Oh. My toaster has gone missing.

[CauldronsTrulyReign]

There's just a big gap on the work surface well, besides some crumbs.

What the actual croissant?

spot of acronym decoding malfunction

@ cervix

Ok I can provide Boden cat and babyliss BH.

A Boden CAT???

This is a case for The Sweeny.

Cue music and Reagan and screeching tyres in a baby poo coloured Cortina.

This will end up happily dahhn the pub

Okay. I really need to get to bed. Return the toaster and no one gets hurt...

My cheese grater has been missing for 5 weeks. FIVE WEEKS. Perhaps it is the ringleader of all these missing kitchen items.

Do you think all of these kitchen implements are armed and have a headquarters in yonder hills?

I used to have 17 rammekins and now I have three......................

[ponders and has a sense of deja vue]

Bet you knew I was going to write that

Ok listen up people.

The fugitive toaster has been missing for 8 hours. It's time to call in the US Marshals. We need a hard-target search of every gas station, residence, warehouse, farmhouse, henhouse, outhouse and doghouse in the area.

Go get him!

This is what happens when you put microchips in domestic items. They start to think for themselves, decide that a life of food preparation isn't for them, and bugger off together to Barbados.

I'm going to issue the coordinates for the exchange shortly. Please confirm you have all the items.

It will be a UK location and I will provide an Ordinance Survey 6 digit grid reference.

I think Dr. Who landed the Tardis in Chaos's Kitchen, and took the toaster for essential repairs to the Tardis control panel.

HTH

Caulds

Have you noticed a tiny little suit of armour in your hallway or an unusual new lamp with an over large shade on your hall table?

The toaster may be 'hiding' you see.

This is not a small toaster floks.

It is a 4piecer.

PuzzlementTrulyReigns.

It's a pity that the toaster doesn't have GPS tracking, you'd soon find the kidnapper that way Cauldron.

I think you made the toaster up. It was all a dream. Did you wake up this morning in the shower?

Maybe Kevin snuck into your kitchen and removed it as a crime against good taste

I am going to bed. I have ten slices of toast to make for breakfast.

I'll give you a new toaster if you take me along to meet Kevin...

Told my Dh about this earlier and he wasn't interested he thinks MN is daft but he just saw me on here and then asked about the 'Toaster' and he is quite sure your DH has it hidden in his workshop or knows what has happened to it which is why he is not worried that it has disappeared.

These are the coordinates for the drop: NO 26119 94367

Be there at sunrise with the ransom. If anyone guesses my true identity the deals off and the toaster gets it's element removed. No Old Bill.

I know what has happened here. Someone else has used Cosmic Ordering to get a toaster. And the universe nabbed yours.

IHaveYourToaster I am disappointed that you didn't say "Come Alone" - kidnappers always say "Come Alone".

Arf at IHaveYourToaster having a profile