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Original poster

As the name suggests, I am sadly (but not that sadly) doing a shiney penguin....

1001 replies

sadlydoingshineypenguins · 24/08/2011 07:52

Quick potted history. With boyfriend 9 months. Not that serious but we had had the exclusive talk. Met on a dating site.

About a month ago had a feeling something wasn't right. Few nights he was supposed to be here and cancelled for dopey reasons that set my spidey sense tingling.

Looked on the dating site and lo and beholdy there is was, active, having logged in in the last 24 hours.

But I am not as stupid as he thinks I am.

I set up a profile called thisblokeliesandcheats (it's been taken down) with all his details except photo and spelled out what he'd done (thanks whoever that was who suggested that one) and I will probably do it again

At this point he's said he's coming here Thursday night to stop for the weekend (he doesn't work Friday)

BUT he has also arranged to meet "Anna" off the dating site at a lovely new restaurant for lunch on the Friday about an hour away from here (half an hour from his house)

Obviously, I am Anna.

So, how long do I keep this going. My teeth are itching I want to tell him so much Grin

Am also a little upset, but I had nothing invested in the relationship, so my pride has taken a hit and I feel a bit of a mug but other than that am grand.

OP posts:
buggerlugs82 · 25/08/2011 12:55

This reply has been withdrawn

This post has been withdrawn due to privacy concerns.

messymammy · 25/08/2011 13:14

OP, I'm in Dublin too, incase you get angry again and want to do an Anna flashmob.
Sorry he's suck a dick, you will laugh about him in time.

Mouseface · 25/08/2011 14:23

Nice one purpleflower Grin

Sadly - sorry you're feeling low today. Here.......

I think you should stick to Anna dumping him for having a face like it's been set on fire and smacked out with a spade. Grin

It's still a humiliation dump. I can imagine he thinks he's Jeff's gift to women. Wank stain.

Keep going! You can do this x

venusandmars · 25/08/2011 16:07

I'd go with the suggestion that Anna doesn't turn up. Love the idea that she doesn't like how he looks, plus perhaps she could say she was confused because he looked very like her friend's boyfriend.

By this time you will have dumped him (not mentioning Anna) and he will never know if he has been found out or not. Would he dare to ask you?

lubeybooby · 25/08/2011 16:19

Well, if no Anna flashmob then I definitely agree he should be 'dumped' by 'Anna' based on his looks and properly dumped by sadly on account of being a lying cheating bellend

Original poster
sadlydoingshineypenguins · 25/08/2011 17:24

Hi all sorry not been able to get on computer to MN today was actually busy at work

Have decided definitely just to have Anna stand him up - keep him late then text to say she looked and saw him and isn't interested

And I will do the simultaneous dump.

If I tell him I'm Anna it could get into a whole tit for tat thing and I don't want that.

Plus, then he will think some woman finds him ugly and repulsive - and he thinks he's God's gift

Bath and chocolate and coffee with wine later I think Smile

OP posts:
OTheHugeRaveningWolef · 25/08/2011 17:35

Yay! Anna thinks he's minging.

Original poster
sadlydoingshineypenguins · 25/08/2011 17:38

I reckon the simultaneous dumping will be around 1.30 tomorrow afternoon if you all want to get your popcorn ready Smile

OP posts:
Portofino · 25/08/2011 17:39

I am in a MEETING then!

Original poster
sadlydoingshineypenguins · 25/08/2011 17:45

Well porto that's just not good enough. You will have to make your excuses Grin

OP posts:
MyNameIsInigoMontoya · 25/08/2011 18:03

What about Anna making some reference to cheating when she dumps him? She could say she was going to cheat on her current bloke with him, but changed her mind because she realised how wrong that would be and how honesty is so important... (and that your P wasn't worth it on account of the physical repulsiveness Grin). Or maybe that she didn't fancy your P as he looked like the type who might cheat?

Might help him to think about why you have dumped him too and whether it's more than a little coincidental?

SuePurblybilt · 25/08/2011 18:05

Honestly, I'd let Anna dump him cos he is a minger, innit and then dump him yourself. That way he thinks that two women in one week find him repulsive. If you hint about the cheating, he'll just write you off as a bunny boiler and you may as well not have bothered.

MumPotNoodle · 25/08/2011 18:10

After he is stood up by Anna I imagine the OP will get a text inviting her to lunch......there is her opportunity to double dump him.

Original poster
sadlydoingshineypenguins · 25/08/2011 18:11

How's about Anna dumps him because he's a minger and he looks too old?

And then I dump him because it's just not working out for me?

OP posts:
goodasgold · 25/08/2011 18:15

I will wear a stripey top tomorrow whilst you do all the dumping. Nice that you get to do it twice.

thederkinsdame · 25/08/2011 18:21

I think you should dump him first OP then he can go to his " date" thinking he's moving on. Lo and behold Anna stands him up andyo add insult to injury tells him it's because he was old

Original poster
sadlydoingshineypenguins · 25/08/2011 18:30

Going for stage 1 - a bath.

Will be back later ladies.

I am so glad he's not coming here tonight I never ever would have been able to keep up the pretence.

OP posts:
HedleyLamarr · 25/08/2011 18:35

Good luck with the simultaneous dumping OP. He doesn't deserve you.

Euphemia, just for you here's the penguin thread. It's a belter.

HeidiHole · 25/08/2011 18:35

1:30pm eh? totally clears diary and ensures laptop will be fully charged

I may just tune in! :o

lubeybooby · 25/08/2011 18:39

Sounds good OP, well not sure if good is the right word, but definitely the least he deserves! I will be here 1.30 for sure!

Really sorry he turned out like this. But big well done to you for handling it like this.

happymole · 25/08/2011 19:00

Loved flashmob idea :)

I would go with text

X have just seen you outside the restarant and a bit of sick came in my mouth. You have the most physically repulsive face i have ever seen, opps i'm retching again. Seriously you look like a donkeys arsehole, and i suspect your penis is the size of a cocktail sausage. Clearly i'm not meeting you. Have a fabbo day, love and xx

Then throw the phone away.....

MummyAnnabella · 25/08/2011 19:07

Oh please where in Ireland are you? Please let me go with my 3 boys under 3 in tow.

Mouseface · 25/08/2011 19:13

sadly - I think that is very wise of you, not letting him know you are Anna. I think he would seek some form or revenge.

I think the (DD) Double Dumping is the way forward, especially if you can give him a number of different reasons from you and Anna.

Like Anna thinks he's as ugly as a warthogs arse, too old and not her type physically, and you, well, maybe you could tell him that you've had a change of heart about being exclusive?

You feel that you're not ready to commit just yet..... you're just not that into him....... you feel that you may be missing out on what life has to offer by 'settling' for him? Grin

You need to lay it on nice and thick.

I bet you the epic DD will take the wind out of his shitty little sails that night!

Good luck. I hope you do meet someone that deserves you. You sound really fab. Smile x

Berries · 25/08/2011 19:20

Think I'd take a lovely happy photo of me and 'anna' tonight and then text it to him with a 'had a great time with mate' type message, just to see how he wriggled out of it :o

minipen · 25/08/2011 19:34

Could you say you saw him get out of (insert make of his car) just to make him feel watched and hopefully creeped out, sorry you have struggled today

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