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Original poster

Strangest complaint you've ever received

320 replies

bdbfan · 26/10/2013 12:54

Following on from the thread about ridiculous tourist complaints, what's the strangest complaint you've ever received?

I'll start, I run a small cafe, a lady ordered a toasted sandwich then asked for a refund because it was toasted. She said she didn't realise it would be heated in a new fangled thing and wanted something from the 90's.

I still have absolutely no clue about what she was after.

OP posts:
DisgraceToTheYChromosome · 26/10/2013 20:59

AnyCoffeeFucker: the groceries weren't fresh and were delivered at high speed.

hellsbells76: Sounds about right. I was told, in all seriousness, that more deliveries should be made by pushbike. Considering a standard trailer load runs at 12 tonnes...

killpeppa · 26/10/2013 20:59

another cinema one, I loved working there:)

my boss was 73 & always asked for a nice hot cup of tea to be brought up to his office. no matter who made it it was always cold. we tried everything including microwaving it!

one day I made it not giving a shot cause he'd complain as usual, I brought it up & he took a sip, followed by a big drink of water then said...

'what the fuck are you trying to do? burn my mouth off?'

lucky I loved him to pieces the cheeky wee git Grin

AnyCoffeeFucker · 26/10/2013 21:00

Ah. I see Grin

Dawnywoo · 26/10/2013 21:06

Another café related incident - person who shall remain nameless asked how much for a jacket potato - I explained £3.25 with chilli and cheese, £2.95 with tuna or cheese. She said she just wanted a jacket potato. I said £1.50? She stormed out screaming at the top of her voice that I was a total rip off merchant...

It still fuck's me off to this day. If £1.50 was extortionate then clearly £1 wouldn't have been good enough either so therefore 50p was actually what she was after (btw the cartons cost 25p)

Mehrida · 26/10/2013 21:07

I recently ran a corporate induction at work.

One of the happy sheets came back at the end with the comment 'it was a bit too corporate.'

I took it as a compliment.

Same guy complained about his seat being too far from the screen. Even though he'd moved it there himself against our advice as he wanted to be next to the door.

Regularly get complaints about the type of tea/biscuits we serve as refreshments.

Last week someone marked down the venue because she got stuck behind a road accident and it took her ages to get there.

EthethethethChrisWaddle · 26/10/2013 21:09

Like a previous poster we often got post for another person (we lived in Close, they lived in Road, but they were next to each other) I always put their post through their door. They'd put my post back in the post box, with a note telling the postie to try my address etc. But they had to walk past our place to get to the postbox! Mad!

When we were selling our old place the estate agent gave us some feedback from someone who'd looked round.

It was too big. We were selling a one bedroom flat! How the hell can it be too big!

SHRIIIEEEKFuckingBearBlood · 26/10/2013 21:11

Buyer speak for "we can't afford it but wanted a nosey"

EthethethethChrisWaddle · 26/10/2013 21:15

Just remembered this one!

I was in a cafe with my friend, it sold savoury croissants or rolls. A woman came in and asked for a baguette. She was told they didn't sell baguettes, and, oh my god, she ranted and raved that she wanted a baguette and why wouldn't he make her a baguette etc, while the man told her they didn't have any so how could he make her one. She finally stormed off still ranting away.

EthethethethChrisWaddle · 26/10/2013 21:18

SHRIIIEEEK It was a businessman relocating and he could have whatever he wanted as the company was paying! Obviously he wanted a teeny hidey hole, not our obviously palatial flat!

ThedementedPenguin · 26/10/2013 21:29

I worked in a call centre for quite a well known company but in the financial sector. We would of received a lot of calls for other departments in the business and a lot if people would get very angry we couldn't explain his problem.

