D'y ever wonder how life got like this?

[FrumpyGrumpy]

New to MN but like what I read so far. Struggling to get by day by day at the minute and feeling isolated but not enough to make the effort to join in the 'groups' the whole world seems to think are just what I need!!!!

Have daughter of 4 and girl and boy twins of eight months. Not had time since they were born when all three kids have been well, am I just cursed? Throw in a house move that took 6 months, a partner that works away most of the week and a mother-in-law I can wait another lifetime to deal with and I've ended up the sort of person I used to look at and wonder how life got like that.

Anyone give me hope that when the babes are eighteen months I'll feel better?!! If not, anyone tell me that alternate nights of gin then chocolate is an ok passage through?

Yeah, I get that too. Usually when they are both having a hairy fit in the Tesco trolley and slapping each other until they cry. I take food and drink and chat to them and give them things to hold but you still get looked at as though (a) you shouldn't bring them out or (b) like you can do something. I make eye contact with no one at times like that and develop selective hearing . Its hard though esp when you have reached the end of the patience allowance for the day! What I get a giggle at is when someone gets brave enough to think they can intervene and help by chatting to them ...........

Guess what!!!! I'm having a leg wax tomorrow morning . Watch out around 10am when the world will get a little brighter, like when the eclispe clears.....

Wish I was brave enough to do that! I am a wax virgin and will remain so for the forseeable future!

I nearly yelled at someone to come and 'do soemthing' yesterday, when the dts were screaming and tearing strips out of each other over a little tikes lawn mower. Two silly bints were smiling and pointing and the cute little dts. In the end I left them scrapping, and hunted down a second lawn mower. dt1 was still wailing so I picked him up with his fist still wrapped around a dangling lawn mower as the looks got slowly more dissaproving. By this time I nearly threw the mower at them!!

Trolleys are a nightmare too, they are always so wide that it is impossible to maneuvere through the checkout with at least one dt grabbing items from a conveyer belt in the pursuit of a career in theft! Actually dt2 surpassed himself in waitrose yesterday, managed to lean over and ring up a load of extras on the till.

I love them to bits but they are crazy at this age. I could have throttled dt2 this morning for breaking a lampshade on a £150 lamp. He lvoes to touch everything and the more forbidden the better.

Oh Kelly this is just all so familiar, like when you head down an aisle and its really narrow (Boots seem the worst) and they each grab something from their own side, unsettling the contents of the shelf in the process.

Mine are squabbling over toys quite a lot too. Its the noise that gets me the most, the constant call for attention from all areas. Sometimes when it all gets too much I just ignore them (as long as they are safe) and carry on doing dishes or laundry. Sometimes they sort it themselves. Then in a lovely moment (today) they held hands and sang the same song and made each other laugh. That was priceless and made my heart swell. Next summer we'll be cooking with gas Kelly, just wait for those posts........."Kelly, today the kids were on dinner rota so I read Hello in the garden while they lovingly each prepared a starter, main and pudding.....they brought out a gin and tonic at 4pm and no one made a sound AND the house remained sparking clean while I sat on my wobbly and hair free arse and felt proud"

In the leg hair department I have much so its the easiest option, and sometimes its agony and sometimes it hurts not a bit, depends on how good the therapist I think. My angel gave up 5 years ago to have a baby and I've yet to find anyone as good as her.

Bath time..... happy nights x.

Hi girls. The potty training is going well.

FG.... FIRE THAT WOMAN NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Can't believe I've only just read that.

My doula-ing is beginning to take off. I'm meeting 2 women tomorrow.. 1 for postnatal work only and the other is expecting twins lol and wants a birth doula and a postnatal doula. Am doing some PN work next week for a friend who is going to recommend me to others and I signed my first paid contract on Wednesday for a September birth. How fab is that?

The DTs are getting to be rubbish at sleeping. I am doing my best to completely cut out their naps in the day. DT2 the best at sleeping and DT1 has started going in with DS1 at night and sleeping through.

Hi Mars, glad to see u, been lookign out for you, need to ask you about OU extensions. I have a tma due in on wed that I haven't even started. I could spend all weekend doing it, but I really don't feel like it, especially as I've spent nearly every evening this week catchign up followign computer failure and the weather is sooo nice. I want to ask for an extension but have never asked before. I was goin to tell her abotu the computer failure, will that be good enough? And how long do they generally give you? I am really hoping for the following monday, so that is 4 days.

you are doing so well, I don't know how you are keeping everyhting going atm! 5 kids, potty trainings dts, doula-ing, ou, concerts - are you superwoman????

Hope all is well with u too, fg?

how's the pg going, hm if you are lurking at all?

