Any positives about a YES vote, for the English? (light hearted)

[onelastfling]

The Weather on TV will be a LOT shorter.

We will only have to wait 5 minutes for the weather girl to get round to us, instead of the usual 15 minutes, while they go all round the houses Scotland etc.

They're going to be shite for trafficking really then aren't they.

I once heard tell of a brave wee haggis called Hamish.
He was funded by the NHS to have his legs levelled out to aid his escape across the border but the Daily Mail got a hold of the story.

Last I heard Hamish and his family were eaten at Burns night in a horrible massacre of a very noble line of Haggi

Maybe we could just use a Submarine?

No more obesity epidemic (well it is the land of the deep fried mars bar)

Errol that's exactly what my now xh grandad told me the first time I went to Edinburgh, I knew it was true

Life expectancy will go up!

We'd have a national tartan shortage.

What will all the hen night parties wear now they won't have tartan mini skirts at their disposal?

I just realised I've never had a deep fried mars bar. Now I never will :(

The recipe will be lost for ever.

One just how hard do you s'pose that recipe is?

1. Batter mars bar
2. Deep fry
3. call ambulance as arteries have seized up

No more having to suffer looking at bonnie Prince Charlie wearing a kilt, flaunting his knobbly knees.

I wonder if the Queen will demand the Royal Yacht Britannia back.

There'll be scenes of panic at the Edinburgh Woollen Mills as desperate pensioners try to grab the last lambswool cardigans prior to separation.

The sports reports would change, and we'd no longer have:

Partick Thistle 2: Hamilton Haggis Athletic 1
Whisky Wanderers 1: St Mirren 0

Edinburgh Wollen Mills - Where fashion goes to Die.

Good news for Wales. They will have the highest mountain.

Legion :)

Yes, I hadn't thought of that. Will the BBC stop reporting the Scottish football scores?

What about Berwick Rangers who are actually in England but play in the Scottish leagues? Has anyone thought about them in all of this?

Legion

The Welsh will partay on that news.

Speed bonny boat like a scot on the run
Onward! Salmond cries
Carry the mess thats coming from this
Over the winds to Skye

Loud the Scots howl, Loud Cameron Roars
Haggis' rend the air
Baffled the voters are by the shore
Vote, they had better dare

{Chorus}

Though the yay's leap, though the no's weep
Holyrood's up for grabs
Rocked to the deep, Salmond will keep
Scaring your kids to sleep

{chorus}

Many's an MP who panicked and say
STAY IN THE UNION NOW STAY!
When the night came, the votes counted up
Haggi all flee their homes

{Chorus}

May as well leave the last verse as the original here...

Burned are their homes, exile and death
Scatter the loyal men;
Yet ere the sword cool in the sheath
Salmond will come again.

Never more will we hear the scoreline

Forfar 5
Fife 4

And the Three Peaks challenge will unambiguously mean the three yorkshire peaks with no cheating by travelling between by car. If people want to do Snowdon and Scafell, they'll have to add whatever the highest point of NI is and include a ferry trip.

Maybe the next move will be to retake Berwick?

(And we could retake Calais, perhaps that's what the EU is really worried about if there's a move to re-establish old borders?)

Would Jedward inhabit Jedburgh and have it as a little NI Outpost? Sort of like the Scottish/Irish Embassy to the borders?

Frankel

Brilliant again Ididnt