Mumsnet top 40

[LassieGoHome]

To the tune of I wanna dance with somebody

Clocks strikes upon the hour,
And the buns begin to fade.
Still enough time to figure out,
How to put my away.
I've done alright up 'til now,
It's the Daily Fail that shows me how,
And when the night falls, AIBU calls.


Oh! I wanna chat with somebody.
I wanna shoot the breeze with somebody.
Yeah! I wanna chat with somebody,
And be told YANBU.

[LineRunner]

lissie I love that song and I love your version.

[Tiredmumno1]

The end of Mumsnetters wanna have fun -

When the working day is done,
Oh MNers wanna have fu-un,
Oh MNers, just wanna have fun.

Some MNers take a boring thread,
and turn it into a funny classic,
I wanna be the one to be lots of fun,
Oh MNers wanna have fun.

(Copyright Tiredmum)

Not the best of finishes, I just didn't want to leave it with no ending

[FoundAChopinLizt]

I lie awake
There's a topic
Riddled by a troll

And do you know
The place to go

When you're feeling old?

The Style and Beauty thread
Will sort out your bed head

And if you think your love life's dead
Try Reationships instead

And through it all
You offer me affection
A lot of love and direction
Whether I'm right or wrong

And if you are a troll
I might just be a fake Me
So go ahead and hunt me

I'm reporting you instead.

[FoundAChopinLizt]

Angels, btw

[LineRunner]

ChopinLizt I just sang that

[nenevomito]

Bohemian Mumsnetty

Look how my life's changed
Since having the baby
I'm overwhelmed
By the choices that now face me
I'll go on line to have a whine and see
There is a forum
It holds answers for me

Because its baby come, baby grow
Toddler strop, school they go
Evil smelly teens then
Nest is empty again
You see.

Mumsnet, just fed my child
On a Gregg?s sausage roll
When he's just turned 6 months old

Mumsnet I've just had a race
Crashed my car into the last
Parent - child space

Mumsnet Oooooh
How did I miss that?
My husband was a lying cheating twat?
His affairs
Carried on
Should I just leave the bastard?

Too late, I have to go
I'm on here every night; I'm addicted to the site
Goodbye everybody; AIBU?
Going hide you threads and post in somewhere new.
Mumsnet Ooooh
I don't want to flounce
But sometimes wish I'd never logged on at all...

I see a little silhouette of a clique
No not us! No not us! We are really quiet lovely!
Put all the in-jokes on: Purpose of the thread gone eek!

You're so luffly
No your're luffly
You're so luffly
No YOU'RE luffly
You're so luffly
Luffs you so!

I'm gonna blow!

I'm just a step mum nobody loves me
She's just a step mum from a step family
Must not complain about her DSD.

Trends may come trends may go, Per Una is no
Yes Boden, though Per Una is a no
(it?s a no) Yes Boden! Per Una is a no
(it?s a no) Yes Boden! Per una is a no
(it?s a no) Una is a no
(It's a no) Una is a no (its a no) Ah
No, no, no, no, no, no, no!

Style and Beauty, Style and Beauty, Style and Beauty let me go
Beelzebub has some Mum Boots put aside for me
For me
For meeeeeeee!

(Mosh)

So you think your opion on here's all that?
Be it feeding or homework or kids who are fat?
Oh, baby, better breastfeed that baby,
Just gotta get out, just gotta get right outta here

But! Then we help each other, giving time for free,
That's what really matters,
That's what really matters to me...

In Bohemiam Mumsnet-eeeeeeeee!

[nenevomito]

I may have posted this one before, but....

Sockpuppet 2000

They always post within 5 mins of each other.
They claim to be friend or their sister or brother.
They are a sock puppet, sock puppet
and they annoy a bit
Oh they thought that when it kicked off,
they could name change and back up their stuff
oh They always do it, when they've been acting like a shit.

Oh Mumsnet, do you recall?
When the site was quite small,
You recognised us all.
and when the puppets came to call,
You'd notice them and banned them all.

So I said let's go an post on AIBU.
Won't it be fun to back up ourselves too.
Be there at 2 o'clock and I'll troll there about poo.
I can claim that I'm the OPs mate
And that I know fact! everything is true
Just to pointlessly get one over on you.

You post
Your Boyfriend left you

You were the first girl at school to get breasts.
Martyn said that yours were the best.
The boys all loved you but I was a mess.
I had to watch them trying to get you undressed.
We were friends but that was as far as it went.
I used to walk you home sometimes but it meant,
oh it meant nothing to you,
cos you were so popular.

Oh Mumsnet, do you recall?
When the site was quite small,
You recognised us all.
and when the puppets came to call,
We didn't notice them at all.

I said let's all meet up in the year 2000.
Won't it be strange when we're all fully grown.
Be there at 2 o'clock by the fountain down the road.
I never knew that you'd get married.
I would be living down here on my own
on that damp and lonely Thursday years ago.

Oh yeah,
oh yeah.

