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Original poster

Things that stay with you.

471 replies

penfriends · 04/06/2016 23:42

What random things have struck a chord with you?

Mine is a Postsecret card that said:

"Everyone who knew me before 9/11 think I'm dead"

I read it years ago but I think about that person. Family, parents, siblings.

Just one sentence but it's stayed with me fore years.

OP posts:
elpaso · 04/10/2016 18:33

Nowhere as bad as many of the previous posters, but being told by my ex that the only reason he got with me was because he was confused and that if he had been thinking straight he never would have considered it. Really messed with my mindset.

MrsHaitch · 05/10/2016 22:46

IceRoadDucker it is cancer in his neck. There were fears it had spread to his lungs but we know now it's just the neck. He's having a mask made for radiotherapy now. Thanks Flowers

mysistersimone · 07/10/2016 18:52

Watching my mum die after a 5 year battle with cancer.

Being told by previous boyfriends, 'you're not textbook pretty, but you're alright' 'i didn't think much of you when I first saw you but with make up on you're passable'

I remember all the bullies names.

On a night out with a friend, friend was being chatted up and his friend came over and said to him 'you're not leaving me with the fat one'

Being asked by a midwife if I was pregnant. I wasn't. She kept asking me if I was sure.

Being asked if I was pregnant again. I wasn't. Question asker laughed at me.

YouCanShoveYourOtherGranny · 08/10/2016 05:38

The sheer joy in my dad's voice calling out my name when I walked in the door for my last visit with him. Even through that death's head mask the happiness shone from his eyes. That picture gave me strength for the next week's vigil, and wakes me often since.

Bloodybridget · 09/10/2016 09:21

In the 70s, on my way to work (holiday job) in Oxford Street, the song Young, Gifted and Black playing from inside a shop. A Black woman and her very small DD outside, the little girl was dancing to it. Her mum and I caught eyes - I felt like there was a thought between us.

MorrisZapp · 09/10/2016 09:31

A small ad I saw in the paper once.

'Hamster cage for sale, £10. Hamster included'

IAmChewie · 09/10/2016 10:16

Being told by my auntie after miscarriage at 12 weeks "maybe it was for the best"

Also being told that it didn't really count as I was only 12 weeks.

I always feel like I shouldn't hurt and that I'm imposing on people who have lost their babies at a later stage.

Callaird · 09/10/2016 10:47

Just reading this for the first time.

mylovesgoesdown My god that is heartbreaking. You are an amazing person to help these young people, so strong. I'm sobbing. For you and for the young man.

My uncle, who is also my godfather and I class him as my second dad, would do anything he could to make me happy, called me at least once a fortnight - called me 10 days after my boyfriend died suddenly and told me it was time to get over it! I know in my heart that he just hated to hear my cry and really didn't know what to say or help me with words (held me tight and stroked my hair in person) but man it hurt and although we are still close, he doesn't call me as often and I'll never truly forgive him.

I didn't hug or kiss my boyfriend goodbye the day that he died because he was sitting on the toilet and I couldn't wait until he had finished.

(I love my parents, they are/have been amazing parents, would and have done anything for me, however they have an aversion to using the phone! They never call me, as an effect of that, I too have an aversion to using the phone so rarely call them. I see them once every 6-8 weeks and unless we have a question we don't talk in between (my uncle relays info back and forth!) It upsets me way more than it should!)

GhettoFabulous · 14/10/2016 20:53

I'm going through a bit of a rough patch just now, and my beloved friend said this to me on Facebook:

"And I hope you know that you're an exceptionally special person. There is literally nobody on this planet like you. You're one of the strongest and most independent people I've ever met, it makes me happy to know that you are here in this world, subtly and purposefully improving it in a million little ways.

And you're funny and kind and warm and sexy and I think you kick ass."

Another one: a few months ago I was hopping in Aldi and I saw this tiny little old couple. Neither of them came up to my shoulder and they had to reach up to push the trolley. The lady couldn't find what she wanted on the shelf, and the gent reached over, picked it up, and said, "Here it is, my darling." There was so much love and kindness in his voice. I really hope someone loves me like that when I'm old.

Suzcat78 · 16/10/2016 16:29

Finding out my mum who had cancer had only 6 months to live....I was 12, she died age 47.

Brother became my legal guardian, fun times ensued until I became an adult and my brother said he wished I was dead. Not once but twice.

An amazing friend of mine is retired and we get on amazingly regardless of the age difference (I'm 38, she's almost in her 70's) says no matter things that I've happened in your past you're an amazing mother and you should be proud of the daughter you're raising, she's a great little girl. Thanks.

My heart goes out to each and every one of you. We are a lot stronger than we care to think or admit Flowers

Heatherjayne1972 · 21/10/2016 20:33

Overhearing a lad describe me as 'plain'
The exh who got me pregnant (planned) then said he 'couldn't have sex with a fat woman' - charming

Firsttimer82 · 24/10/2016 20:51

After a lot of worry about infertility and telling my mother I was pregnant "How did you manage that then?"

Also from DM

"I think you have self esteem problems because your friends are so much thinner and prettier than you....." - Love that one.

Dh - "I like a full bush" - I knew he was the one then....

SlipperyJack · 24/10/2016 23:49

My ex-boss telling me "yes you've had a tricky year, but you need to move on now".

