Do you dunk your penis?

[SaraCrewe]

I considered name changing for this, but, fuck it.

We have a dedicated post-sex cleanup area on the bedside table. A box of tissues, a small bin, and a beaker of clean water for temporary cleaning/dunking while the bathroom is occupied by me.

Apparently our penis beaker is strange and not the done thing.

Does everyone else just lay there in a sticky post coital glow until morning? Really?

This thread's made Fark now as well. First time I can ever recall a Mumsnet link there. I did a triple take.

Then I read said thread and did a spit take instead. Love it!

what about in hotels when there's a glass on your bedside table. are they just posh penis beakers?

I came here from facebook and joined this site specifically so that I could post!
Awesome thread, I have never laughed so much in my life...

Well to answer some questions, the way i do it is the male of the species puts his generating tool in my mount pleasant, he releases himself while quite far inside. This emerges at speed and with some velocity - propelling up even further. No clean up is therefore necessary.

What usually happens then is a day and a half later i will be talking to my boss by the photocopier. I will sneeze. . jizz will then be trickling out and i will make excuses and speed walk to the loo while squeezing my pelvic floor for all its worth.

So no point doing a 'clean up' immediately as there is nothing really to clean.

My conclusion is obviously the rest of you have slack fannies or i have a deformed u-bend in the vajinkle

gooner1414
""What if he still has a raging hard on? Does he plunge into it horizontally? Must cause serious spillage""

I'd go with

#t=89

MrsKoala - there is something wrong with you! i bet it smells rank

MrsKoala

Ive seen you dance here cdn.smosh.com/sites/default/files/ftpuploads/bloguploads/funny-honey-boo-boo-dance.gif

You dont get any so you cant make a conclusion

MrsKoala My mind is boggling at all this necessary clean-up after coitus.

All I leave behind after a good smashing is an asteroid belt full of rubble.

To whoever said they have a 'sex towel', that's RANK.

I use dh's underpants usually. Fling them at his head and go back to sleep.

I imagined their cleanup station like that too openminded hehe. My husband has just said he will stick to grabbing a t shirt to wipe his knob on after our sessions ;) knowing his luck he would forget it was a 'penis beaker' and drink it in the night.

BummyMummy77 He does you in your sleep

P.S Love the name

I find one of DP's socks (invariably on the floor by the bed) makes an ideal 'Jizla'.

I cant believe the women on here don't clean their fellas off after sex with a blowy its the best way to clean the little fella

i dislike the semen dribbles and hormonal birth control, so it's all condoms, all the time. no wet patch, no mess, no socks/towels/ penis beakers just sex wee and deal with my own lubey goop on the loo afterwards. MrFemPix just takes off the jonny and puts his pants back on. Although I do request he washes it if he wants to put it near my mouth. I got a glow in the dark pack recently and am waiting for the lightsaber willy giggles.

Mrs K, mebbe try a panty liner for those conversations with the boss?

Obvs not scented. (mebbe i should change my name to the healthyhappyfanjosquad)

www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=624204710953159&set=a.605792199461077.1073741825.124306287609673&type=1&theater

Churchill, latex and spermicide is not a good taste sensation!

Hmmm. It might upset the relationship balance if the pedicure-fish-in-a-glass turned out to deliver a better service than the missis for post-nookie cleanup nibbling.

LEM - it just smells like normal semen does actually! Why would it smell an different? It's not like air or bacteria is wooshing around up there. You're just well jel as i'm so tight

Yes Fem - pantyliners are in constant deployment

I'm disappointed because twats who aren't mners are coming on to make really stupid comments.

FemmyPix

Latex? wheres that flavor coming from.

Au Natural and a decent willing to make a guy happy woman is all thats needed

This thread has gone viral, it's all over Facebook!

MrsKoala

No need for bad language, there are ladies present in this thread.

I will never look at dairylea dunkers the same again

No doubt Churchill has always been happy to oblige.

Uh, the fact that hormonal BC makes me cranky as all hell and I am avoiding conception at all costs? Condoms work for me , have done for 10 years and my fanjo has a dress code.

We're not ladies! we're MNers! If anything this thread has demonstrated it's that we are definitely not ladies