Oh Mumsnet, do you recall?
When the site was quite small,
You recognised us all.
and when the puppets came to call,
We didn't notice them at all.

I said let's all meet up in the year 2000.
Won't it be strange when we're all fully grown.
Be there at 2 o'clock by the fountain down the road.
I never knew that you'd get married.
I would be living down here on my own,
on that damp and lonely Thursday years ago.
Oh what are you doing Sunday baby.
Would you like to come and meet me maybe?
You can even bring your baby.
Ohhh ooh ooh. Ooh ooh ooh ooh.
What are you doing Sunday baby.
Would you like to come and meet me maby?
You can even bring your baby.
Ooh ooh oh. Ooh ooh ooh ooh. Ooh ooh ooh ooh. Oh.


This reminds me of school where you'd get the first line of a poem or essay and have to finish it off...

I'm disappointed, but not surprised that
I've not been banned yet, though I act like a twat
by starting threads all over this here website
with no purpose at all 'cept for stirring up shite.

[nenevomito]

oh COCK I've just posted the half written version.
Cock cock cock cock cock.
Let me go and find the proper one.

[FoundAChopinLizt]

Linerunner

Thanks, my life has meaning now

[WillYouDoTheFandango]

Get lucky by daft punk

She's up all night to throw buns
I'm up all night, I'm no hun
We're up all night it's such fun
We're up all night to check mumsnet

We've come too far
To admit that we are
Unreasonable
I am no troll
So fuck off
Wank badger

[lissieloo]

Ah, babyheave, I knew you'd come through

[LineRunner]

babyheave rhapsody is brilliant.

[SPsCliffingAllOverMN]

Baby You have mad skilz!

[SPsCliffingAllOverMN]

To the tune of Rudimentals 'Waiting all night'


I've been waiting all night for you to
update the thread, update, tell me, tell me that you did now
I've been waiting all night for you to
Oh, oh, update me with what you did yeah
I've been waiting all night for you to
update me with what you did, tell me, tell me what you did now

Quick one while I'm sat on the bus

[NaturalBlondeYeahRight]

I remember when I flounced off the first time
Saying, "This is it, I've had enough," 'cause like
People thought that I was a troll
So i said I needed space. (What?)
Then I come around again and say
"Mumsnet I miss you and I swear I'm gonna change, trust me."
Remember how that lasted for a day?
I say, "I hate you," I log off, you mail me, "I love you."

Ooh, I drank too much wine last night
But ooh, this time I'm telling you, I'm telling you

We are always, always, always gonna check the active
We are always, always, always gonna look for bunfights
I'll go check on my thread, check on your threads, check on me.
But we are never ever ever gonna leave mumsnet

Like, ever...


I'm really gonna miss the trolling fights
And me falling for it screaming that I'm right
And you would report, calm and find your peace of mind
With some thread title that's much cooler than mine

Ooh, you sent me a round up again tonight
But ooh, this time I'm telling you, I'm telling you

We are never, ever, ever leaving mumsnet
We are never, ever, ever leaving mumsnet

Ooh, yeah, ooh yeah, ooh yeah
Oh oh oh

Etc

[WillYouDoTheFandango]

Very good naturalblonde took me until ooooh to get the song and I had to start again

[KalevalaForMePlease]

Argh! So sorry! My last one is to the tune of the great Dolly Parton's 9 to 5

[KalevalaForMePlease]

Natural blonde, I love that one! Rhapsody is my favourite though

[SPsCliffingAllOverMN]

Very good.

Now That's What I Call Mumsnet

[lissieloo]

To Pulp's Common People


She lived down south, she had just had a baby
She thought that stay at home mums were lazy
She chose her name, and then was flamed
She posted that her H was loaded
I said "do you give your children coca-cola
She said "sure"
And then she goaded some more, she said

"I want to live like common people
I want to do whatever common people do
I want to talk with common people
I want to talk with common people like you"
Well what else could I do?
I said "I can see that you are new"

She said she shopped at a farmers market
I don't know why
But I had call her a silly mare
She didn't care
I said "do you ever shop at Asda"
but she just laughed
and said "I like their pasta"
I said "Yeah
I'm not sure you'll fit in here
Are you sure

you want to live like common people
you want to see whatever common people see
you want to sleep with common people
you want to sleep with common people like me?"
But she didn't know what to do
she just posted in AIBU

Use Ocado for your shop
Mumsnet haircut and ask "who's Cod?"
Wear some Boden and home school
Pretend you never act the fool
But still you'll never get it right
'cos when you're in a new bunfight
watching posters climb the wall
if you emailed HQ they could stop it all

[Sparklingbrook]

Can we have a vote MN?

[CatherineHMumsnet]

These are all brilliant. Now what we need is for someone to make us a mixtape playlist.

[Sparklingbrook]

Someone needs to find a singer. This could be in the shops for Christmas. We need to ring Gareth Malone!

[amazingmumof6]

I can sing

[Tiredmumno1]

I demand a free copy