Tell me about the most jaw dropping OMG moment you've ever witnessed...

[AlpacaPicnic]

Because everyone's got a story! And here is mine...

I was on a bus recently, quite a full bus. A wheelchair in the wheelchair space, one lady with a pram (unfoldable I think) in the buggy space. Bus pulled up at a bus stop, where two ladies are waiting with pushchairs, chatting to each other.

One lady gets on, parks her pushchair into the remaining buggy space. The second lady tries to get on, but the bus driver won't let her as the buggy space is now full. She asks the lady with the pram to get off the bus so she can travel with her friend. 'Pram lady' looks at her askance, and says sorry, but she needs to get home. Both pushchair ladies then proceed to loudly and verbally abuse the pram lady for being selfish and not getting off the bus, so they can travel together.

Everyone else on the bus was stunned into silence, the bus driver throws both pushchair ladies off the bus and drives off. Pushchair ladies stand at bus stop yelling and shaking fists at the receding bus!

I've never known so many bus passengers strike up conversation all at once, making sure the 'pram lady' was ok, and generally saying 'what a pair!'

Ooh, pancake awwwwkward!

Similar thing happened to my dhs friend 'big bert' not his real name

While in sixth form college, went out on the town, met a lady, took her home, saw her nekkid...

Back at college on Monday, and the announcement comes that there is a new teacher for his subject... Lo and behold - it's the lady he shagged at the weekend! His classmates high fived him apparently.

A full pub, student night, freshers and locals all mingling well, in comes a police woman. She was quite petite, but looked serious, and had a real presence about her, so was taken seriously for a few minutes, but then it became clear she was a stripper gram. She did her act in front of the poor/lucky lad, lots of laughter from crowd. She then stands on a table , removes her knickers, pours a drink on the table, sits on the liquid, opens her legs and spins really fast around and around.

Whilst that is going on to much uproar, two real police officers are outside looking in through large picture window, they are about to come in when a fight erupts outside, as they are trying to deal with that two stunning long -legged women squat on the steps of shop opposite and have a very long wee....stripper in pub not amused by the competition! Another quiet night in a sleepy cathedral city

When I was a teenager we had a young man come to the door and ask my mother if sge wouod allow him to just go and sit in our field and look at the view as he was trying to write some poetry. About half an hour later she sent me to go see if he wanted a cup of tea...he was lying on his back naked having a wank!

When I was a student and had just that day moved into East Ham I saw two big blokes frogmarching a young skinny lad down the road, his hands were tied and one was holding a knife to his neck. Itwas pre-mobile phones and we didn't even have a landline, they marched him to a phone box and made him speak to someone then half dragged him back the way they came. I ran to the phone box and called the police and they weren't even interested! I couldn't believe it and wondered what the hell I had moved there for.

I was camping at the beach in Kenya (Mombasa) back in the early 80's with a group of other teenagers. We were all sitting around the camp fire smoking spliff a and drinking when one of the boys though it'd be a good idea to throw some petrol onto the fire. The flames ran back up the splash and set fire to the boy, who then ran yelling into the sea. He came out of the waves trying to laugh it off but skin was hanging from his arms. We all sat there looking stunned and stupid, not saying or doing anything to help him, until the one sensible person in the group (not me) suggested he probably needed to see a doctor. Poor kid ended up having skin grafts...

Sorry another poo one. A very glamorous posh girl I knew at college shared the house with a few of our male mates and one day couldn't get into either loo because they were being used. She said she was absolutely desperate so she got two plastic bags, one inside the other, folded to make a kind of potty shape, sat in the airing cupboard, and took a dump. Then she had a plastic bag full of poo on her hands and didn't know what to do with it. She went outside to find a bin but the neighbours were out and she didn't want to get caught putting a big bag of poo in the bin. She said she was kind of panicking and just desperate to get rid of it so she walked into the library a few doors down, left it on a shelf and walked away very fast!

Alpaca Similar story ... colleague was a young single teacher, met an older single man. They had a brief liaison (Surrey one night stand).
Only he wasn't so single... at parents evening it turned out he was married to a school governor who mentioned her husband 'travelled' on business so didn't often make such evenings!

One sunny saturday afternoon I just happened to glance out of my living room window to see a young lady striding quickly past with a young child in a buggy, she was followed at a few paces behind by a completely naked young man, his todger was waving about as if to get as much of the sun rays as possible.

Oh I have one more!

About two weeks ago I was up early with dd, it was about 6.30am.

I heard a bit of a commotion outside and looked out to see a man walking around a car screaming at the man inside to get out and fight him. He was screaming and screaming and kicking the car repeatedly. The other guy didn't get out so the angry man got into his own car anddrdrove it straight at the other man's car. He smashed into the back of it, then reversed back and got back out to resume screaming at the bloke.

