WWYD? I am NOT a stalker. I am just waiting for my train!

[OooohHorlicks]

So for three days a week I take a train to work. I stand on the platform and wait for the train and don’t really register anything or anyone. I vaguely stand behind a couple that also wait for the train because they stand in the place where the door stops, and it is just in my nature to form a queue.

Anyway this week I was gazing into space and noticed that the woman in front of me kept gesturing towards me. So I tuned in. “I just hate it”, she says to the man. “She always stands behind us.” "Arse, she’s got a point", I think. And I can see how it must be totally disconcerting, but I never really saw it as standing behind them, just as standing where the doors stop, and they usually get to the platform first.

So the following day I resolved to stand to the side of them rather than behind and I noticed out of the corner of my eye that she had marched further down the platform with the man. Fair enough, I think. Problem solved – you don’t like it, then move. Wait for the train. I turn my head to see it as it pulls in and she is looking at me laughing, and then giving the man a triumphant laugh.

Now I am slightly torn. On the one hand I am thinking she needs to get a life / grip / perspective, is obviously very petty, and for three or four minutes in a morning I am quite happy to ignore the ridiculous behaviour and stand where I please. On the other hand I can actually see why it would be disconcerting to have a random standing behind you every day and I feel slightly aggrieved at being held out to be a stalker when I am barely able to function and just unthinkingly doing what I always do.

So what do I do? It’s a small station and a short train, only 4 carriages. I could wait further along to get on one of the other carriages but they are either ones with a toilet on (grim) or high risk in terms of getting / not getting a seat. But I can’t really be doing with this every morning. I just want a quiet life. Hopefully they will just continue to wait further down the platform but if they get there before me I suspect they will make a point of waiting in their usual space.

So what would you do? Apart from tell me to worry about something worth worrying about?

Brilliant, just remembered it's Wednesday tomorrow. Are you going to arrive early again? What's your plan of action .

Woohoo can't wait for next installment!

Oh, I hope the OP doesn't live in an area where the trains are cancelled.

I think Grandmother's Footsteps with the added modification of a Weeping Angels finish should see her off quite nicely

especially if you could have some pointy teeth installed and a nice layer of greyish foundation for the final arms outstretched/terrible grimace looming momnet.

Evening my slightly scary but very funny support network! You've made the thread a classic!

Train service looks fine for tomorrow so far. I intend to arrive early again and feign a complete lack of awareness of anything that may or may not be going on around me. I wonder if she is limbering up by doing some preparatory hair flicking this evening ...

Will update from the platform.

It was me that asked for it to be moved.

don't forget to stand exactly where you need to for the doors, and brook no more queue-jumping on her part. although, have to say, round these parts if the driver over- or under-shoots and everybody has to shuffle a couple of feet we still respect the virtual queue.

I wonder is Mystery Mumsnetter stalker will make an appearance...

And so I am here. They are not. BUT I am standing close to the front of the platform and a man has just marched to a halt in front of me! I am and

They are now here. Next to me. A woman is standing perhaps 10cm behind them. I want to high five her. How do I find out if she is a MNetter?

We should definitely have our own signal, like the masons!!!

Am liking the live update

Maybe the man is a husband of a mumsnetter (one even a mumsnetter himself!) or maybe there is a weird nutter site that she has been posting on and in the same way we've all offered to come stand behind her, maybe he offered to come stand in front of you.

I'm over thinking this aren't I?!

Time for a secret signal. Can you both scratch your nose with your left hand.

do the finger/eye thing....you know, where you point to your eyes with your first two fingers, and then point to the possible MNter's eyes and then back at yours....but do a small wink and thumbs up too,

otherwise you just look bonkers.

What time's your train?

Has she flicked her hair yet??

Pimpf you may be but I had all the same thoughts!

Am on train now. Missed my chance, sorry guys. Had limited exposure to hair flicker as the man-formerly-in-front then moved between us. It is suddenly quite busy at our door!

Just found this thread and my kids think I'm nuts laughing out loud. You need to carry a red packet of Pom bear crisps.

yes, either actively be eating pom bears, or make a corsage out of an empty packet an pin it to your lapel.

MN codetalk can be: 'the Brian does yoni at midnight', the answer to which must be 'but the gluezilla IBU'.

The random man and woman have to be MNers!

Quick, think of a signal for next week to check...

Perhaps a quick flash?! Something subtle.

Thanks for the update. The reason this is the best thread EVER is that the update are clearly true! So many funny threads are ruined when the 'hilarious' updates become more and more outrageous and more and more unbelievable.

I will be back next week.

Love it, but I think yabvvvvvvu making us wait til next week for an update!

shameless place mark

great update Horlicks. Roll on next week!

It won't be next week though? Horlicks commutes 3 days a week; it should be tomorrow!
Having found the thread today I don't think I can wait a whole week

Do we know which station inSurrey? I am tempted to go along with my pom bears tomorow.