One Sunday a very drunk man phoned up looking to complain about the postal service he received. No matter what I said he refused to believe I couldn't help. Ended the call and he rung back continually until he had managed to speak to everyone on my team and the manager to complain how useless I was. Was a very entertaining day.

bubblebabeuk · 26/10/2013 21:30

Love this thread

nothruroad · 26/10/2013 21:34

Once a Year 8 pupil went to the deputy headteacher to complain that he had to work for the whole period in my class and that there was never time to sit and chat! I took it as a compliment.

tinmug · 26/10/2013 21:36

A customer got shitfaced and fell off her chair in the restaurant and then emailed to say that our chairs were unsafe. Absolute prick.

mineofuselessinformation · 26/10/2013 21:39

I had parents who complained that my classroom was too warm for their son as they didn't have central heating at home..... I did point out that he always refused to take off his very thick jumper even though he wore a shirt underneath.

Minky66 · 26/10/2013 21:41

I am a nurse (brown eyes and hair) and a patient complained because he had been told that he would be looked after by a blonde haired ,blue eyed nurse and was genuinely aggrieved that he was stuck with me instead!

AndHarry · 26/10/2013 21:52

In my first office job the MD got increasingly irate with me as I tried to explain why I couldn't use Google to search for a missing file.

Polyethyl · 26/10/2013 21:54

A tenant rented a flat from us which is above a station and on a major road junction. He then complained that he could hear the trains and cars. He made himself so unpleasant it was simplest to just agree to him breaking his tenancy and going.

manticlimactic · 26/10/2013 22:03

I work at a supermarket and a woman came in to complain about some grated cheese she had bought(first apologising for the ASDA carrier bag)as it was 3 days from it's use by date when she bought it (um it was in date when you bought it!). She was carrying on because she had forgotten her glasses and didn't read the date, couldn't bring it back until it was a week out of date, getting louder and louder as it was the shops fault she didn't read the use by date. In the end to shut her up calm her down I said I'd replace it, as it just wasn't worth the hassle of getting a manager. As she went to get her replacement I had a closer look at the packet as I hadn't seen that kind of cheese before and it was from ALDI. So not only had she brought it in an Asda bag it wasn't even our bloody cheese and I got a right shouting at. Couldn't wait for her to come back with her cheese so I could see her squirm.Grin

ImATotJeSuisUneTot · 26/10/2013 22:12

In my first office job the MD got increasingly irate with me as I tried to explain why I couldn't use Google to search for a missing file.

Love this!!!!!!! Grin Grin Grin

Weeditandreap · 26/10/2013 22:25

the movie is too loud and could we turn it down?!

killpeppa I've stopped going to our local cinema because the volume is turned up far too loud!

nomoreminibreaks · 26/10/2013 22:27

One of our numbers at work is one digit different to the local opticians. We get a lot of calls from those who are, well, most in need of the optician. The irony...

70isaLimitNotaTarget · 26/10/2013 22:28

Ooh , another strange one.
A lady I was treating asked my name:

"I'm Freda" I replied (obs not my real name^ )

"Oh not another Freda. " she said "My grandson was married to a Freda and she had an affair and left him with two children"

I was gobsmacked Shock (not at the affair but just WTF has that got to do with me)

It's like me saying "Oh not someone else with a walking frame. My NDN uses a walking frame and he's a right c**t"

killpeppa · 26/10/2013 22:29

weedit- honestly!
she came out and said she her daughter was 7 and she was worried about her ears.
don't come to High school musical then?!

banana87 · 26/10/2013 22:33

A potential client once complained that I didn't call them back even though they didn't leave a message and until receiving the complaint, I actually had no idea who they were.

FryOneFatManic · 26/10/2013 22:37

DP worked in a garden centre years ago. One old lady came in with a dead twig in her hand to complain her plant was dead, a year after she'd bought it. She even had her receipt.

So DP went through the care of the plant with her. Turns out (iirc) that a) she hadn't been watering it correctly and b) the weather in that year had not been right for the plant. Which, according to the company policy, she should have brought back complete, not just a twig, so they could check the plant over before deciding on refunds. So no refund because it looked like the plant died for lack of care.

She didn't like being told she wasn't going to get a refund, and took a swing at DP with a large, heavy handbag. If he hadn't blocked it, she'd have hit his face with that bag.

He still thinks it's funny that the little old lady swung her bag at him.