Hiya Kelly. Telling her about the computer should be enough. You don't need too much detail. They tend to be reasonable, esp if you're only asking for an extra week (not month like me ). So ask away.

Life as you can imagine is busy, but I like it like this. If you don't see me here and ever want to give me a shout I check my email regularly: lovelymarslady at aol dot com.

Right now I'm sorting out sample contracts to take with me tomorrow. I'm a working woman you know lol

lol, good luck with it, glad things are going so well for you. Itmsut be amazing work, and I am slightly .

Thanks so much for the advice, have now emailed her, so fingers crossed!

Hello all - what have I missed??? Just got back from two wonderful weeks in Borneo meeting up with DH's sis and family from Aus. The DTs absolutely loved it and were jumping in the pool like pros by the end of the fortnight. Flights were not too painful - why do people worry so much? HO ho (backs off as people throw missiles).

How is everybody, fill me in in 10 words or less, I cant read all the posts!!!! (yes, lazy, I have an excuse I am pg)

hm: I'm now a working doula. My OU assignment was sent, the next is only 2 weeks late to date.

Glad your hols were good. Hope you and bump are well.

(Short enough babe? )

Tee hee, thanks Mars - I feel like I've been here the whole two weeks now!!

Wow, a working doula - does this mean being called out in the middle of the night? How on earth do you cope with your (gulp) 5 children!!!???

They have a father lol!

Hi girls!

For HMs benenfit:

I'm ticking off the days until helper woman leaves and trying not to rant about her

I'm being obssesive compulsive about the holiday shopping/packing and exhausting myself doing it

I unusually fell out with DP at the weekend, we made up easily (but the underlying cause lurks beneath........... to be continued some other lifetime in a land where wine bottles outnumber people)

I've had decorators in and the bits they've done look great

That was 10 words honest, I just have this great way of laying everything out so it looks like more . Its called making a fuss about nothing !!!! lmao

Oh girls, I'm a bit fed up today. Fed up feeling like I'm a single mum.

Don't get me wrong DP has a career not a job and I'm wholly behind that and I don't resent him one bit for it since I am not career driven at all. His hard work provides a wonderful lifestyle for us all and he does work hard and is a good dad and partner.

But, all the day to day stuff comes down to me and I'm happy to do it but sometimes I wish I had someone to share it with, an ear to listen when I'm frustrated, an opinion different from my own, someone to tell me when a plumber is pissing me about and someone to show me where the screen wash goes in the car. I'm currently staring at the European Health Insurance forms I need to complete for the holiday and I can't be arsed. I want someone else to do it. I want someone to say "I'll do it tonight", "yeah, I can get milk on the way home", "you pop out tonight for a swim and I'll cook".

I'm just moaning because he's going away this weekend as well and I'll be on my own, again. I only recently realised what I feel is lonely. Its no wonder I drink, it makes me feel less lonely .

Anyway....... yesterday the DTs found and ate stock cubes, then neatly popped all the wrappers and the empty box into the bucket, terrorised a spider into early death (I tried to save it but there was no WAY I was doing mouth to mouth), and then after popping some laundry upstairs I returned to the kitchen to find DT1 standing on top of the worktop. OMG!!!!!! When did she learn to do THAT.

Sorry, I can't raise much of a smile today, feeling sorry for myself.

FG I often feel the same. DH makes it back for bath and bedtime on average twice a week, often leaves in the morning before I do the whole breakfast/getting ready thing too.

Hi HM, my DP works away all week, every week so I'm on my own morning, noon and night, I get up around 6.30am, get 4 of us dressed, fed, packed lunch made and DD ready for school by 8.15am, the day continues at a frantic pace until I flop into bed usually about 11.30pm and then there is through the night wakenings......I just feel its not balanced at the mo, I feel I have the lions share but I'm probably only looking at it from my own perspective..... And I feel DD gets shoved out of the way all the time while the DTs command all the attention, make all the noise and generally consume me totally. DD gets whats left of me once the DTs are in bed and its not a lot.

I'm just really pissed off that he's going away for the weekend too (social). Ooooooh I could go on and on but I'm just in a mood and need to send myself to bed.

So as you aren't coming to make use of the lovely white, stress-free, billowing curtained room......... maybe I should come up to you? I could practise my postnatal doula bits on you, maybe a new recipe or two, fill in the forms and pick up the milk.

FG is he a management consultant? DH used to be and was away from v early Monday to v late on a Friday, I hated it.
He has just resigned from the job he is in (we work at the same company now) and may end up getting a contract away again so I may well be in the same boat as you soon.

I can offer no advice, only {{{hugs}}}
I really couldn't cope with that sort of thing. I need company, would go crazy if dp worked away all the time. He changed his job because they wanted him to start doing the o/n day trip away once or twice a month. We live in each others pockets, but wouldn't have it any other way. I even gate crashed his works do. Was a great night tho, we both got plastered on pink champagne and went rollign through the town.

