Stupid Facebook selling.

[VivaLeBeaver]

Real post I've seen this week.

"Got some cheap stuff for sale if you want anything"

Cue 20 posts along the lines of;

"Have you got a patio heater hun?"

"No sorry"

Have you got a wheelbarrow?

No, haven't got a wheelbarrow.
Xx

3 days later the thread is still going strong. 20 people have been disappointed that the seller doesn't have what they want and the seller has made no effort to make any suggestion what she does have.

The best one I saw the other day was

Boys 5-6 clothes wanted free. Must be able to deliver.

Felt like posting cheeky cow but I am far too polite!

Oh and somebody wants some white draws.

I've got some unworn Sloggis he could have.

Slightly shitty but apart from that perfect?

Oh our local town page is like that too curly. Someone posted cctv footage of a dog taking a shit on his drive last week! with the vow to catch the critter and it's owner and bring them to justice

You must post a pic of some pants offering them Viva

oooh itiswhatitiswhatitis that sounds very familiar, any chance we share the same local page?

Google image hates white draws, men's white pants - white trousers.

Tempted to google dirty men's pants but

and they are obsessed with runiting cats with owners

"cat walking up our driveway, looks lost, anyone missing a black and white cat?"
followed by lots of people tagging in every resident with a black cat asking if it's theirs.

How does a cat look lost FFS? Invariably said cat belongs two doors down and has full permition to wander neighbourhood.

I advertised a bed free for collection. Bloke said he wanted it and would message me. Oh he did message me alright. He offered to pay me £100 if Id shag him on the bed and a further £100 if I called him afterwards for dirty talk. He said I could keep the bed as well .

Fucker.

One of my local ones has someone on selling fake Nike trainers. I reported them to Nike (super grass) but nothing seems to have been done as they are still selling them.

I am loving these! I haven't looked at a selling site but the mother of a fb friend was always selling tat. Everything she posted would come up on my wall usually -

Boys rattle 99p

Which she'd then bump 15 times a day. They were God fearing Christians so obviously blocked me in the end.

possibly westmorlandsausage if your towns page has more bun fights than AIBU!

. Ranicorn

I used to run a selling page......the most thankless task I ever took on!!!

itis on our local selling pages some people have set themselves up as saviours of 'missing' cats.

Basically, any poor moggy wondering the streets gets taking in, fed, picture put up of 'found cat - looks really skinny' before being taken to the RSPCA.

Where the disgruntled owner has to go pick it up.

Also, clothes BNWT, wanting £18.

Price tag clearly shows they were bought for £18. So why wouldn't I just go to the shop, and buy a brand new pair for the exact same price?

Same with gift vouchers - wanting the exact same value as the amount on the voucher...

Christmas Day night and Boxing Day is always a bit depressing - the number of 'unwanted gifts' that go up...best one I saw was when the giver of such a gift was also on the selling page, the resulting bunfight was glorious!

Ours this week. Loads of size 16 and 18 ladies clothes. Not needed as ive lost weight and I'm not fat anymore.

Cheeky bugger-need new phone plz. Just 4 text and pics.
Reply-I've got this if you want it. (Oldish phone)
Ooo no I want something better than that
Then mum of cheeky bugger chips in-u can't have one. The police have told u u not allowed.

On my sister's FB she seems to be friends with people who sell entire sets of accessories for their sitting rooms when they fancy a change.

So...

"Teal rug, teal lamp, teal vase and teal placemats...20 quid. Or will swap for hot pink stuff...fancy a change!"

The same sets of Argos bits and bobs do the rounds multiple times!

A wandering dog on the estate. Now that brings out all new levels of excitement and community spirit to find it's owner and everyone rejoices in what a close knit community we are. Until said dog shits on someone's driveway

I tried selling something on my towns 'bargains' page. I put the ad on, then realised the next day i had made an error on one of the measurements so commented to correct it. The fucking admins deleted the post instantly, saying I had "bumped" it and it's only allowed to be bumped by other people commenting on it. Fuckers! I didn't know it was my first (and last) experience of a fb selling page. I told them to shove their ridiculous rules up their arses and went on EBay instead.

These are hilarious... almost worth joining fb for!

Though I think the spelling/grammar would finish me off.

Dildo on ours. New and boxed tho
And is posted 3-4 times a day and is bright purple

I am a member of all my local selling sites purely for entertainment value. This was posted earlier today on one of them. I don't even know what it is. All the photos are upside down and there are no details in the comments!

Ours is a cracker.

We bought a job lot of camera parts for a price...lots of people were interested in bits but seller wanted to sell all. So we bought. Now other parties want to pay nothing for the bits we don't want/can't use. If you did not want to pay the asking price, you are not getting select bits for free...bugger off.

And 'gorgeous 6 month old genuine oak table with six chairs perfect condition - 75 bucks'...will you take an offer?
Next post ' shabby chic formica table that you see at rubbish tip with 3 mismatched and torn chairs - 150 bucks'...and people are fighting over it.
Anything labelled shabby (Shit) is snapped up.

Some of the worst pages are the free to good home groups. I was giving away lots of things when I was moving house, some of the private messages were ridiculous "give me ur stuff" no fuck off. Most of them never turned up or wanted it all dismantled, delivered and put back together again. For free.

The funniest ads I've seen are on horse and equestrian Facebook groups.

"Looking for an Arab/tb type, must be suitable for novice, must be 100% in every way, must be aged between 6-10, must be potential horse of the year show winner, must be delivered and come with full rack and rugs. Budget of no more than £500".