D'y ever wonder how life got like this?

[FrumpyGrumpy]

New to MN but like what I read so far. Struggling to get by day by day at the minute and feeling isolated but not enough to make the effort to join in the 'groups' the whole world seems to think are just what I need!!!!

Have daughter of 4 and girl and boy twins of eight months. Not had time since they were born when all three kids have been well, am I just cursed? Throw in a house move that took 6 months, a partner that works away most of the week and a mother-in-law I can wait another lifetime to deal with and I've ended up the sort of person I used to look at and wonder how life got like that.

Anyone give me hope that when the babes are eighteen months I'll feel better?!! If not, anyone tell me that alternate nights of gin then chocolate is an ok passage through?

Potty training?

I was thinking of leaving that for their first girlfriends / boyfriends to deal with ....

I have bagged up all the luck I can find and will send it to you c/o The Samaritans ok? I've included plastic sheeting for your desk. Well..... you never know!!!

Hi Kelly, it was a Cadbury's finger of fudge and its GONE NOW! However, I did buy a 60 bar box from Costco. Want me to bag some up, I'm doing a parcel for Mars anyway .

Would love to tippy tap with you for a bit since we're not often here at the same time but I have to pack up for school .

Stay alive girls x.

As long as you don't go and get yourself into a prang fg. That would be too much to bear!

We keep missing each other. I went out to my friend's deli today to ensure I did some study. No telephone or MN to come between me and my work.

I'm fine today. I went to a lambada class this evening. It was delicious! My best friend drove me and I was fine in the car, so I think I'm okay now. The shakes have moreorless gone and despite living in a haze yesterday, I'm back!

I'm sleeping and having an early night.

I sneaked on for a peek and now its later and right now DT1 has cried and said "muuuuuumy"!! I knew I shouldn't have sang Lionel Ritchie.

Marsy, you just can't keep a good woman down can you!!! Car crash, lambada, car crash, lambada, I'm trying to work out how your poor bruises managed it but hell, if there was half a chance of swooozlin round a dancefloor I'd be there too! Glad you are feeling a bit better.

I can't wait to practise my lambada (the forbidden dance) on some hunky guys!

FORBIDDEN?

Ah, now I'm even more interested. And you say you can do it with the male of the species?

I feel a leg wax coming on.

It started back in the 1930s but the Catholic church banned it for being too sensual.

Have you ever seen Dirty Dancing? It's what they are doing in the opening credits. Swoon! So a nice tall handsome man who lambadas and you're away! lol

One..............two,three..four................five,six..One..............two,three

(I have to get Broadband, getting to the end of this thread is like me running the marathon)

Have I seen Dirty Dancing?

"nobody puts Baby in a corner"
"I carried a watermelon"
"I'm scared of never feeling my whole life what it is that I feel when ..... I'm with you"

"now won't you staaaaayy, just a little bit loooonger"

oh fg! I love you. I'm thankful to God for whatever sent you MN's way.

And now I'll take my vaguely concussed self off to bed!

Aw shucks Mars . I'm an antisocial grumpalump (to steal a Kelly word that I fell love with) but when music and me get together I come over all Legs & Co .

I have had the busiest day (and its got a long way to go, I'm just here to eat a tuna sandwich before I get busy again). I've achieved lots and nothing. Lots, helping two family members but nothing achieved that I had planned for myself (big pile of paperwork and other things I'm too scared to think about). I wanted to and I feel good about it but I have robbed myself of some precious time and will pay the price in frustration...... ANYWAY, that was a long way of saying that when I get a moment later I'm on to Amazon to order the Dirty Dancing Soundtrack on CD. I can't get it out of my head now, its like an itch that won't get relief until I play it constantly for at least 2 weeks.

"Sylvia..... Yes Mickey
How do you call your Loverboy?
C'MERE LOVERBOY
And if he doesn't answer?
Oh Loverboy
And if he STILL doesn't answer?
I simply say baaaaaybee, oooooo, my sweet baaaaybee, ooooo, my sweet baaaaaybee..... you're the one"

lol, what are you two like! I am rather of mars tho, doing hte lambada. In my case though, it will have to remain forbidden or I'll never bed a man again.
I gotta see dirty dancing now! #I've HAD the TIME of my LIIIIIFE!!###

Come on, ladies!

