My colleague has thrown my lunch in the bin

[DidYouBINmysushiyouTWAT]

What is the correct etiquette please?

You need not quote directly from Debretts.

If I weren't in the queue for the soggy salmonella sarnies left in Tescos- I'd write a longer OP.

Part Two here: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/_chat/a2631196-My-colleague-has-twat-me-over-the-head-with-a-courgette - edited by MNHQ

RedToothBrush
But why??

I had a good feeling about this thread. Pleased to see it's delivering :o

Channel your inner Father Ted!

Wait until you're both alone together in the break room. Look her dead in the eye, take the most expensive thing she's bought in the fridge, take the wrapper off, lick it, and put it back in the fridge. Maintain eye contact the whole time. Then carry on like nothing happened. When she inevitably goes apes hit just stay really calm and deny all knowledge. Insinuate to her and HR you're really concerned for her apparent memory issues.

This thread is bringing me so much joy. I'm such a petty bitch 😂.

Love Tate's suggestion!

Arfarfanarf - exactly what I would do. Bloody cheeky cow!

Note is no longer there!

Lunch is there- I dared put it in- shopping has been done for her family meal/s- they get through a lot of yoghurt! (joke)

IT bitch has texted me (sushi)it's there put has been moved on it's side. The courgette cock probably got frisky.

FMFF- hasn't moved or done much today- the clients are loving her (either someone is stirring the pot or FMFF has moved my sushi via telekinesis and put in on it's side) cheeky.

IT bitch thinks I should write a note. I must WORK!

You need to put this note on the fridge next time she leaves a note.

Does she do food shopping every day???

wowzers....not sure I would have binned her food.....I mean it could actually have been a 3rd party shit stirrer that binned the ops.

We temporarily lost our microwave when someone microwaved a whole fish and it caught fire

Sad naked fridge!

Why should using comic sans be made a criminal act?
Because its utterly HORRENDOUS and ugly and criminally overused.
There are so many fonts you can use as an alternative (including dyslexic friendly ones). There is even a website dedicated to the cause called www.comicsanscriminal.com which explains it far better than me.

IT bitch is right. Note is important for your work, as your moral has be severely effected by the stress that fridge wars is having on you. Management better sort it out, because it is disrupting your ability to work. Yesterday your work could have been compromised by having low blood sugar levels due to the theft of your lunch.

You should type up a note and laminate it. In Gothic script or something. It should say:

Please let us in. It's so hot and lonely out here.

Signed, everyone else's lunch

And paste a picture of a mournful-looking sandwich on the bottom.

Be really, really falsely sympathetic and say you had the same issue yesterday when your lunch was thrown in the bin.

Tell her you will also report it to management because there's clearly a thief in the office.

--Then throw something else of hers away.

^ This!

Actually, you know that website sends emails to people's addresses educating them on the evils of comic sans.... I think you can do it anonymously too.

This thread is excellent

It's made me realise I have been incredibly lucky with colleagues because I've never worked in a place with fridge wars. In one of my favourite workplaces, we used to have a weekly communal lunch. A group of us would commit to bring in one item eg soup; bread; cheese; salad; dressing; and then we'd all share. I'm even more grateful for those lovely people after reading about all the horrors people on this thead have experienced.

was that a subtle placemark?!

Like this

Today 12:11 Tate15

^New note as if written by her.

Dear colleagues,

I don't give a fuck about your packed lunches, or your having milk in your tea or coffee!

I have put my daily/weekly groceries in the fridge and it's tough titty if there is no room for anything of yours!

I will be binning any packed lunches that get in the way of my pork chops or Dairy Lea triangles!

Don't you know who I am?

Carol/Nicola or whatever her name is^

This ^ this would be a absolutely perfect!

This is amazing. This isn't a shameless placemark at all, oh no not I

Nobody throws anything away from our kitchen. I accidentally left a pack of butter in the cupboard when I went on maternity leave and it was still there when I came back seven months later

Ah, I work from home at the moment. This thread is amazing.

Yes, EVERY office has the half-a-mug-of-milk-cheapskate-latte drinkers, and they are usually also the porridgey feckers too. Infuriating.

I LOVE that the note has gone. What will happen next?

I'm also fascinated that she shops EVERY DAY and buys enough to fill a fridge up. How large is her family? And why are they eating gammon AND cod tonight?

This thread is classic. Wish we had sushi-gate or malteser-gate issues at our work. Ours is all boring and we get along fine. No fridge issues. BORING?

Her note!

Why is it written
Like a poem?

Also it's titled: Notice. In Comic Sans, a font that it is actually impossible to take seriously.

Surely this cries out for a poetic response. I would title it 'Poetic Justice'. Will have to go away and think of something suitably Adrian Mole-ish.

This is surely the moment for a bit of William Carlos Williams?
www.poets.org/poetsorg/poem/just-say

This is Just to Say

I have thrown out
the gammon
that was in
the fridge

and which
you were probably
intending
for supper

Forgive me
It was huge
No room
for sushi

Hang on, if the fridge is empty, where has all her shopping gone?

I don't understand why she can't use her lunch hour to do her shopping. Meaning when she comes back the fridge is empty as everyone has had lunch and then she can feel free to use it to her hearts content.

Instead of using company time to do it in the morning and pissing everyone off in the process.

I'd be sorely tempted to buy fresh cream cakes for everyone in the office tomorrow. Except her. Because the fridge is too full to store hers. So she can have pork chops or something instead.