A couple of minutes later he got back in his car and drove off. As he was leaving I saw that he had a womanand children in the car. The police turned up a few minutes after they left.

I have since been told by a friend of his that the guy in the car owed angry man £200. It was rather a shocking start to the day!

One morning I was woken up at about 5am to a commotion outside. I looked out my window to see several policemen, a huge police dog and a man in handcuffs in my back garden. I got up and let them all through the house but never got an explanation as to how they ended up in my back garden.

After DS1 was born I was put on a 4 bed ward. It was pretty small, with not much room between the beds. The woman on the bed opposite was wearing nothing but a t shirt. No pants or anything. Lay there quite happily, everything on show, all through visiting time. My poor FIL didn't know where to look!

I had the misfortune to pass the Naked Rambler on the way home from school (and my yellow car can be seen passing him in the documentary) Luckily for him we were not on our bikes that day as DS would of given him the third degree.

I used to live in a second floor flat with a brilliant view of a runway, and the first time I saw a plane land then take off straight away I was very shocked and worried for the passengers, until DH came home and told me they were practising and it happens all the time. He had witnessed quite few plane crashes including some of collegues so want fazed by this at all

Just remembered one, a few years ago on a Saturday afternoon there was a knock at the door DH looked out the window and said " it's naked man" as calmly as if it was the postman. DH opened the door just as a police car drew up outside, and the policeman asked if we knew the guy, then when we said we didn't just said " it's ok, he has diabetes" then led him to the car and drove off. Never did find out what that was all about.

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One day a few years ago I was at Crown Court, quietly taking notes in a fairly dull case for our barrister, when the defendant leapt out of the box and tried to leg it out of the court room. Unluckily for him I'm about 5'9 and the court seats are really uncomfortable for the long-legged so as I was in the end seat, I was sitting with my legs out to the side and he fell over my feet which were sticking out into the aisle and was stopped (and arrested).

The sentence he subsequently got for attempting to abscond was more severe than the one he received for the original offence, the daft nugget.

When I was little (about 9ish) my mum took me and my brother (7 at the time) to London to go to the BM. Afterwards, as it was a beautiful day, we went to a nearby park to have an icecream. We sat down on some benches that formed a ring around a lovely big fountain.

Along comes expensive-city-suit man. He sits on one of the benches as well, and is apparently agitated by the presence of pigeons and sparrows. He chases them a little, then obviously gets bored and returns to his bench. It's a warm day, so he takes his jacket off, folds it neatly and deposits it safely on the bench next to him so it stays clean.

He then takes a running jump, shoes and all, into the fountain, and takes a shower - fully clothed, in a public park, in the middle of the afternoon. By this point the icecreams my brother and I were clutching had been completely forgotten.

After he's satisfactorily clean, he squelches back over to his bench, dons his jacket, and departs with a nod to us and a well-mannered "Good Afternoon".

9-yeay-old me was completely astounded. I've never seen anything like it since, and when I was at uni I went to those Carnage events

I've posted this before but still makes me laugh/marvel/wonder

A few years ago I saw a group of very well turned out ladies sitting having a picnic on a rug. They were wearing hats and gloves and eating very expensive looking food out of hampers as well as drinking champagne out of proper champagne flutes.

Nowt that unusual about it.....except this was on the floor of the public loos at Victoria Station.

Late one night in York as a student my DH and I saw a couple having sex in a churchyard. Actually on a grave ??

OH and myself were in a restaurant, seated at banquette type seats that run the length of the wall. Man alongside us proceeded to change his babe's nappy by lying him/her on the banquette. We were half way through our starters at the time!
Couldn't believe it. Complained to the waiter who was just as un impressed!

FyreFly I am probably being very thick but what is the BM in London???

British Museum probably - though given the nature of this thread you could be forgiven for thinking Bowel Movement.

People in hypo(hyper?) glycemic comas sometimes do extraordinary stuff whilst unconscious, hence "it's alright, he has diabetes". There's a whole set of criminal case law on whether or not a person with diabetes can be found guilty of crimes committed in that state - it gets more complicated than I can face typing.

Yep Lottie the British Museum :)

The acronyms are becoming more prolific, aren't they, Lottie?

I did get 'BM', but I am a Londoner!

Last one was in Reading Town Centre a scabby lady in motorised wheelchair verbally abusing an old lady collecting money for animal abuse (ranting about caring for people first) to the point she was crying before scooting off. DW gave old lady a hug and a tissue.

Cycling along a very frosty canal path at 10am one cold winter morning with DF and her DD, passed an old wino standing there, bold as brass, as he was fellated by an equally unfragrant woman on her knees.