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Original poster

Strange / silly rules at work

329 replies

melpomene · 21/01/2011 19:15

What strange or silly rules do you have in your workplace?

Here are some examples from the office where I work:

  • My colleagues asked if we could have a small bookcase, because we have heaps of reference books on the desks and a bookcase would make it much easier to store and find them. We were told that it is against the policy to have bookcases or shelves, and that "if we got a book case then people would put things on it".
  • They provide pencils but not pencil sharpeners, so when your pencil gets blunt you have to throw it away and get a new one.
  • In the canteen, they sometimes serve vegetable curry. They also serve rice.
However, you are not allowed to have vegetable curry with rice. You are allowed to have vegetable curry with a baked potato, or chicken curry with rice, but not vegetable curry with rice Confused.

Has anyone else got any silly rules?

OP posts:
JetLi · 21/01/2011 20:22

We asked about some kind of long service awards for staff - you know the kind of thing where you would get an extra days holiday after 10 years service or whatever.
It was declined on the basis that it was discriminator towards staff that were not long serving Hmm

wondery · 21/01/2011 20:24

An old flat mate of mine worked for a christian dior counter.
The list of rules was 2 a4 pages including.

nails must be no shorter than 5mm from the tip of the finger and must be painted in the current seasons colour.

you must wear full make-up at all times, this specified a concealer, foundation and powder base with the current seasons colours on your cheeks lips and eyes.

Check your teeth for lipstick

you MUST wear deodorant

you must use breathmints.

you must wear the perfume that was on promotion.

mind you-she did used to get all the make-up for free.

CountessVonKnackerstein · 21/01/2011 20:32

wondery that doesn't sound that bad! Grin

TrillianAstra · 21/01/2011 20:38

What happens if you break a nail wondery?

xstitch · 21/01/2011 20:39

I worked somewhere where you weren't allowed to have any bruises, scratches or scrapes.

Somewhere else you had to wear tights and never stockings as apparently it was unhygienic. The boss used to ask if he could check (pervert). In the same place all ladies had to wear the same length of skirt as in cm length of skirt not how many cm below the knee. I am a shorty so used to trip over.

ohnelly · 21/01/2011 20:39

I worked in a bakery, and if there were any bread/cakes etc left at the end of the day they had to go in the bin Angry
If you ate a cake before you went out of the door that was fine, but if you took it outside you were stealing - what a waste!

goodasgold · 21/01/2011 20:59

ohnelly that reminds me of when my best friend and I worked at the bakery counter of Safeway. When we were 16/17. It all had to get thrown away.

One day there was a power cut and when the lights went back on the manager was standing in front of us and we were caught red handed stuffing our faces full of maple syrup doughnuts.

I think that I left and she got the sack.

ThatsNotMyAlpaca · 21/01/2011 20:59

We ha a no bobble hat rule. You could wear literally anything you like but no bobble hats.

And i mean anything, someone once fashioned a dress out of a potato sack and wore it.

goodasgold · 21/01/2011 21:00

She also phoned in sick one day and then went in to buy food to have a picnic with her boyfriend.

Suncottage · 21/01/2011 21:00

I am 'in charge' of the feng shui of the building as appointed by my chairman.

WTF - I make it up as I go along Grin

I use lots of pebbles, red ribbons and make people move their desks to increase productivity.

I sometimes move the pebbles to see if we go into economic meltdown but he never notices and we haven't, but burying crystals under gravel at four points of the building in the pouring rain was not fun.

We have a feng shui master who comes in every six months to check up on me.

I shit you not.

OgreTripletsAreSoCute · 21/01/2011 21:02

Not allowed to carry hot drinks up and down the stairs for safety reasons

Not allowed to carry any cup of liquid if it didn't have a lid on it.

Not allowed to walk across a flat patch of gravel in case you fell over on it

Dress code that specified "no thongs" meant as flip flops but caused much hilarity.

romanygypsywitch · 21/01/2011 21:02

o how funny these are!

WonderingStar · 21/01/2011 21:09

friend of mine works for an oil company, who are of course, very keen on all things health and safety. but they apply their rules to offices as they do to oil rigs. so:

  • if you use the stairs, you MUST hold the hand rail at all times
  • no hot drinks carried anywhere without a lid
  • all meetings, of any duration and no of attendees start with an obligatory pointing out of the fire exits by the meeting Chair. Usually this is the one door in the meeting room that everyone came in by. the meeting is not allowed to start until this has been done and noted.
InspirationalBreadbin · 21/01/2011 21:14

On everyone's first day at my company, they get issued with a travel mug. This began after the 'whose coffee did i just slip on' wars of 2007.

Suncottage · 21/01/2011 21:16

One crackpot boss who ordered his staff (two of us) not to discuss work between us. We worked at desks three feet apart!

He then told us not to discuss personal issues either.

We pushed notes into each others handbags for two weeks until he realised what we were doing and ordered us to present our handbags 'for inspection'. We both walked out that day as he wouldn't let us do any work either because 'he could handle it all'.

Why the hell did he hire us? Confused

We sat in silence for four weeks doing nothing at all.

bran · 21/01/2011 21:16

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MrsSchadenfreude · 21/01/2011 21:16

I used to work in an office where the last person out had to unplug the photocopier and lock the plug in a hamburger-type box. The key then had to be placed in a cupboard in another room.

I have a friend whose office still decrees that women can't wear trousers. Unfortunately no-one thought to mention this to her and she turned up in trousers on the first day. They wanted to send her home to change...

bran · 21/01/2011 21:25

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

breatheslowly · 21/01/2011 21:25

We aren't allowed a kettle. People have been known to smuggle them in and keep them in a desk drawer. Apparently kettles aren't safe enough for us to be allowed to use. Hmm

BoffinMum · 21/01/2011 21:27

We are not allowed to drink alcohol between 9 and 5. We all have irregular hours contracts, and keys to the building, so it is OK to get hammered at 8.55am or 5.05pm and then type an academic paper under the influence, but not during the 'day'. This was not debated, not even officially announced, but we found out at the Christmas party last year that it would apply from January.

Nobody bothered organising a Christmas party this year.

stewmaker · 21/01/2011 21:28

Oh I've had the no kettle rule! in the days when we smoked at our desks!!

Once we were given promotional stuff and it was a fridge magnet with the new 'character' on it. Cue IT coming round to ask everyone to remove magnets from PCs oops!
Not a silly rule, but a silly gift....

SharonGless · 21/01/2011 21:31

When we used to have a canteen the staff decided that you could only have poached egg on certain days as it was soooo difficult to make them! On the other days you could have scrambled egg. Trouble being that the days weren't set so if they couldn't be arsed with poached egg then they just made it up that it was scrambled egg only today!

Suncottage · 21/01/2011 21:35

Oh my god I worked in a 'no kettle' office. It was because the bosses said that staff 'would talk around it'

We had to supply our own milk, tea, coffee, sugar and use the hot tap!

FakePlasticTrees · 21/01/2011 21:35

My old place shoes should be closed toe, as apparently toes are "too erotic" for the work place.

Portofino · 21/01/2011 21:35

breatheslowly, that makes me think of my 3 weeks on the antenatal ward - we were all about to become responsible parents, but H&S rules meant that we were not responsible enough to make a cup of tea as we might injure ourselves with boiling kettle water, ffs.