In the space of 18 months I'd been dreadfully ill in late pregnancy, had a traumatic birth, my mother had been diagnosed with dementia, my lovely FIL (who I loved as a replacement dad, my own having died many years before) had died hideously from cancer, I'd had a miscarriage, got a severely herniated lumbar disc which disabled me so much I needed surgery, and DH had been diagnosed with a very rare cancer also necessitating surgery. All with zero help from any family. But yeah, I guess I needed to move on Hmm

SlipperyJack · 25/10/2016 08:11

snakewitch, in your post upthread you talk about being reluctant to compliment people on their hair or whatever - definitely do it! A nice thing that will stay with me is a compliment like that. My car had broken down, it was freezing, I was in the throes of early pregnancy sickness, and I was marching off to a cafe to await the recovery truck. An elderly lady walking behind me called out "I hope you don't mind me saying this, but you have beautiful elegant ankles." I walked a bit taller for WEEKS.

So now I compliment random strangers on hair, clothes etc. I don't mind if they think I'm weird.

Mumberjack · 26/10/2016 11:41

This thread is so emotional - Flowers and thank you for sharing.
My first daughter was stillborn. Of the horror and hopelessness we felt, and some needless cruelty from family members, I always remember:
Our friends leaving a big bag of food at our front door so we wouldn't have to face a supermarket trip
An acquaintance (a friend we'd got drunk with at festivals etc when we were carefree) sending a beautiful card with such kind words, ditto so many people we hadn't expected
Being able to offer real experiences and comfort to a friend who lost her son a year later, made me feel that my daughter's short life was making a long term impact on others

SaltyRock · 26/10/2016 12:22

My mum saying to me 'I wish anything had happened to you rather than this' when I came out as a lesbian.

Greenandcabbagelooking · 27/10/2016 19:26

Nice things

Upon telling my boss I wanted to go back to uni to get a promotion he said "Good, I think you'll be excellent"

My senior colleague "when am I getting you back in my work life? I miss you and the fantastic job you do". I burst into tears. I was having a crappy day, and it made me feel too much!

My friend "you've come a long way in the three years I'be known you"

Iamalltheyhavenow · 27/10/2016 23:41

I worked in an admin capacity in an old people's home, and couldn't help but get attached to some of the residents. One lovely lady I was very fond of ( a spinster who dedicated her life to the Salvation Army, and had no family) ended up in hospital with a broken hip. I went to see her every evening to make sure she was OK and pick up her washing etc. When she was discharged I came into work and was beaming at the sight of her eating her breakfast, back in her usual place. I greeted her and told her how happy I was to see her back home. She thanked me for coming to see her every day and then said 'It's a pleasure to know you'. I went to my office and cried, I had done so little really. She sadly died a few days later, but her words enter my head whenever I doubt myself. I hope you are smiling up there in Heaven Edith xx

chickenowner · 04/11/2016 15:54

Nice things...

A friend of mine said to another friend - 'Chickenowner is always happy and smiling'.

A tutor at university, to our tutor group - 'That's why I like Chickenowner, she always laughs at my jokes' (I don't know why, but thinking of this always makes me smile!)

A stranger in a pub in central London, about 15 years ago - 'This balloon is for the prettiest girl in the pub, so I'm giving it to you'. He and his friends left the pub, so it wasn't a chat up line, which makes it nicer I think.

Smile
EchidnaWombat · 12/11/2016 21:39

The last phone call I had with my uncle when he had terminal cancer. I'd just recovered from being seriously ill. He asked me "How did you feel when you thought you were going to die?" Broke my heart.

pineappleeyes · 12/11/2016 21:45

A relative said to me "you're nowt without your hair"

I also remember my ex telling me he couldn't promise he wouldn't cheat on me again. I was broken.

kiwipie · 17/11/2016 02:45

A teacher in sixth form screaming at me for missing drama rehearsal and telling me 'I walked around school like I owned the place'

She was awful and from day one never liked me,

After telling my dad I forgave him for cheating on my mum, he replied that he had nothing to be sorry to me for, it was between him and my Mum.

JunosRevenge · 23/11/2016 01:32

My mother died very suddenly.

Friend's Mum: 'So what was the cause of death?'

Me: 'it was a heart attack'

Friend's Mum: 'Ooh, I am glad it was nothing serious'

Me:

Friend's Mum: 'What?'

My dear mum would have laughed her head off!

Amandahugandkisses · 23/11/2016 01:40

The text message;

I don't want you anymore.

breatheinskipthegym · 23/11/2016 02:16

An ex-boyfriend telling me I'm the perfect height. Tall enough to look elegant, small enough to want to protect.

10 years-ish later, telling me I'm the one who got away. Not sure I buy it, but it's popped into my head every day since.

A teenage girl in Starbucks. I'd seen her previously in the shopping centre lashing out at her parents over something small, and her parents dealing with her with such calmness and grace. She made me wonder how my adored little girl (4yo, non-verbal with autism) might be at that age. The teen chatted to me in the Starbucks queue and told me I had a lovely voice. It's the most unusual and sweetest comment I've ever had. It's probably been 2 years since and I still think of it frequently.

My not-very-D H, when I found out he'd been visiting 'escorts' behind my back: "fuck you bitch, you deserved it". About 18 months and I'm still waiting for my fury and disgust to subside.