What on earth is inside my pear?

[HairyPotter]

Bleugh!

I was eating in the the dark and didn't notice until it was too late.

I hate MN.

This thread is hilarious. Never again will I eat a pear. Never, again.

I am daan saaaaath so the pear beasties won't catch me (hopefully behind the crumble line)

You do realize that the mutant pears can make the crumble soggy and sneak through!

Oooh! It's probably attached itself to your DH like one of those brain slugs off Futurama. Check the back of his head and behind his hairs, just in case.

Hairy please ask your dh to retrieve the mutant pear/zombie/baby pear mouse and burn it. I'm local to you (the McDonalds tale gave it away), and I'm not keen on this spreading, I need my pear fix

I will give you 100 pounds if you eat a bit. Do you have paypal?

That line made me LAUGH!

just

It's gone?

Get out of the house...set it on fire first though just to be on the safe side!

Has your DH no spirit of adventure, no insatiably curious mind? What did he think of it?

It looks less alien cutted up tbf.

Oh thank The Lord x-posts.

Pears - they used to be so sweet and innocent...

Hmm, now scared about every food group. Is it possible to survive on cola and vitamins?

Hang on Hairy what's that behind you?

Y'know, dh said he didn't notice anything odd about it just scooped and binned.

He's one of them isn't he? Now there is two in the house.

Ooh Stripy where are you from? Give me a clue and I can drop it off at yours later

OP, has no one suggested a name change to PearyHotter for you?

Actually I quite like the sound of HairyPearyPotter.

Hairy peary potter,
She once bit into a rotter,
She's out of luck,
The alien grew up,
And now the gross fecker's got 'er.

I think your DH has been sucked into the pear vortex, his brain will have been assimilated by now. Good luck Hairy.

I will never eat another pear now, and all my favorite puds were pears, poached in wine, pear & almond tart, pear Belle Helene. I am going to have to eat Angel Delight for pud for the rest of my life.

Frankly I think I'd be relieved to hear it was just a creatures nest. I'm pretty sure it's something much worse [wibble]

I once found a caterpillar in my McDonald's burger. It was the days before camera phones. I was far too understanding and just said I was glad to see it was real lettuce grown in a field. I should've told the DM and made my fortune

I am crying real tears of fear of laughter here. I'm sorry HairyPotter but this is pure gold mould

Hairy I need to go to bed now. (I am north of zzzzz's crumble defence line so I will be blocking all airvents and checking under the bed first.) Before I go I just need to know you're still alive ok. You feeling well? No strange feelings? How about the family, everyone seem normal?

I always knew there was a reason I didn't like pears - mutant aliens growing inside them is why!

I once cut open a pepper and it was full of dead flies. I've eaten a plum and then noticed a maggot in it. And had homegrown cauliflower where a poor caterpillar got boiled and served up with dinner.

But never have I seen such a thing like that of the strange case of the pear alien thing.

Hubby has just reminded me of when we went to our local café and ordered burgers. All was lovely, and our son squeezed a big dollop of ketchup from the plastic tomato on the table. He sat for a few minutes, dipping chips and munching, then stopped mid-munch and said, "Mummy, why is my ketchup wriggling?"

MAGGOTS.

I've never been able to eat in our local café since.

Hairy, PLEASE send the photos to Kew Gardens so they can identify it for you! Even if they come back with another "WTAF is THAT??" it would be fun to know. :)

Hell mend you for eating pears!

No so much problems on Boot Camp!