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I've just cupped my CO's penis by accident.

291 replies

NobodyPutsMyBabyInTheCorner · 12/06/2013 14:50

I work at a friendly, very well known company and have since the very beginning of their existence. All of the original staff do hugs and kisses on the cheeks as we have worked through thick and thin together.

My CO came over to introduce me to someone who is hoping to become a corporate client and went in for a hug.

I was totally unprepared and only got one arm around, the other was left straggling and I accidentally cupped his balls.

WE BOTH KNOW I CUPPED HIS BALLS, we exchanged a 'I know you know I just felt your balls look'

I'm mning in the toilet, shuddering in shame. Sad

OP posts:
BookieMonster · 12/06/2013 17:11

Not that Matilda sounds that bothered!

BookieMonster · 12/06/2013 17:12

If it has the same degree of innate suction, bollockcup would be a winner.

THERhubarb · 12/06/2013 17:16

It would act as a protection aid (from cupping, stray hands) and a gatherer of bollock cheese.

NobodyPutsMyBabyInTheCorner · 12/06/2013 17:17

Bollockcupping- an invisible suction that draws hand to unsuspecting testicles

Man 1: 'I just got bollockcupped'
Man 2: 'yeah that happened to me last week on the tube'

My mum does always say theres always someone worse off than yourself...

OP posts:
NobodyPutsMyBabyInTheCorner · 12/06/2013 17:18

ergggggh, I didn't imagine an actual cup rubarb

OP posts:
THERhubarb · 12/06/2013 17:18

I feel a new hobby coming on Grin

THERhubarb · 12/06/2013 17:20

Anyone want to join me on pitching it to Dragon's Den?

NobodyPutsMyBabyInTheCorner can bollockcup Theo whilst I do the talking. And possibly Hilary as I'm sure she has a bollock or two....

TheOneWithTheHair · 12/06/2013 17:20

Thank you for cheering me up. Great thread. Grin

SybilRamkin · 12/06/2013 17:21

Crying with laughter at this thread!

But what if other colleagues saw it and are now jealous that they didn't get bollockcupped too? Perhaps if you do it to everyone it won't be so noticeably cringeworthy - it could be the new team bonding activity to promote unity at the office?

Matildaandthematches · 12/06/2013 17:22

It has only just occurred to me that essentially I have admitted to sexually assaulting hundreds of men on a public forum. Still, at least my victims don't have to look me in the face ever again. NPMBITC - if you go down for this, I've got your back ok? No one would mess with a couple of bollock-cuppers in clink.

BellaVita · 12/06/2013 17:24

Howling!

NobodyPutsMyBabyInTheCorner · 12/06/2013 17:25

I could bollockcup them all, I'm the fucking craziest bollockcupper out there

I think I've finally found my calling.

OP posts:
cafecito · 12/06/2013 17:25
Grin
Jestrin · 12/06/2013 17:26

Grin excellent thread! I am indebted to Talc for the visual

cafecito · 12/06/2013 17:26

tears of laughter here in a silent library fab diagram Talc! Grin

LadyClariceCannockMonty · 12/06/2013 17:26

Can we nominate this for Classics? Fair cheered up a wet Wednesday and in fact has been the highlight of the month so far in my sad little life

NobodyPutsMyBabyInTheCorner · 12/06/2013 17:27

That's a thought Sybil.. I've lost my bollockcupping mojo now. Gosh I hope he doesn't tell his wife, she already thinks I have cottonmouth.

OP posts:
NobodyPutsMyBabyInTheCorner · 12/06/2013 17:28

I think I might change my nn..

OP posts:
CelticPromise · 12/06/2013 17:28

Hahahahahahaaaaa Grin

Genius thread.

CelticPromise · 12/06/2013 17:31

Matilda are you sure you don't have to see them again? I imagine a crowd of keen repeat cuppees surrounding you on your regular commute. Empty seats down the rest of the train Grin

BollockCupper · 12/06/2013 17:31

Does twirl and waves fingers of ball cupping hand Grin

QueenFaeriecakes · 12/06/2013 17:31

Laughing out loud at this thread, DS just called me a weirdo

topbannana · 12/06/2013 17:34

Hahaha, very funny :o
I almost did the same to a very tall young lad at work last night. I felt a whisp of trousers material and snatched my hand back sharpish (unlike matilda arf arf!)
To add to this when the matter came up in conversation later he confessed to not even noticing
A personal low point in my life when my attempted groping of young men is not even noticed

mymatemax · 12/06/2013 17:35

omg, did it spring to attention?

PostBellumBugsy · 12/06/2013 17:37

Shudders at mymatemax's question - but probably not as much as NPMBITC!!!!!

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