The dts are also getting far too smart. dt2 wants to be grown up, he charges into he car, sits on the drivers seat, reaches for the seat belt and the gear lever. dt1 is being annoying, won't share anythign and lets out an ear piercing shriek if anyone even looks at what he is holding.

We've been making the most of the sun, and the garden now looks like a soft paly area, whih inflatables everywhere! the dt love it out there, and while they are in the garden my house stays nicely pristine.

Thank you all x.

I didn't enjoy it but it wasn't so bad after all and I have picked myself up and dusted myself off to begin again. I think it was the anticipation of him being away at the weekend after the week (and enjoying himself) that was worse than the actual event.

I managed to get into bed at 10pm on Saturday night (wow), flicked on the TV and a film was just starting.........with Ben Affleck.....oooh I thought, this is the business . I haven't seen a film for ages let alone one all the way through. It was mindless and harmless and for one moment I was Gwyneth Paltrow snogging Ben Affleck on that beach . I also managed to consume most of a bottle of wine around bath time but was perfectly sober to enjoy the film .

Our helper lady was to ease the workload a little but I'm a hard woman to help, I have such firm ideas of how I like things done and so although her departure will mean even more to do on my own at least I won't have to tolerate they way she talks to my kids.

Mars thank you that sounds heavenly, the only problem is, I'd be nipping round hoovering, buying flowers and preparing hearty homecooked meals for your arrival and I guess that would defeat the purpose as I said I'm a hard woman to help .

Kelly, your DTs and mine both - DT1 likes my seat in the car too. They resist their car seats so much! Last week I dropped something into the bin to see an empty box of stock cubes.......I was confused, I hadn't been using stock cubes. Then I found two neatly rolled up wrappers and the ends of two stock cubes . Can you imagine the taste!!!!!! I was quite pleased since they had after all tidied up after themselves. Then later I found another two half eaten ones in beside some toys! Mine are individually lovely but such hard work toether atm. They are squabbling over toys and hitting each other (not sorely but I don't like it). They have also perfected the technique 'I can hit as long as i say sorry after'.

Anyway, I'm not here, I'm faaaaaarrrrr too busy

BTW......

Kelly, did you get Ravi's head shaved? And did he look even more handsome?

Mars, lovely news that your doula-ing is taking off, I think its such a gift that you have and I wish the support was mandatory!!

HM, hope your tummy is expanding. Mine seems to be on your behalf but I think its the fact that the 60 bar box of Cadburys Fudge has only 3 bars left.......oh well, shame to see them lying alone so I'm going to offer myself on a plate to them

yuck at the stock cubes. And don't u know that stock is baaad for babies!

dt2 managed to open the laundry tablet I left out for the next load at the weekend. It was a dodgy box, they were all crumbly, and so he was foaming at the mouth and I had to scrape it off his tongue. Then he was sick. He recovered tho, and has whiter than white teeth now.

Didn't get rav's hair done, as it is due on the 23rd of this month, but his family are going away. So they are now saying we should do it on his bday next year. So I'm not supposed to cut his hair before them. 'Cept I'm prob going to accidently trim it a bit and get ot of it.
I've decided, after looking back at pics that Rav jsut would not suit a bald head at all. For one thing, he has plagiocephaly (flat head) and he needs the hair to cover that up a bit. they both had it, shay has rounded out nicely but Rav is still rather flat. It's not too noticeable under nice baby curls.

I have a nice rounded belly too, and not even a sniff at a fudge. My mother pissed me off a bit when she came to visit by saying twice that I looked preggers. I really can't stand my parents these days.

Oh Kelly I'm lmao at the washing tablets!! Think I might give it a go myself actually, always fancied whiter teeth!!

Parents eh, nothing like a bit of love to keep you on the straight and narrow. Wish it was different for you honey. Did you tell her you'd just swallowed the cat since you ran out of pot noodles.........

nope, I told her some of us have better things to do than spend 12 hours a week down the gym

Well good for you Kelly, fight fire with fire!!POWER TO THE PEOPLE!

Does anyone else find it a real problem getting them to go to sleep at night?

My dts, particularly dts1 makes a terrible racket and I usually end up running up and downstairs in what DH laughingly calls "my time." They are 4 1/2 now, I worry that although they generally go to bed at 7.30 (two hours after dinner) they don't go to sleep til sometime after 8 and even 9. Again dts1 is first to wake up at about 7am.

I suppose I am just being over anxious as usual but I am so tired and worry they are not getting enough sleep. I'm at the stage of using threats and bribery, neither of which I want to do.