Do you dunk your penis?

[SaraCrewe]

I considered name changing for this, but, fuck it.

We have a dedicated post-sex cleanup area on the bedside table. A box of tissues, a small bin, and a beaker of clean water for temporary cleaning/dunking while the bathroom is occupied by me.

Apparently our penis beaker is strange and not the done thing.

Does everyone else just lay there in a sticky post coital glow until morning? Really?

No. This I have not heard of. And a few of my friends are delightfully friendly with the men folk.

I'd run a mile from a bloke who got up and dangled his penis in a tumbler of water after shagging.

We have a box of tissues but don't have an issue with using bathroom together after sex. Can't see the issue if you have just had someone's knob in you why you wouldn't use the bathroom infront of them?

Reminds me of college where a friend of a friend informed me that her boyfriend could reach the bottom of a pint glass when he was "on the flop"

Not enough brain bleach in the world for that image

Good Fairylea is like us. We have tissues and I often pop for a wee but most of the time we're too busy falling asleep for such things. Sheet changing and washing is very regular here so I presume its fine.

Is this beaker identifiable as how do you not get it confused with other beakers in your house when washing it. Has it got a design?

Haha madcatlady

I refuse to believe not one other person cleans up while still in bed. Maybe not a beaker but a bowl? Baby wipes?

It was him warning his mate not to make squash in said sex beaker that outed us IRL. So if he gets stick it's his own fault. I used it as my pee beaker while TTC too, poor, abused beaker.

Noooo we don't have a penis beaker. We use the bathroom if we need to clean up. Like most people I should imagine.

OP I have to ask, do you have a specific depth of water in the penis beaker? I mean, with displacement, the water would overflow.

Ooh I just realised you could measure the displacement to work out the penis volume.

And then spring out of bed yelling "EUREKA!!!"

I have a trapped nerve in my neck and laughing at you fuckers has just made me yelp. Fill up the penis beaker! Is that dirty talk in your house then? We must be scumbags as apart from a post coital wee neither of us feel the need to start rinsing out any parts of our anatomy, he certainly doesn't violate any tooth mugs.

It's a big neon green one from poundland, really classy.

Or is it the mass. I forget.

Nomorecatlady.... The perfect knob dunking vessel!!!

Actually spat out my coffee opening that link!

Penis beaker, wank mittens (or was it socks?). MN is like a parallel universe some days.

Well I was having a bad day until I read this thread! Now I'm I hysterics! I've never owned a penis beaker or offered one to which ever husband or partner I happened to be with at the time! But I think to liven up my boring non existent sex life I will offer one to dh. It might make all the difference!

No, I'm sorry, but does no one else find it weird to be discussing penises with the Little Princess?

I just can't do it Sara!

Do you have it all on a tray covered with a small cloth and uncover it in a manner of a priest uncovering the communion wine & wafers? Is there little beads seen on the edge of the cloth to stops rogue breeze uncovering the penis clean up paraphernalia?

When I hear beaker I think of a small shallow cup.

If it can be easily dunked in one of those it cant be big

Tbh no, I have never been with a dunker. It is unusual but each to their own.

Couldn't he just use baby wipes until the bathroom is free?

I hope think you are alone on this one.

Also, those who have partners who wash them in the sink - firstly - how tall are these men and secondly ewwwwwwwww.

No we just wipe with a flannel and go for a wee. Anything more would totally ruin the comfortable drifting off into a sex coma :o

I use wire brush and dettol

Sink silly washers freak me out a bit anyway, not much better than wiping it on the curtains.

Does anyone else get the penis beaker when they have a drink at your house?! That would be awkward.

I've been around the block quite a few times (namechanged so you don't know it's me!!) I spent a few years as a swinger and have seen many different approaches to the postcoital cleanup, we prefer an old sheet shoved under the bed which is washed the next morning, I've seen baby wipes, tissues, underwear, one used the curtains, some didn't bother and I've seen people who clean each other after with their tongues!!
Your beaker is almost the weirdest!
(God I hope the name change worked!)

Wonderful

We both just go to the loo after sex. Me first.

Did you go shopping specifically for a penis dunking beaker? Were you in the shop and thought "Ah hah! DH's knob would fit in there nicely?"