Need to name and shame kid friendly restaurants without single sex toilets

[Alicedaisy888]

I've come across 2 'kid friendly' restaurants with toilets that open out onto communal sink areas. I have unfortunately found this out while out with my 8 year old daughter after we had booked and ordered food. We need to try and pressure restaurants that market themselves as child friendly to display their toliet policies on the website so we can make the choice to book or not. I would love to have a list of those that don't have single sex toliets as policy. I know Giraffe don't guarantee single sex and Bills Restaurants have a chain policy of 'communal' toliets in all of them. Can anybody add to this ?

What you're describing is a large single private toilet.

Do you not understand that single-sex loos mean single-sex sink areas?

What’s to stop a man being in the ladies toilets waiting for a little girl to come in alone though

There is no legal requirement for restaurant owners to provide single sex lavatories.

For customers, no. For staff, yes.

That's what Katie Dolatowski's 10 year old victim's dad thought.

Me or someone like me saying "hey, what the hell do you think you are doing in here?" Another man seeing him go in and saying "mate, that's the women's." A staff member seeing him go in and kicking him out. All of which were considerably more nerve-wracking legally this time last week.

What's stopped them before then?

Lot's of adult women are assaulted in public bathrooms too, should no female use public bathrooms them?

I'm just saying that, as much as I personally don't like unisex toilets, I'm not sure single sex ones are necessarily the most family friendly solution.

Nothing, but virtually every situation that takes place outside the home. We all have a different attitude to risk. At one extreme are people who live on the edge, expecting disaster at every turn. Others are more sanguine and know that the probability of bad things happening, like a man waiting in a ladies loo, is small.

And what prevented cross dressing men going into the ladies in the past? Or indeed any men? Because something was.

Do you think that adding more men to the loos women and girls use will make loos safer for women and girls somehow? Do you think that adult women out alone and teen girls shopping alone wouldn't be in more danger from men if loos become unisex? I'm in my forties and go everywhere alone. My dad's eighty and waiting for a knee replacement, he's not in a position to guard me from 6ft2 rapists whilst I use the loo.

What's safer for women is a different argument to what is better for families.

Not true. They can provide unisex toilets for staff (as long as they are fully enclosed).

a) Peer enforcement, and b) service providers being legally sure that they could kick a man out of the women's loo without being sued. The GRA2004, coupled with widespread misrepresentation of EA2010, had a profound chilling effect on that. Result: Dolatowski.

Hence places that position themselves as family-friendly need to make family-friendly loos. Being able to let your 10yo DD go to the loo alone is part of that.

I can't imagine any setup where I would be comfortable letting my 10 year old child go to the loo alone, in today's world.

Yes. I was simplifying on purpose because my key point is that a big unisex room with cubicles and a sink area is not compliant with the Workplace (Health Safety and Welfare) Regs 1992.

You're correct.

At that age, I walked to school alone and had done for several years. A year later, I was riding a public bus alone to get to school.

10 year-olds have to go to the loo alone at school, Brownies, Cubs...

What does a single parent of more than one child do? Leave the food on the table to take all the kids to the loo because one needs to go and hope that the waitstaff don't clear it away whilst the table is unattended?

As a child of divorced parents, I can tell you from experience of being out with just one parent that the answer can't be "escort your kids everywhere".

These days I send them together but yes I used to take them all - usually before the food was likely to turn up.

Brownies and school is a different kettle of fish to a restaurant

Guiding UK allows men with special gender feelz to be volunteers, so you might rethink the appropriateness of your DD going to the loo alone at Brownies.

I think I must have really low standards because all I want from a public toilet is for it to be free of other people's bodily fluids.

Honestly, it’s ludicrous stuff like this that makes it really hard for those of us with genuine and reasonable concerns re: trans rights / self ID etc to have reasonable discussions without just being labelled as bigots.

If you are this obsessively concerned about toilets in restaurants you shouldn’t eat out.

I prefer communal sinks so you can easily wash your hands rather than be stuck in a tiny cubicle next to the toilet. It's also great if you just want to wash your hands as you often do with kids.