Do you dunk your penis?

[SaraCrewe]

I considered name changing for this, but, fuck it.

We have a dedicated post-sex cleanup area on the bedside table. A box of tissues, a small bin, and a beaker of clean water for temporary cleaning/dunking while the bathroom is occupied by me.

Apparently our penis beaker is strange and not the done thing.

Does everyone else just lay there in a sticky post coital glow until morning? Really?

Have been enjoying reading this but it has exploded this afternoon.

For the record DH cleans his man-vagola with a nearby t-shirt or other item of suitably penile friendly clothing on the floor.

Crikey I've been trying to load & refresh that message since yesterday. Has this thread really slowed MN down?

This is all over the internet - I hope you're ok OP!

Great thread!

And they thought I was weird for having a sex-flannel ( under another NN).
Surely box of tissues on the bedside table is all you need? I know DH finds it hilarious to stick one to my face when he's done with it - we gauge how good the sex was by how many tissues were used afterwards If it was a six (mansize) tissue job, it was really good.

Could this be the one thread that every mumsnetter has commented on...and some extras. The one thread that binds us all! It's MN nirvana, we almost all agree on something.

I like to attach dental scaffolding to my penis during a blow job, which helps clean her teeth and flosses, prior to moving on to further shenanigans.

I prefer an oily rag lol

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha aaaarrrgg!!!
( Written heart attack )

God i love people. xxx

But not a heated hostess trolley KatieScarlett, any number of dangerous accidents waiting to happen there.

I have to say this truly is the first time I have really laughed out loud to a thread on here! Also gave my OH a good laugh!

I just hope no toddler will try to drink out of that beaker in the morning.

. . . so, let’s get this straight [!] there’s a water-glass half-full of homeopathic strength twatcum with those little crinkly ginger hairs floating in it (and probably dispersible-aspirin residue at the bottom, too - 'cos who knows how to clean the bottom of a glass?) and you knock it over as you reach out in the small hours groping for the Snooze button . . .

I think the [beaker] has to mean, "no, it really is just you, sorry".

Am I the only one who read the title and thought there was a typo for 'pens'?

We have towels which are usually folded up and put away, not spread out ready; tissues, which are usually out of reach and we do a wriggly dance to try and get to the tissues before (ahem) parting.

A beaker? Good God no! A large vase might be big enough, but our cat would push it off the table or get stuck in it.

This is a really fascinating topic and personally speaking we were both so concerned about the real and growing dangers that we had both read about,err never and nowhere of "Stinky bits in the sleep time syndrome" that we actually sold our car,one of my arms,a mint condition Millenium falcon,a pair of Jimmy Choose shoes and and the cat on ebay just to be able to finance the design and build of our recently patented "Stinky bits in the sleep time cleanerino 6000"
Now instead of just pulling up my Pyjama bottoms and down her oversized "Brighton Vets Dieppe rugby tour 2007" top and initiating a very quick high five for not waking up our daughter sleeping 15 yards away in another room,we both spring out on bed and after rubbing on the essential "Stinky bits in The sleep time cleaning sanitizer balm",also recently patented, we both jump in our cleanerino 6000,with relative ease.We are presently in talks with NASA and Starbucks about a possible franchise agreement,very exciting times.
daddydoesdaycare.blogspot.co.uk

pfffffffttttttt spits drink everywhere

Did anyone else almost choke at the innuend of the cat getting stuck in the vase or was that just me???

loving the idea of the cleanerino 6000 hehehe

On facebook the juxtoposition of this link and the image of the pregnant woman with her face screwed into a hmm face was hilarious. Looked like she'd mistaken the penis beaker for the water glass.

OP you're a bloody legend! You've made my day and I'd just like you to know you even managed to reach lil ol New Zealand! (Yes we do have internet down here can you believe!)

Can't say our post coitus ritual is as exciting as mixing a "cocktail" but good on you for asking the question ;) All the best!

Yy to [beaker] meaning 'no it really is just you'! Tech you have to do it now!

Love those t- shirts.

OP come back and tell us you and your DP are ok!

I think I now know far more about the publics sexual clean up acts than I feel I ought to.

I wonder if they'll be talking about this on the Wright Show this morning? They could get Katie Hopkins on This Morning too.

We don't dunk but I think it's a great idea. Neither of us really want to dash off. I tend to grab a wad of tissues and he does a bit of a wipe. Whilst we bask in the glow lol, hubby will raise one of his legs to prevent the duvet sticking against his still clammy groin. We refer to this as 'putting up the spunk tent'. I realise that you probably think that I am a romantic fiction writer from my erotic description.

Was lurking on here last night - made the commute aLoT quicker!
Have just read in this morning's metro about mn nearly crashing due to
Sara "Crowe"'s thread - wondering if the penis dunker is in fact the lovely Russel!

And no - we don't have a cock mug either, sorry

I have actually just had a call from a researcher from the Wright stuff and will now be doing a live phone interview about the Cleanerino 6000 on today's show!

PMSL at "spunk tent"