Someone has nicked my username!

[QueenMortificado]

Name changed to this off the back of another thread a few weeks ago where I used the word Mortificado and my previous name had had Queen in it

Today I see someone else is now registered as TheQueenMortificado.

Wtf. It's myyyyy name. Aren't there rules around plagiarism like this???

TQM if you see this come forward and explain yourself!

I don't mind Pax, as long as nothing too controversial is said, don't want anyone dragging down the good Morty name now!

I might use it for some proper bunfights at 2am about parking or bins.

You, uh, need some help with the good Morty name there cousin?

DONT YOU DARE PAX

You'll be banished from the kingdom and written out any chance of getting your mitts on the crown

Queen, I understand we'll be meeting every week for briefing sessions. I am most looking forward it.

I must warn you, I'll need a drawing room which can accommodate a creature the size of a house.

Oh, you're back. And I see you have backup. Scary backup.

...Don't suppose you're in the market for a stunt double?

Ooooh yes please Faux!

If anyone upsets us we can tell them to MortiFUCKOFFdo right?!

Isn't that the executioner's job?

I can post about definitely not having big piles though, so everyone thinks it's you

Look, if you're going to be my double, you've got to act like me ok. I'd definitely tell one to fuck off.

I'd love to see you starting a thread titled "I don't have big piles". Let's see where that gets ya shall we

I'm having a drunken moment of regret. Kate dear, Zeus owes me one - I'm sure if you ask nicely he'll resurrect you too in time for the end of the thread. You miserable pleb

Oi you lot I'm still here. I'll thank you to pay homage to the Queen currently on the throne.

By my calculation Executioner can't lay a finger on me until close of business on Saturday 3rd December 2016. I get a full 9 days in charge.

This is not my doing. I am a pawn of my uncle.

Did we ever get the garden furniture back from NextDoorToThe Mortificados? That's what you should be sorting out Executioner.

I don't know how PrinceMortificado was arranging a wedding with the Peasant MiddleClassTificado. I thought he was still in the Tower. Where the hell is UncleMortificado? He's the one actually in charge; he'll know what's really going on.

Right, wedding kaput, wine cellar emptied by the assorted clergy, the plebs want to chose a leader and it is unclear just how many queens we have .

I'll grab the gin and join some petty squabble on AIBU if anyone needs me.

Jane, Guildford - bit of an embarrassing snaffoo. Turns out I'm incredibly loyal to QueenMortificado after all - I don't know what I was thinking before, all a colossal joke. Ha ha ha. All got a bit out of hand. Funny stuff. Also I'm a catholic again now. Alright there Pope?

Your majesty, please don't execute me. Take them instead, they're the ones who raided the treasury to make blinkin' gold coins with their faces on.

HEAR YE! YE CITIZENS OF MORTIFICADO DRAW NEAR AND GIVE YOUR ATTENTION

I REMIND YOU OF THE ROYAL PROCLAMATION OF LADYJANEMORTIFICADO QUEEN OF NINE DAYS

THAT HENCEFORTH

THEM WHAT WANTS TO ASSERT THAT THEY IS TRUE CITIZENS OF MN MORTIFICADO

SHALL FOREVER MORE ADD TO THE LIST OF POMBEARS ETC AND OTHER EVIDENTIAL CRAP THE NAME OF MORTIFICADO.

OTHERWISE THEY SHALL BE CAST OUT AND SPURNED AS UNTRUTHFUL INFIDELS OF THE PARISH

HEAR YE! HEAR YE! HEAR YE!

UNCLEMORTIFICADO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What sayest thou?

Thou have ripped me untimely from my quiet peaceful aristocratic life for this????

I need a priest.

Don't bottle it all up like that.

ExecutionerMortificado

I'm still in charge and have a few days left.

Please would you be so good as to Despatch UncleMortificado. I think you and I have our own appointment after close of business on 3rd December.

I don't really see why he should get off scott free having sent me to my doom (And then changed his mind).

You'll need to be quick though - my authority is very temporary.

Teenagers

Zeus owes me one

I thought Zeus had already "given you one" Princess

UncleMortificado - you can be catholic again as far as I'm concerned. I'm now PopeinExile due to there being too much excitement and axes in Mortificado, and what with the real QueenMortificado being away, and the Princess dropping sprogs, laying eggs, eating her own young, and performing countless other abominations, many with the old, excommunicated Pope and a drunken nun - well, it was too much for my holy self to tolerate.

However, I would be delighted to welcome you back into the fold, for a small fee.

LadyJaneMortificado - you require a priest?

I am a former Pope and would be delighted to assist you in whatever is needed, for only a small fee.

As you wish, your queenlyness...
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/thirty_days_only/2792781-I-dont-have-big-piles

UncleMortificado - in the vent of the ExecutionerMortificado catching up with you, I do a very nice line in Last Rites, and only charge a small fee.

My niece will, I'm sure, settle my debts

She has some very pretty gold you know. It has her face on it.

Wait - last rites?