God wouldn't have given you maracas
if he didn't want you to shake them!

PMSL, I read that as mascara, twice! When I shake my pitiful maracas I get a wheeze in my chest, seriously, I've just tried it!! LMAO

How are your war wounds today Mars?

Today I ache and ache and ache! Had to cancel lunch, pop the twins into playgroup for the day and am just off to bed!

Shame Mars. It does sometimes take a few days to come out. I remember going horseriding once and for the three days that followed feeling just fine. Then by the fourth.......was walking like John Wayne and couldn't do stairs at all !!! Got any Radox? Lavender oil?

I'm feeling better now. Still, INSET day tomorrow so I don't have to walk up that blimming hill.

I met another couple today. They've booked me! Yay! Looks like I have myself a new career!

I start potty training tomorrow. Oh dear Lord. lol

How are you all doing? HM... how's the bump?

How's the potty trainign going mars?

I start tomorrow Kelly. Think of me fondly won't you? lol

Have just watched DT1 experiment with objects she can climb on. She took a packet of nappies and put them behind the couch. She climbed on but couldn't quite reach the top of the couch. Then she got a book, same result, then some videos with the same result. Finally she took a toy bridge....success!

I'm enjoy their last nappied moments (though I'm only aiming for day time dryness currently). I've taken down the potties and am ready [gulp] for tomorrow.

Hi girls, tried to post last night but had to scramble off in a hurry as DT1 started vomitting. Didn't so much feel like dinner after that......

It was nothing but ramble anyway so no matter. I'm craving quiet, unscheduled time. How can I get there? Life gets too much sometimes!

Anyway, tell us how many pairs of pants you've got on the go Mars (DTs not personally ). I'm glad you're doing this first, we can call upon your skills later in the year!!

oh fg... they don't like the pants. lol

Actually to be fair, DT1 likes pulling them up and down. DT2 would rather be nakid!

It's a long day but I think we're doing okay. DT1 hasn't wee-ed all day, but Hayls said that her dd held on for 9 hours!!!!!!!!!!!!!! So, I'll just have to be patient.

DT1 currently sat on a care mat watching Bob the Builder/The Wiggles. DT2 just playing around and watching telly too.

Want them to crack it so that I can get out and about soon.

Hi girls, need a rant..... (ooh never used that emoticon before)

The woman that helps out Wed and Thurs is here. She finishes in just over a month (my choice, we employed her for a year, between 2.30pm and 7pm, 2 days to help me get through since DP is always away and it was always the intention that I'd go it alone thereafter). It has given me time to pick up DD from school those days alone and have a quiet time to do homework and to have help with baths etc. On the flip side I'm beginning to really DISLIKE HER . She makes no secret of the fact that she doesn't really care for DT2 (he's a boy and sometimes he cries and she doesn't think boys should cry, especially not cry for their mummy). HE'S 22 MONTHS FFS!!!! She doesn't even call him by his name, she calls him "master frumpygrumpy". DT1 was sick on Monday and DT2 has had a runny bot all day today so I think he has a little bug. He wants nothing to do with her and is like this every time he's ill or teething. She takes it very personally and repeats that he is being a "very silly boy, you've been just fine" in front of me. I feel the skin on my body crawling and I supress the urge to shout "well, just F** off then, I'll pay you in full now if you just bugger off and leave us alone, don't you know I make excuses some days so you won't come" (and I only have her the 2 days!). I actually pretend that one of my parents is popping in after work so I can get rid of her around 6pm and do baths myself. It will be tougher not having the extra hands but I'm a hands on mum that is extremely particular about how my kids are handled and spoken to and I'm sick of her. AND she's soooo loud. I calm my kids by talking quietly and into their eyes so they know they have my attention and don't need to shout and she bawls at me across the room, and over my kids who I'm talking to, to tell me a story about her life or her daughters, CONSTANTLY. I pour wine and leave the room because I find her unbearable and I pity my poor kids that are down there with her (even though 2 of them like her).

