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See all MNHQ comments on this thread

We Believe You: we're launching our rape awareness campaign today.

530 replies

KateMumsnet · 09/03/2012 15:56

Today, we're very proud to be launching a new campaign. It's called 'We Believe You', and it's inspired by the many MNers who've asked us to speak out about the prevalence of rape and sexual assault in women's lives.

While we're at it, we're going to try to explode, once and for all, some pernicious myths about rape - about who does it, what it is, and whom it can happen to. These myths mean that many victims are denied justice: our survey confirmed that most don't report their rape or sexual assault, for fear of being disbelieved.

So the message of our campaign is in the title - we believe you. We hope MNers will get behind it, and spread that message far and wide - on Facebook, and on Twitter, using the hashtag #webelieveyou. And don't forget to let us know what you think here on this thread.

We're also giving a shout-out to Rape Crisis, the End Violence Against Women coalition, and Barnardo's - all of whom are supporting our campaign. They all work hard on sexual violence issues - either by supporting those who've experienced it, or campaigning for better prevention strategies - so do see if you can help them out.

MNHQ x

OP posts:
Elsbet · 17/03/2012 23:11

Thank you on behalf of my beautiful daughter both of us are incredulous and bitterly disappointed that the rest of the family could not believe her or support her. This campaign is of vital importance.

AnyFucker · 17/03/2012 23:30

Elsbet, I believe your daughter, and I believe you x

BasilFoulTea · 18/03/2012 06:47

Me too Elsbet
I hope your daughter gets the support your family won't give her.

Mouseface · 18/03/2012 13:56

I believe you and your DD Elsbet Sad

MerlinScot · 18/03/2012 14:41

To all the posters who kindly commented on here, I'd like to make them notice that only posting on this thread saying "we believe you" means a lot to women who have been raped.

As someone posted earlier in the thread, for me not being believed pulled me back months in the recovering process, I'm so shocked about what is happening to me that I'm in a tearful spell all the time.

When rape occurred I had been already in an abusive relationship for 7 months and I realised only later that the source of my deep depression and nightmares was indeed my partner/abuser/rapist.

munkysea · 18/03/2012 16:20

I believe you.

skrumle · 18/03/2012 19:12

i believe you

McHappyPants2012 · 18/03/2012 20:25

Good luck to MN in this campaign.

I hope more people speak up about there awful experience of being raped

squeezed · 18/03/2012 21:17

All I can say is thank you

blowcushion · 19/03/2012 01:15

I didn't even know that I had been raped at a young age as didn't understand what was going on! Realised that something wrong had happened but was only worried that my mother was going to go mad at me as I would be late home from school and she would want me to go to the shops. Never told anyone. It was a long time ago.

AnyFucker · 19/03/2012 08:59

I believe you, blow and I am so sorry that happened to you

smilingthroughgrittedteeth · 19/03/2012 12:12

Its taken me all weekend to read this thread as I just couldn't stop cryin, but seeing the words "we believe you" gave me the strength to tell my DP about the terrible thing that happened in my past that still affects me now, I have never told anybody and couldn't even look at him when I told him as I was so convinced no one would believe me or worse that they would think it was my fault, when I finally got to the end of my story and looked up it was to see my DP with tears streaming down his face, the first words he said were " it wasn't your fault, I believe you" I can't describe the relief I feel at knowing its not my 'dirty' secret anymore and I want to thank MN and all the people who have posted their stories for believing me x

Elsbet · 19/03/2012 12:12

Nobody should have to just get on with it after rape. Rape is about power not sex and anybody, male, female,child, OAP is at risk. It doesn't matter what you wear , where you are, drunk or sober, nothing is a precursor to rape only the sick mind of the perpetrator. There needs to be available centres all over the country that are set up ready to support victims whoever they are. At least campaigns like this blow open the secrecy and shame so others can come forward. Stand proud people you did nothing wrong let's point the finger at the people who have! Big love to you all x

Elsbet · 19/03/2012 12:16

I believe you, it's not a dirty secret its a terrible crime that has been committed against you. Big proper nice motherly hug from me x

AnyFucker · 19/03/2012 12:17

smiling I am glad you found some validation through MN, and you have done a good thing for yourself to talk about what happened to you with your DP.

it wasn't your fault, and we believe you

< stands shoulder to shoulder with Elsbet against the victim-blamers >

JugglingWithTangentialOranges · 19/03/2012 12:23

Hi smiling - glad you were able to tell your DP and to hear of his great response - he sounds like a good man.

Wondering if you might even consider changing your NN now that you've been able to do this ? Just a thought ! Smiling somethingelse perhaps ?

  • through sunshine and rain ?
  • through the tears ?

All the best to you and all survivors anyway Smile

smilingthroughgrittedteeth · 19/03/2012 12:39

Thank you my DP is a good man and I am forever grateful that he is mine this just proves how amazing he is.

Telling him is the hardest thing I have ever done and for now its where I draw the line, maybe one day I will (with his support) feel able to tell my family.

I'm rather attached to my nn for now but my smile feels much easier than it did.

JugglingWithTangentialOranges · 19/03/2012 12:51

That's good to hear ...

As my NN suggests I was just going off on one of my tangents !

Please ignore !

HandDivedScallopsrgreat · 19/03/2012 12:57

Smiling and blow you are both very brave women. And I believe you.

MerlinScot · 19/03/2012 14:24

I found that this campaign, in only one week, is raising more awareness all over the U.K. than all the previous attempts from different organizations combined together. This thread has already 445 comments!!

These days I was also thinking to give my contribution to "our fight", in order to make more people aware (including the justice system!!) that we're ready to fight against injustice, mistreatment and investigations led in a hurry!!
WE NEED TO BE BELIEVED. Or otherwise abuse and rape will always be considered "legal" because too many abusers and rapists get away with it.

I opened a forum for women who live in my county and area:

abuserapehighlandsforum.blogspot.co.uk/

Megfox · 19/03/2012 17:31

I don't know where to begin telling my story......Subjected to endless molestations by my father from aged eleven. Raped at fiteen. Got into trouble at sixteen - drug offence - and sent to a remand home. Sexually asaulted by a senior member of staff.

Got pregnant soon after release and miscarried. Treated like dirt in hospital.

Pregnant again at seventeen. Dumped by boyfriend.

Married ten years later and subjected to forced sex whenever husband wanted it.....

JugglingWithTangentialOranges · 19/03/2012 17:39

Oh, megfox, I'm so sorry for everything you've been through.

All those people who should have treated you better.

All those offences against you.

We believe you.

I hope the future holds better things ...

MmeLindor. · 19/03/2012 19:24

Megfox
I believe you, and I hope you can get some support in RL to help you get through this.

Smiling
I am glad that you were able to tell your DH and that he is a good man, and a wonderful support to you.

Onesunnymorningin2012 · 19/03/2012 19:33

((((hugs)))) to all who have been through rape and sexual assault.

I believe you.

AnyFucker · 19/03/2012 22:10

Meg, I am so sorry x