no other parent could possibly think their baby as perfect and be so consumed by love as I was. I soon got a grip and realised it was perfectly normal though!

Just thought of another - I bought a plastic toy for DS when he was about 8 weeks old and thought it would be good to put it in the steriliser before giving it to him. It promptly melted.

wineusuallyhelps · 05/12/2016 05:54

This thread is funny!

With DS1 we used warm water and cotton wool every time we changed his nappy for weeks (why?!). DS2 it lasted about 3 days before we started using wet wipes (warmed in our hands). DS3 had cold wipes slapped on him from his first nappy change Grin

Kind of sums up my parenting attitude towards them ever since. DS3 is the most laid back and self-sufficient.....!

Qwertie · 05/12/2016 07:56

With my pfb; whenever I took him out in the pram, I would stare adoring at him the whole time & I remember thinking what monsters the other mums I saw were, because sometimes they weren't even looking at their baby. With dc3; if I remembered to get his carrycot off the kitchen table & actually put it on the pram before I went out of the door, I considered it a good day!Xmas Wink