And Another THING!!!! She insists on letting the DTs walk to the park, while she pushes the buggy, even though I have told her twice that I don't want that to happen. One of them only has to make a dash for the road and then the other is alone and in danger while she runs after the first one. I live in fear every time she does it and the second time I told her I didn't like it I said I would buy a harness if she wanted to walk them there, SHE IGNORES ME! THEY ARE MY KIDS AND THEY ARE PRECIOUS TO ME AND I PAY THE SALARY.

And breathe.......

Don't get me wrong, in the beginning it was helpful, I wanted to settle DD into school and having extra hands when they were younger was good. She can be caring and thoughtful. BUT, it can only be a good sign that I can't wait for July to come and to see the back of her because it will mean I have reached the point that I thought I'd never get to and thats the point of taking care of my 3 children on my own and happily and when I started this thread all those months and months ago I thought I'd never get here. I'm so glad I have this thread to show me my progress. (And it wasn't just progress on the DT front it was personal progress and overcoming my own demons.)

Girls, I think I've made it. I think I've broken through into a place I haven't been in a long time. I thank you all personally for helping me get here (and that's not the wine talking because I've only had 2 slugs ).

Whew..... and breathe.........

Sorry to be dramatic but I think bashing this out has cleared something in my head.

I think I'm done now .

fg, she sounds a nightmare! It sounds like boundaries need reaffirming, maybe you need to sit down and have a chat with her? I agree totally that it is crazy to try to walk dts to the park. I took mine all to the farm yesterday, put their brightest tops on and it was still hard work keeping track of them, and I lost rav when he went traispsing over a bridge. If it is too late to put your foot down now, how about cutting down her days again. Grit your teeth and lay it on saying that you and the kids need time to adjust to her not helping out for much longer.
If all else fails, feel free to come and rant as much as you like!

A quick question, does everyone put their dts to bed at the same time? Mine are getting very bad for egging each other on. They jump up and down, rattle the cots, bang bottles, throw all their blankets out, open the curtains, shout, etc. This can go on for hours. I brought shay back down as he is teething and wouldn't settle and Rav went straight to sleep. Then I put him back and he went straight down. I'm wondering whether to make it a regular thing.

Hi Kelly, you were a brave girl reading all that I posted . I've already cut her back saying we need to adjust and she will only be here 1 day for the next 2 weeks, thereafter its only about 2/3 weeks before our holiday and I will tell her she can have the rest of the time off as paid leave until she finishes (not worth it for a couple of weeks!) I could go on and on but I'm limiting myself to that one big rant and hopefully I can wing it for her limited time...... Thank you for that .

Mine have separate rooms since DT2 slept so well I didn't want DT1 waking him every night. I take them into their rooms one by one and do a quick story (leaving DD babysitting the other in my room, she's exceptionally good at it!). They both go down about 7pm. If it works to do them separately then fine. I guess you just worry that one night if the first one takes a while to fall asleep that you are stuck with the other for a bit.... Personally I'd keep going in to tuck them back, even if it took hours, just so they get the message its your rules, its bedtime and its lie down and be quiet time. Exhausting, especially at that time of night when you need some quiet of your own! However, as is always the case, its whatever gets you through the night in my book!!

Another thought, what time to they nap in the day? Are they definitely knackered enough?

They nap after lunch, should be tired enough. It never really seems to work quite right though. Yesterday they both walked around the farm all day, but I was more tired out than them! I think I might persevere with repeatedly putting them down for a bit longer, like you say, I need to show them who is boss. I don't actually mind having one up for a bit longer as it is very rare I get one to one time with them. I don't want to encourage them to start staying up late in the evenings though.

The dts looked so sweet yesterday, walkign around peering into the enclosures. The only thing that did spoil it a bit was being stared at and talked about. Or the banal comments - 'ooh you've got your hands full!' I am really getting rather fed up with it. If it isn't the twins it is ds when he goes off on one. I jsut wish ppl would beak OUT!